Page 96 of Play to Win

He slowly shakes his head.“You told Chris you’d go back when he showed he could deal with his shit.”

“Right.”I move my chin up and down, holding his gaze.

“He hasn’t done that yet.”

“No.But ...”I swallow.“What if he never does?”

“I told you, Lace, you can stay as long as you want.”

“No, I can’t!”I close my eyes.“I mean, we can’t just have this weird, open-ended relationship forever.Your mom wants a wedding.Someday you’ll meet the woman you want to have that wedding with.The woman you want to spend the rest of your life with.”

He reaches out and curls his fingers around mine on the table.“Lacey.I’m fine right now.I’m not interested in a forever relationship.”

I feel that like a throat punch, but I try not to flinch.

“I’m focused on this job and proving myself,” he continues.“I’m fine with the way things are now.I like you here.We have fun together.”

“Sometimes I think you don’t want to have fun.”

He flashes a rueful smile.“I’m not used to having fun.But I kind of like it.”

“I don’t want to distract you from your goals.”

For a moment, he doesn’t respond to that, and fear scrapes inside me that Iamdistracting him.Then he says, “I won’t let you.”

That doesn’t make me feel much better.

“Look, this is weird for me too.I like having plans and knowing what’s going to happen.But I don’t think either of us is in a position right now to make plans other than maybe for next week.”His lips quirk up at the corners.

He’s right.

“So,” he continues.“I’m learning to live in the moment and just enjoy what we have right now.”

I suck briefly on my bottom lip, then nod.“Okay.I can do that too.And ...”I hold his gaze.“Iamenjoying what we have right now.”

He squeezes my hand.“Me too.”

Okay.

He tells me more about firing Joe, the coach, and we take our time eating our delicious food and drinking the amazing wine he ordered and watching the sunset, and even though everything is sort of bizarre, I’m having the best time of my life.

* * *

“They didn’t giveme much training.”

I’m having lunch with Everly and Taylor on a Saturday a few weeks later, talking about my new job at Jolie.

“Just threw me into things.”

“Sink or swim,” Taylor says.“You’re doing fine, though.”

“It’s been hard.”I sip my mojito.“But I think I’m figuring it all out.And I really do love helping people with makeup.The rep from Smashbox was in the other day, and she was really impressed with how I helped a customer.”

“That’s great.”

“And how’s the course going?”Taylor asks.

I signed up to take a course at Bella Academy, a prominent cosmetology school in Hollywood.“So far, so good.It was expensive, but hopefully I’ll learn more.”

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