Page 2 of Daddy's Little Chaos Gremlin

He was my everything, but there was no denying that there was a hole in our lives we’d been aching to fill. Maybe the universe had given up on waiting for us to get our heads out of our assess and stop putting off the quest for someone who’d be more than temporary. After all, settling hadn’t gotten us anywhere but frustrated and I’d had enough of seeing that grumpy pout on my dear boy’s face.

So what was that he’d said about looking for a dancer?

Someone flexible?

I wrote down both and of course, my own desire to find someone who was willing and eager to nurse. Over the last year, we’d found a handful who claimed to be, but it was more of a fetish for them, a fascination with the process and a desire to poke and prod at my chest to see if they could get the milk to flow. Not only had it been insulting and downright demeaning to be treated that way, but their actions had so infuriated Tristan that he’d ordered them away before he finished his sculpture and melted the metal down to repurpose into something useful. There was a fruit bowl on the kitchen counter he cursed out whenever he grabbed a banana. Its name was Brian.

We had a trio of floor vases named Calvin, Glenn and Moe, but my personal favorite was a cock-and-ball-shaped candelabra named William, or as I tended to refer to it, Willy. Tristan had sketched up the idea in the midst of a rather inspired meltdown after William the self-proclaimed yoga guru had been forced to admit that the only pose he could actually maintain was the gods-be-damned lotus position.Iwas capable of that, for fuck’s sake.

The fact that he’d lied his way through the interview had been bad enough, add in how much of my boy’s time was wasted onthe initial photographs, brainstorming and sketching ideas, as well as arranging all the materials in his workspace, and I’d been more pissed on his behalf than I’d been the time I’d been forced to fire a dumbass for failing to notice danger to a client because he’d been too busy sucking up to the one who’d arranged for her to be in peril in the first place. I swear sometimes folks thought more with their wallets and their ambitions than they did with the brains the Goddess gave them.

Honesty, integrity, a love of the arts and entertaining. That wasn’t too much to ask now, was it? Long-term and live-in seemed like bigger deal breakers to me, though experience had proven that there were those who were willing to say or do anything the moment they got a look at the house.

So, we’d hold the next interview somewhere else, and I was certain I knew just the place.

It was late, though, so I’d have to touch base with Shane in the morning to see if one of the furnished apartments he rented out was currently unoccupied. If so, I had no doubt he’d allow us the use of it, especially once I explained the reason. He had several horror stories of his own regarding gold diggers and unscrupulous so-called friends who’d only been interested in what he could do for them. It seemed to be an unfortunate byproduct of being successful and one that was difficult to detect until you were smacked across the face with someone’s betrayal.

I addedone week trial periodto the list along with a note reminding me to inquire about the monthly rent so I could go ahead and secure a unit to have at the ready. With no way to predict how long the process would take, that might be the safest bet and help Shawn out in the process. Sometimes those rooms stood empty for months before someone snagged one fora couple months while they investigated the area and looked for work.

Decision made, I jotted one final thing before setting the legal pad aside and climbing in bed. There were a lot of things I could live without, many of which I had in my younger years, but there was one Tristan and I dearly loved and engaged in as often as possible and no, it wasn’t sex as so many potential partners assumed.

It was cuddles.

I’d pump every day until my body stopped producing if we found someone who ticked off the rest of the boxes on that list…but I’d be damned before I condemned my boy and I to a relationship that lacked snuggles.

Was no reason not to when I’d nearly been damned for much less.

2

ZEPHYR

I’d never slept in a bed this comfy, which made it super hard to want to get out, not that I had much to get up for. The bed had become my little safe space, but with every day I returned to my room without finding work, I grew more and more worried about having to give it up.

What then?

Through no fault of my own I had no family to go back to. Even if they’d take me in, I’d never subject myself to being treated like the hired help by people who’d always made me feel likeIwas a burden because of the mess my folks had made of their lives.

That wasn’t on me.

The main reason I’d left in the first place was because I was tired of wearing that anchor around my neck. My choices might not have worked out the way I’d hoped they would, but they’d never hurt anyone. If anything,I’dbeen the one to wind up hurt in the end…and here in this beautiful little bed and breakfast run by the most adoring couple I’d ever met.

The way Bruce and Brenner were with one another, whoa,hashtag relationship goals. Looking at them, I could see the love they had for one another shimmering in their eyes whenever they glimpsed the other’s way. I just knew they’d torch the gates of hell to keep the other safe. Someday I hoped to find that, but first, I needed to get up, get in the shower, and resume my job search before the temptation to lie there wrapped in soft, fluffy blankets overrode common sense.

I just hated the questions I knew were coming should I manage to wrangle an interview. Twice now I’d had to explain that while for the last three and a half years I had been employed as an acrobat in a traveling troupe of performers, I had plenty of experience stocking shelves, filling orders, whipping up meals and tackling every manner of household chores both inside and out. I just didn’t have any references to prove it. Funny thing about working for family, especially when you were working in the family home. They were the only ones who knew how hard you tried or what lengths you went through to get things done. If they chose to turn a blind eye to it, ignore your efforts because you were nothing to them but a barely tolerated inconvenience, well then it wasn’t like they were gonna tell someone what a good job you’d done if they came asking.

Coupled with the fact that I was a stranger in town with no permanent address, I fully understood why folks were reluctant to take a chance on me. It just sucked, ‘cause I’d happily get an apartment if I could just get a job first so I could show potential landlords that I had money coming in. It was a vicious cycle, but I was grateful to Bruce and Brenner for solving one problem for me and allowing me to use the address of the bed and breakfast for as long as I was here.

Okay, Zephyr, time to get moving, jobs don’t find themselves.

I was out the door in under thirty minutes, hair still damp and curling around my ears but at least the bright purple, aqua and pink tones were fading, drawing fewer glances from folks when they first saw me. It sucked, ‘cause I loved when the colors were fresh and shimmering. Seeing them in the mirror or the glass of a storefront always made me smile and straighten my shoulders whenever I was tempted to hunch them and hide.

I never wanted to hide again or feel ashamed for just being me.

As I wandered past storefronts hoping to see a help wanted sign, the phone in my pocket buzzed and I immediately pressed my back against the brick of a nearby building so I wouldn’t be in anyone’s way when I went to answer it.

“Hello?”

Yes, my name is Rowan Williams. I am looking for Zephyr Murry.

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