Page 19 of Broken Chorus

“Death is unavoidable, including yours,” Aaron pointed out. “You can’t guarantee something won’t happen between now and some random point in the future. You can hope it won’t, but the universe is too chaotic to ever make the kind of promise you’re after.”

Hawk sat up, turning towards him with frustration etched into his face. “You know what the fuck I mean.”

“I know that shit happens, and a promise made in one moment might not mean a pile of shit ten years down the line.”

“Then I guess you’ve got your answer right there. Besides, us dating was the biggest comedy of errors since Kazzy staggered out on stage in a pair of Sierra’s yoga pants,” Hawk declared.

Now that hurt. Sucking in a breath, he thought to defend what they’d had but it was clear that none of it meant anything to Hawk, not the way that it still meant to Aaron. Six months ago, it had seemed like they’d finally gotten it right and worked past all the bullshit they’d struggled with over the years. If Hawk would just take a chance on him, he’d prove that he’d be in it for the long haul…only it suddenly dawned on him that maybe that was the heart of the issue, that Hawk didn’t want forever with him.

“Dude, do you remember all those swirls? That color pallet was like an acid trip gone bad,” Hawk reminisced, chuckling fondly at the memory.

Swallowing hard, Aaron choked down the swell of emotions that threatened to spill from his eyes in a long stream of hot, humiliating tears. Instead, he forced out a laugh and muttered, “I know, right.”

“I’ve got a picture of that mess hanging in the music room,” Hawk said. “It’s good for a laugh every time I open the door.”

“I could always plug in my guitar and accompany you sometime,” Aaron offered, desperate to keep some shred of a connection in place.

“Yeah well, you’d better be prepared to sing backup.”

Aaron shook his head, his laugh coming out dry and a bit broken, though he was grateful that Hawk chose to overlook it, if he’d even noticed. “I don’t sing. That’s your thing, remember?”

“Might have been my thing when I was part of the band, but I heard you singing to Dani, you could fill my slot and yours if you’ll just get your head out of your ass and go talk to Kelly.”

“To do that, I’d have to go back to the city, which isn’t what I’m in the mood to do right now.”

“Then you’d better figure out how to be,” Hawk said in that cold, no nonsense tone of his. “You can visit periodically, you can video chat as often as you’d like, but you can’t stay until you’re sure you’re done with everything out there that could possibly drag you away from here.”

Aaron sucked in a breath, smarting a little at the rejection, but not too blind to hear the offer that was mingled in with the other words.

“Is that a promise?” Aaron asked, knowing he sounded needy, hopeful, and almost desperate. Each time he came up here it got harder and harder to leave. He knew a day was coming, maybe even soon, when he’d fall onto his knees and beg Hawk to let him stay.

“You know I never say anything I don’t mean,” Hawk told him.

Aaron was so relieved, he didn’t think, he just turned until he could straddle Hawk’s lap, hug him and breathe in the scent of Hawk, sugar, woods and mushed up vegetables. When Hawk’s arms locked around him, Aaron sunk into the embrace, nuzzling Hawk’s neck and clinging. Hands rubbed down his back and stroked his hair, a low, rumbling sigh emanating from Hawk.

“And then you do something like this, and I want to kick myself for ever suggesting you leave,” Hawk murmured, holding Aaron flush against him and rocking him in his lap.

“Hawk…” Aaron groaned when he did it again, the press of him, hard behind his zipper, making Aaron long for the one thing they’d been even better at doing together then making music.

“For old time’s sake,” Hawk groaned. “Let me have you. Please. I…fuck it’s been so long…”

Moaning, Aaron rolled his hips, grinding against him. “Whatever you want.”

Hawk’s hands guided him into a frenzied cadence of friction as they frotted against one another like teenagers, desperate, needy whines spilling from between their lips.

“Uncle Hawk…I wet my bed!” A voice whined. The pair shot away from each other like they were fifteen and the porch light had just been turned on. Aaron panted, while Hawk muttered a curse and banged his head against the back of the couch.

“I’ll be right there!” Hawk called, voice ragged and edged with frustration.

“Grab an empty laundry basket and replacement sheets and I’ll go strip the bed,” Aaron said, shoving to his feet before Hawk could protest. As he headed down the hall towards Liam’s room and the little boy standing in the doorway, light spilling out behind him as he rubbed his eyes, he was aware of how frequent interruptions like these would happen. The thing that shocked him a little, was how okay he was with it as long as it meant waking up to Hawk and the kids every morning until the end of time.

Chapter 5

Best Monkey Wrangler Ever

How!

How was the guy who’d grown up with the most joyless people Hawk had ever met, be better at keeping the kids entertained and engaged than he was?

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