Page 85 of Shadow Bound

“Do you want me to hurt you?” I hiss at him.

“No baby, but I do want you to live and for that to happen, I need you to complete the bond. I just found you, I’m not about to watch you starve to death.”

“I’m going to kill you, Ransom!” My voice is a hoarse scream, every fiber in my being fighting for two different things. My love and need to protect this man, and the unquenchable hunger that is wracking my body.

“I don’t think you will,” he argues far too casually.

He pulls his shirt from over his head, leaving him in only his jeans and boots. Not looking away from me, he reaches into the back pocket of his jeans and pulls one of my knives out. I watch in horror and a bit of fascination as he drags the blade across the juncture of his neck. The wound is not deep enough to cause any real damage, but it’s enough for his blood to pour freely.

“Come and get it, baby.” He tosses the knife far off to the side and holds his hands up at his side, beckoning me to him. A taunting smirk sits on his face, there isn’t an ounce of fear in his eyes.

I fight as hard as I can, but I can’t look away from the blood running down his bare chest. My body is hurting, the hunger pangs making me whimper. The monster side wins.

In a flash I have the shackles undone and I’m charging at him like a starved leopard. He doesn’t attempt to run, if anything he moves toward me, meeting me halfway. When I lunge at him, I send us flying backward onto the forest floor. We land on the ground with me on top of him, my thighs straddling either side of his torso. His arms wrap around my body, holding me to him.

My fangs are buried deep in his neck before we even hit the ground. I’m barely aware of his slight hiss of pain as they pierce his skin. I know the pain only lasts a second, the venom in my fangs will make it feel good for him. He’ll feel nothing but pleasure as I feed off of him. He’ll have no idea that I will be literally sucking the life from him.

Just as I feared, feeding off of Ransom is pure ecstasy. I haven’t fed from a live host in almost a year, I forgot what it was like to drink fresh blood like this. None of the people I’ve ever fed from compare to Ransom. No one and nothing has ever tasted or felt as good as he does.

Gulp after greedy gulp, I drink his blood. His hands rub soothing circles down my spine and he whispers sweet nothings in my ear. I hear him talking, but I’m not comprehending what he’s saying, my only focus is his blood. The more I drink, the more Ifeelhis presence in me, it’s like I’m melding him to me right now.

I want to slow down, to have more control over how much I’m drinking, but I can’t stop myself. If I thought the small amounts of his blood I’d had in the past filled me with energy, it’s nothing compared to how I feel now. It’s like I have an electrical storm in my body. My veins hum and buzz with energy. The pain that has been pretty constant in my head and stomach for ten months disappears. Strength, like I’ve never known, fills my bones and muscles.

My body is finally getting the blood it was destined to have. Made specifically for me.

When his soft murmurs quiet, I still don’t stop. When his arms fall from holding me and fall limply to the ground beside him, I don’t stop. When his chest, the one I’m pressed against, begins to rise and fall less with his breaths, I still don’t stop.

Stop!I scream at myself.You’re killing him!

I try to pull away, but my body refuses to cooperate. It hasn’t had enough, but that’s the problem. It won’t have enough until Ransom is empty.

Please stop.

“Everyone I touch dies. I don’t want to be like this anymore.”My plea to Nessa when I was six years old comes to me, repeating in my head like a broken record. She’d told me I was doing exactly what I was meant to do—that I was created as nothing more than a predator to bring death and destruction. I knew at six years old I didn’t want to be the person I was made to be. There were a couple of years where I may have forgotten it, but Ransom was the one who showed me it was possible to change.I need him.

STOP!I scream at myself at the same time I rip away from him, flinging myself backward, backpedaling away from him to create distance. Ransom’s blood drips from the corner of my mouth, feeling absolutely disgusted with myself, I hastily wipe it away with the back of my hand.

My chest heaves and my hands shake from the adrenaline. For the first time in a long time, I don’t feel hungry. The monster I’d lived with for most of my life is quiet, sated. Panting, I lift my head and look at where Ransom lies. I want to go to him, but my body refuses to move, too afraid to confirm what I’m thinking.I killed him.

Terror rips through me when I see how still he is. His usually tan skin is pale and ashen. His beautiful eyes are closed, and I desperately wish they’d open and look at me. I want him to tell me that it’s okay even though I know it isn’t.

The rush of Ransom’s blood entering my system is making my ears ring and no matter how hard I try, I can’t hear his heartbeat. I can’t even hear mine over the ringing sound.

I can’t remember the last time I felt the kind of fear I’m feeling right now, but it’s so overwhelming I can’t get my body to move closer to him. His face is so white, his lips are almost devoid of color.

All I can do is pull my knees to my chest and rock back and forth as I stare at his still body. The tears return for the second time tonight, they stream down my face in hot rivulets. I don’t even try to stop them, I let them run freely and when the sobs start to bubble up in my chest I embrace them.

Why did he do this?I knew this was going to happen, but he didn’t listen. “Why didn’t you listen?” I hoarsely whisper to Ransom even though I know he can’t answer.

I don’t know how long I sit there, sobbing and watching him for signs of life, but I can’t get myself to move. I’m cemented in place and an emotional wreck.I did this.

Seeing Ransom in this state hurts a thousand times more than when Alexandre died. The amount of pain I felt when I lost my brother was bearable, but right now the pain is excruciating. Nessa’s training and conditioning never once hurt me as much as this does.

A hand gripping my shoulder suddenly makes me jump out of my skin. Twisting my head, I meet eyes that look so much like Ransom’s—two sets of eyes actually.

Ryker kneels down beside me, his hand that’s still on my shoulder gives me a comforting squeeze. “Are you okay, Beau?” he asks, his voice soft and full of sympathy. I barely hear him over the rushing in my ears. I don’t have the mental power right now to psychoanalyze his sudden change in demeanor.

I shake my head at Ryker. “No,” I choke between sobs, the tears coming faster. “I think… I think I killed him.”

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