Page 113 of Gathered Sparkle

“He’s not a puppy,” I mutter, but the words sound weak, even to me.

After maybe another half hour of me watching and pining after him, Nicholas stands suddenly. “Thanks for the food. I’m heading home.” His gaze flicks to me briefly, sadness still lingering there when he turns and walks out of the living room.

Annabelle doesn’t miss a beat. “Tell me I’m wrong.”

“Nico, wait.” I push up from the couch and race after him, the hem of his shirt fluttering against my thighs as I move. I catch up just as he’s reaching the garage door and grab his arm, pulling him to a stop. “Please,” I beg breathlessly, unsure if it’s from the sprint or the rush of emotions swirling in me.

He turns, his expression carefully neutral, though I can see the tension in his jaw. It only makes the guilt twist harder in my chest. “What,Novalee?”

“Your shirt.” I fumble with the buttons, already pulling it off my shoulders. “Here, you should—”

“You can keep it.”

“But you’re…” My words falter as my gaze drops, and my eyes trace the lines of his chest and defined ab muscles. He’s stunning. My mouth goes dry, and I lose the thread of what I was going to say.

His finger hooks under my chin, tilting my head back up until my eyes meet his. For a fleeting moment, there’s something soft in his gaze, but it hardens just as quickly—a shield slamming into place. “You’ve got enough guys in there waiting for you.”

Ouch.

“Nico,” I breathe out, the ache in my tone clear as day.

“That wasn’t fair,” he says quickly. “I’m sorry. I’m just… I’m hurt, okay? I’m hurt, and maybe I should be the bigger person, but it’s fucking difficult. All of it is.” My lips part, but he keeps going, cutting my interruption. “My mother is a monster who killed one of my favorite people. I have to hang out with people I’ve hated for over a decade, people who hated me, only to find out things weren’t what they seemed. That we were apart because of some misunderstanding, and I spent years alone fornothing.”

Again, I want to open my mouth to apologize, but he barrels on. “And the person I thought I was in love with isn’t who she said she is. And she’s in love with three other men. And—”

“Nico,” I almost whimper.

He reaches out and brushes a stray strand of hair from my face. “You’re not the person you made me believe you are,” he says softly. But there’s no warmth in the words. They’re a wall going up between us.

“I would like to talk. To apologize, to explain—”

“Remember when I told you about the girl Veronica sent after me?” he cuts me off.

Shit.

“I do.”

“She sent her to get me out of my head. Out of my misery. To make me feel like someone thought I was important. She wanted me to go to all those events, to play her perfect son with a smile on my face because I had someone to take with me. Someone who made it seem… fun.”

His hand clenches at his side, and I can see the faint tremor in his fingers. “And it worked. God, it worked. But it wasn’t real. It took me way longer to figure that out than I’d like to admit. When I did, I hated her for it. Hated her for sending someone to manipulate me.” I can feel a lump forming in my throat, thick and heavy, but I can’t look away.

“But at the same time… I think, in her own twisted way, it came from a place of concern. She saw how lonely I was, how much I was drowning, and she wanted to end it. Sure, it was in her interest, her benefit, but maybe it was a little bit for me too.” I can barely swallow past the lump now, and I press my hand against my stomach, trying to steady myself. “But you? What you guys did? That wasn’t for me. That was solely for your benefit. Yes, I see where you were coming from. I understand why you did it, why you thought it had to be done. But that doesn’t make it easier.”

He huffs a bitter laugh. “Even my mother had my well-being in mind. You didn’t. You made me fall for you—” His voice cracks, and he stops, shaking his head before continuing. “Fall for you so hard, like I’ve never fallen for anyone. I thought, for once, someone was interested in the real me. Not the son of a hotel mogul. Not some heir. Justme. You made me believe you, only to pull the rug out from under me. Fuck the consequences. Fuck what happens to me afterward. Fuck howIfeel.”

“That’s not true.” Tears blur my vision. “I mean,yes, some of it is. But I cared.I care.” I take a shaky breath. “I felt awful about it. It was never the plan to have feelings for you. To like you. To crave hanging out with you. But I did, okay? I fucked everything up because Idid. I really care, Nico. I know it’s too little, too late, and I know you don’t believe me, but everything was real. Besides my name. Besides the fact that I said I was their cousin. Besides the reason why I was with you. Every single thing I said,every singlething I told you, how I was with you, was real.I was real. I was so real with you like I haven’t been with anyone in years. You gave me the freedom to be myself.” I look up at him, the tears spilling over now. “And I’ll be forever grateful for that because you showed me that there still is arealme.”

He doesn’t move, his face a mask of restrained emotion, but his eyes… God, his eyes are killing me.

“I’m so damn sorry. If I could change it, I would. But I can’t. And all I can do is tell you how sorry I am. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I know that. But I still hope…” My voice breaks entirely, my words trailing off.

For a moment, there’s silence. The kind that stretches so long it feels like it’s swallowing you whole. But then Nicholas’s hand lifts to cup my face.

I don’t move. I can’t. My heart is racing, every beat pounding in my ears as his face comes closer until I can feel the faint brush of his breath against my lips. His gaze is locked on mine as if he’s searching for something I don’t even know if I have.

My lips part to suck in a shaky breath. Hope flutters weakly in my chest as if it’s daring to believe he might…

“I still haven’t figured out how to sit across from you and not be madly in love with everything you do while still hating you for it at the same time.” His words knock the air out of my lungs.Fuck.“And until that changes, I can’t accept your apology.”

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