Page 21 of Make Your Save

“There is always help available, Rowan.”

I’m silent for a moment. “If I don’t keep her, what are the options?”

“Adoption,” she says matter-of-factly. Again, there’s no judgement in her expression, but there’s something unreadable that I can’t quite put my finger on.

“Will it fuck her up even more when she finds out both of her parents gave her up?”

Her throat bobs. “I don’t know.”

The question lingers on my tongue and as much as I don’t want to ask it, I know I have to. It’s my fear, the biggest hang-up I have right now.

“What if I fuck her up?”

Her eyebrows tug together, a frown pulling her lips downward as she studies me for a beat. “You’re not going to do that,” she assures me, scooting closer to me. Her arm brushes against me, soft and warm as she turns her head to look at me.

“How can you be so sure?”

“Because you’re a good person, Rowan. You might not think you can handle this, but I know you can. You’re the type of person to help without anyone asking. You’d give the shirt off your back to someone else in need.” She stops, her eyes staring directly through me. “You are good and that’s exactly why I’m so sure.”

Her words sink into my soul as I momentarily losemyself in those hazel eyes. “I don’t know how to do any of this.”

A soft laugh escapes her and she leans her head against the side of my arm. “Most people don’t,” she informs me before letting out a soft breath. “Babies don’t come with instructions. You’re going to fuck up, but you’re not going to fuck her up.” She lifts her head and I immediately feel the absence of her warmth against my bicep. “We will figure this all out together.”

My forehead creases. “We?”

The softest smile lifts her lips. “Did you think I was going to leave you to navigate all this by yourself?”

“I don’t know,” I admit, my shoulders rising and falling. “I don’t expect you to stay and help me.”

Her face momentarily falls, a frown once again taking shape on her mouth, and I want to swipe it away. I want to replace it with that gentle smile again. “Let me help you, Rowan.” She rolls her lips between her teeth, wetting them with her tongue. “I have a few more days left for this travel assignment and then I have a three-month break before I’m supposed to go to California for my next contract.”

My heart skips a beat in my chest. “I can’t ask you to do that, Hadley.” I can’t ask her to spend her three months off work with me and a baby. She has her own life to live, instead of staying and playing happy family with me.

“Lucky for you, you’re not asking me,” she says as that smile reappears once again. “I wasn’t sure what I was going to do with my time off since my lease is up atthe end of the month, so this is perfect. It gives me something to do and I want to help.”

I think over the timeline and honestly, it’s perfect. Depending on playoffs, there’s a little under three months left in the season, so the timing is perfect. If she stays and helps me get adjusted, by the time she has to leave, I’ll have a few months off that I can dedicate just to Lucy.

I’ll have time to figure out what the hell comes next.

“Are you sure?”

She slowly moves her head up and down, a wistful look dancing in her eyes. “I’ve never been more sure.”

I pause as we step back into the living room, glancing around the space as Lucy begins to stir in the bassinet. According to Hadley, it’s time for her to eat again soon. A baby’s schedule is absolutely insane. Now it makes sense why Nash looks so damn tired whenever he comes crawling into our morning skates.

“I think we need some things.”

Hadley glances up at me as she lifts Lucy from the bassinet. She elevates her eyebrows, her mouth twitching. “I think you might be right.”

“Do you have any idea where to start?”

A smile blooms across her lips. “Make her a bottle while I change her diaper?”

I grin. “Deal.” The anxiety from earlier dissipates as I slip into the kitchen to get a bottle ready.

In a time like this, support is exactly what I need. Ababy was never part of my plan, but life hasn’t given me much of a choice now. I know what I have to do and that’s exactly what is going to happen. It’s up to me to make sure this little girl has the best possible life and I’m willing to take on that responsibility.

Hadley is settling back onto the couch with her as I walk back in, bottle in hand. As I sit down on the couch beside her, her eyes meet mine and she begins to move Lucy to me. My heart crawls into my throat and a pang of anxiety strikes my chest, but I shove it away as I hold my little girl. I get her situated in my arms, popping the bottle into her mouth as Hadley pulls out her phone.

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