Page 62 of Make Your Play

“Well, yes,” Sabrina laughs softly, sliding one hand under his head and the other under his body. “We encourage the mom and dad to hold them as soon as they are able to. Skin to skin is best, but you can do that when you get back to the room.” She effortlessly lifts him from the bassinet, moving closer as she lifts him toward me. “Here you go, Dad.”

My eyes widen as I take him from her, not bothering to correct her. My heartbeat is turbulent in my chest. He stirs slightly in his sleep as I tuck him in closer to my body, his head resting along the inside of my elbow. I watch in amazement as his mouth pops open, his jaw stretching as he yawns.

“He’s amazing,” I muse quietly, not sure whether I’m talking to the nurse or myself. I cradle him in my arms and I feel Sabrina squeeze my shoulder before she walks back over to the nurses’ station.

I stand in place, half afraid to move as I stare down at his features. He has Riley’s nose. I push his hat back, just enough to see his almost black hair. I spent months wondering what he would look like and now here he is.

“You came a little earlier than expected, bud,” I tell him, my voice barely audible. “It’s okay, though. You’re safer out here now and so is your mom.” My heart lurches into my throat at the thought of her. “We need her to be good, buddy. We both need her here with us.”

The nurse walks back over to me. “They have a room ready for you guys. I can take you there to wait for your wife.”

“Is she okay?”

She nods, her expression giving nothing away. “She’s still waking up, but they should be bringing her in, in a little while.” She glances at the baby. “Do you guys have a name picked out for him?”

“Not yet,” I tell her, thinking back on the handful of names Riley was stuck on. “We didn’t expect him to be here already.”

“I’m sure you guys will pick the perfect name for the most handsome little man,” she says, her eyes dropping to his face on the last three words. She motions to the bassinet. “Let’s get him back in there and I’ll show you to your room.”

Following her command, I gently lay the baby down, careful to make sure he doesn’t wake up. When I held Posey, she was a few days old. This is the first time that I’ve ever held a baby within their first few hours of life.

Sabrina guides me down the hall, walking along beside me as I push the bassinet. It’s quiet in the postpartum unit, and we’re tucked away in a corner room. The lights are dim as we stepinside, and my throat constricts as I see the empty space where a bed should be. I need to see her. I need to know she’s okay with my own two eyes.

“I recommend doing skin to skin, if you feel comfortable. If you take off your shirt and remove his blanket, just place him on your chest, but I would cover him with the blanket so he doesn’t get cold.” She pauses, pulling a drawer out from the bassinet. “Diapers and wipes are in here. He should be hungry in the next hour or so, so just press the call button when he wakes up and I will bring a bottle by and show you how to feed him.

I stare at her, the overload of information stacking up in my mind. “Wait. That’s it? You’re just going to leave him here with me?”

She laughs softly, a smile pulling on her lips. “Yes. Bonding is extremely important and the two of you need that time. You will be okay and if you need anything, just call.”

“Uh, okay,” I force out the words, feeling less than fucking confident as she disappears from the room, leaving the baby and I alone. I look down at him. “Guess it’s just you and me now, little buddy.”

Pulling my phone out from my pocket, I take a picture of him sleeping peacefully, sending it to my sister, along with a picture of the little card with his birth info.

Nova

Oh my gosh, look at him.

Nash

He’s perfect.

Nova

How is Riley?

Nash

She’s still in recovery but they should be bringing her to the room sometime soon.

I think it will be best if everyone just sees her another day.

Maybe even after we get home.

The last thing I want to do is bombard Riley with a group of people while she’s not feeling well. I know they are family and everyone means well, but she needs time to process. Time to spend with her little boy.

Nova

I agree. She needs some time to recover. I just didn’t want to leave until we knew what was going on.

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