Page 42 of Savage Desire

Standing straight, Juniper shakes her head. Her hair doesn’t move an inch from its coiled position in a bun at the base of her neck. She pushes her glasses up the bridge of her nose. “You're not done yet.”

I sigh, looking around the room in a mixture of disbelief and exhaustion, clawing for an excuse to be finished already. “You have so many candles, it's harder than it looks,” I grumble, noting the fact that there must be over one hundred in here and I've only managed to light four.

She shrugs at me, giving me a pointed look. “I’m waiting for you to work smarter.”

Her words make me pause. Sweat beads over my brows and causes my clothes to cling to my back. Who knew you could sweat from such little movement, and she’s telling me to work smarter?

Yeah, the dislike is growing stronger.

I turn toward her with a glare. “Smarter?” I repeat, and she shrugs, fueling my annoyance. “Why didn't you say that before?” I grumble, still bewildered by whatsmartereven means.

The pointed look on her face is enough to make me wither on the best of days, but not today, not when my magic is heightened to levels I’ve never felt before.

“I’m not here to hold your hand. You need to learn to critically think for yourself,” she states, and I huff.

If that isn't the truth, I don't know it is, but I know a truth that falls hand in hand with that and it hurts; I've never had to do that before, think critically I mean. As if sensing my thoughts, she gives me a tight smile. “I know it's not the norm for you,Polaris. That's why I'm pushing you. Please remember all of this is coming from a place of support and understanding. I've been in your shoes, I've walked the same path, Florentine’s and all.” She pauses, eyes raking over me as she taps at her chin. “Maybe what you need is to feel intense pressure in order to push yourself further.”

I scoff. “I don't need any more pressure than I’m already under.”

If she thinks I’m only dealing with the remnants of being a Florentine then she is truly mistaken because I am sinking in this damn place. On top of the disadvantage I’m at, I’m dealing with wolves that ignite feelings inside of me and vampires that do nothing but cause issues.

It’s been three nights since the wolves’ full moon party, and it’s taken all of my strength to avoid everyone, even those that don’t need avoiding. They’re just simply a by-product of the mess unraveling before me.

Besides, the last time someone tried to put me under pressure to make me push back was Wylder in combat class, and all he made me do was throw sand in his face and run.

It did nothing to make me think clearer, react better, or find a hidden pocket of strength. It just reminded me that I’m a coward.

“Whatever you're thinking, stop it right now,” Juniper blurts, putting a pin in my thoughts. “You stay positive and you stay focused. Just because your mind is thinking it, doesn't mean it's true,” she states, her words of wisdom doing little to break down the disaster that I am.

I opt not to answer, focusing on the candles instead.

Exhaling, I crack my neck in an effort to rid the tension from my shoulders like I’ve watched Wylder do before he fights.

I just need to focus on the candles and not allow any distractions. I promised myself after Tatum dropped me off atthe dorms the other night that I would use all of my energy to grow and be ready for whatever stands in my path, because as infatuated with them as I am, they’re not my key to survival. I am.

“Okay, I can do this,” I say, zeroing in on the next candle as I suck in a sharp breath.

Taking another pinch of sand from my pouch, I run the grains through my fingers, just like she taught me. The room dims in my periphery, only the white wax visible to my gaze.

“You're not working smarter, Polaris,” she states, and I frown, trying to let her words run straight off my back. Before I can mutter the incantation under my breath, words come from her lips.

Confused, I break my stare-off with the inanimate object when a flash flickers in the far right corner of the room, opposite to where I’m standing.

It's a shadow at first, one that makes me falter, one that grows bigger and more recognizable with every breath. When I understand what she's doing, I gasp.

The shadow steps out of the hollows of the dark corner of the room, revealing a familiar face. One I hoped to never see again.

Mrs. Stephens.

Her head sways from side to side as shetsksme. “Polaris, you are a failure.” Her words boom through the space and I panic, taking a step back as I glance around the room, searching for Juniper, but she's gone… nowhere to be seen.

“What the fuck is this?” I blurt, eyes widening as my feet lock in place, watching the woman slowly start toward me.

“When I get my hands on you, I'm finally going to punish you like I've always wanted.” The snarl is a direct match to the woman who haunted me for years, leaving horror coiling in my veins.

Closer and closer she comes, making my palms sweat and my pulse spike as I try to remain calm, but it’s impossible to disguise the fact that I’m flailing desperately under her presence.

She's just a shadow, a reflection of my pain, a nightmare from my past, a memory I can eradicate from my mind if I just focus.

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