Page 97 of Off Season

He nods. “I know you said she was a terrible mother, an alcoholic, and did all kinds of bad shit, but why do you hate her more than Bailey does? What happened to you specifically that didn’t happen to her?”

I’m not in the mood for an inquisition. I look up at him. “Why do you care?”

He stops dancing but continues to keep ahold of me. “Kamryn, in case it’s not clear, I care about you. A lot.”

I shake my head. “I very specifically told you not to fall for me. I’ll never truly be what I was this past week with your family. I was yourfakefiancée, Cruz. It willneverbe real.”

He sighs. “Humor me as some random guy who will someday be one of your many nameless and faceless bedfellows. What happened to you that didn’t happen to Bailey? Does it have something to do with the fact that you don’t sleep well?”

My eyes widen. How does he see me better than anyone else?

Despite my attempt to hold them back, tears immediately blur my vision. Why am I suddenly so emotional? It’s unlike me. I’ve learned to mask my pain throughout the years. It’s probably this damn town making the emotions all bubble at the surface.

He immediately notices and grabs my hand, pulling me out the front door and around the corner until we’re out of sight of any intruding eyes.

He rubs his hand along my face. “Baby, talk to me. Let me in. Let me take some of the pain. I see you, Kamryn Hart. You bottle things up. You don’t always have to play the tough guy. Sometimes it helps to unload. You can trust me. I promise. I’ll never betray your confidence, no matter where we end up.”

“I…I’ve never talked about it before.”

“Not even with Bailey?”

I shake my head and croak out, “I don’t want her to know. Then she’ll be as fucked as me.”

“Know what?”

I don’t know why, but for the first time in my entire life, I unload what I heard that night in the production studio and what I’m confident it meant. How it made me irrevocably hate my mother. How that moment basically ended my childhood. How it’s made me so protective of my sister that it’s become nearly debilitating.

He holds me and lets me cry into his chest. I haven’t sobbed about that night in over a decade. I can’t believe how good it feels to both tell someone and to emote over it. It’s like some of the toxicity is leaving me.

We must stand out there for over half an hour. He simply consoles me and whispers assurances to me. Obviously my sister has always been a bit of a caretaker to me, but that’s different. Cheetah is giving me support that I’ve never considered letting anyone give me.

I eventually pull my head away and look into his face for some reaction. “Do you believe me? Do you think I’m crazy?”

He lovingly rubs my tears from my face. “I think you’re the strongest person I’ve ever met. You’re amazing, Kamryn Hart. Don’t ever consider otherwise.”

“Everyone thinks I have a screw loose, me included.”

“I don’t agree. I think you’re perfect just the way you are.”

I wipe a few of my tears, not wanting to ruin his New Year’s Eve more than I already have. “We should go inside.”

“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”

“I don’t want to be sad. I want to be happy. The ball is going to drop soon.”

He winks at me. “I’d rather watch your pants drop.”

I giggle as I clear away the last of my tears and grab his hand. “Let’s go back inside. It’s almost midnight. I might make you go down on me at midnight in the middle of the bar. I haven’t called in your debt to me yet today.”

CHEETAH

That was a big moment for Kamryn. I understand her damage a lot better now. I certainly understand her constant need to protect Bailey. I used to think it was overbearing, but now I think it’s endearing. I’m also better grasping her deep-rooted hatred for her mother. It’s hard to imagine a mother acting like hers. I’m suddenly feeling grateful for my over-intrusive mother who does it because she loves and cares about me so much.

I send her a quick text to wish her a happy new year and to tell her how much I love and appreciate her.

Before Kam’s moment outside, she and I were having a pretty chill night. We’ve had a few drinks, a few laughs, and a few dances. There were two men at the bar earlier who Kam apparently hustled in poker when she was just a kid. That doesn’t surprise me in the least. They were happy to see her but didn’t mention her mother’s passing. I wonder if it’s because they don’t know she passed or know how Kam feels about her. I suspect it’s the latter.

As soon as we walk back into the bar, Kam stops short. An attractive blonde woman’s eyes widen when she turns from her seat at the bar and sees us walk in. “Kamryn Hart. Wow. I never thought I’d see you back in this town.”