Page 137 of Off Season

“Who got wet first?” Cheetah asks while trying to hold in his laughter as we sit naked in his living room fort, eating dark chocolate-covered pineapples, our new favorite treat. It’s our compromise since I got him to admit he hates the fondue restaurant that I love. He said if he wanted to cook, he’d stay home and do it himself. Given that we both like pineapples and I like dark chocolate, we made our own fondue treats for our middle-of-the-night forts.

I smile as I lick my fingers clean of the chocolate. “Bridget. I felt a little bad for her. She was so embarrassed.”

Cheetah is well into his season. He’s having a great year. His speed is better than it’s been in a few years, and he leads the league in stolen bases. I go to as many games as I can. I get the honor of his seventh-inning stretch dances every few weeks, but we’re waiting a little longer to do our choreographed dance so that it’sperfected.

After much begging, Ms. Rylee agreed to be our teacher for this specific dance. We had to promise no more mid-session orgasms. It hasn’t been easy. For some reason, the dance lessons get us both worked up.

Our Anacondas team practices are well underway, and our season is about to start. The team looks good, and because Ripley gave birth early, she hopes she’ll be ready for opening day. We initially assumed we wouldn’t have her until mid-season, if at all.

She moved back to town with Quincy and their daughter, Kaya, who has red hair and blue eyes just like her mom. Everyone fawns all over her. Everyone except me.

June moved back with them so she can help care for Kaya and train Ripley. Ilovehaving Mama June in town. She’s a constant source of amusement. I’m headed over to Quincy’s house later this week for a girls’ day by the pool while the guys head out of town for a road trip.

When I’m not with Bailey or at softball, I’m with Cheetah. I wish it was more often, but I can tell that my sister’s defenses are breaking when it comes to Tanner Montgomery, so I try not to leave her side very often.

They practically stare at each other with googly eyes at Harper’s games. It’s only a matter of time before she starts fucking him again. I think it’s time for me to educate her on the real rules of casual sex, though I’m not doing a good job of it myself these days.

The beginning of our practices is my favorite time of year because they mean one thing. Rookie hazing.

As it turns out, the guys do it too, but they’re totally different from us. Cheetah and I are trading hazing war stories in the comforting confines of his nudist fort after an evening of crazy fucking, something we’ve been doing a lot since his return from Spring Training.

Cheetah nods. “Which one is Bridget?”

“The tall brunette. She plays first base for us.”

“Oh right.” He shakes his head. “I can’t believe you make therookies sit naked on running washing machines and wait to see who gets wet first. How can you tell if they’re wet, other than the obvious touch test?”

I smile. “Paper towels. You can see them start to saturate. It’s classic,” I giggle.

“Did you have to do it your rookie year?” he asks.

I nod. “Yep. I was wet before they even turned on the machines and proudly admitted as much.”

He chuckles. “Was it seeing the other women naked?”

I wiggle my eyebrows. “Sure was.”

“We do something similar. We make the guys stand naked and watch weird porn to see who gets hard first. Like bestiality or some crazy shit like that.”

I giggle. “Classic. What else?”

He twists his lips. “There’s the always-present elephant walk.”

“Obviously.” That’s when the rookies all have to walk in a circle for a certain amount of time, holding each other’s dicks. That’s a longtime legend, and everyone knows it’s done.

His eyes widen with excitement. “We did a new one this year in Florida. We dumped several jars of rainbow jimmies on the ground. Then we covered all the rookies’ hands in maple syrup and told them they had to sort the jimmies by color.” He lets out a laugh. “It took them all fucking night.”

“Ooh, that’s a good one. Maybe we’ll use that. Give me another.”

“Hmm. They have to attend their first practice of the season with a potato in their asses. Not all the way in but sitting nestled between their cheeks. All the veterans walk around spanking them and watch them wince.”

I scrunch my face. “Ouch. It must be hard to play with a potato in their ass.”

The corners of his mouth raise in amusement. “Some handle it better than others.”

I let out a laugh. “I bet.”

“Oh, you’ll like this one. We tell the guys it’s an ice cream speed-eating contest. They each have to gobble down a full gallon. When it’s over, we tell them that we first melted the gallons, jerked off into them, and then refroze them. We don’t actually do that, but they think we do.” He starts hysterically laughing. “Most of them puke.” He grabs his stomach in laughter. “Shit, it’s so funny when you see their faces as realization hits them.”

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