Page 44 of North

“Yeah.” I felt it too.

“Double shifts in the infirmary were not a good idea.”

“I tried to sleep…”

“But?”

“Nightmares.” I scrubbed a hand over my face. “I don’t get them much anymore, but every now and then, one sneaks up on me.”

“I’m sorry. I guess rescuing those boys stirred things up, and news of all these missing people.”

I grunted. “No, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to come here. I just ended up on your doorstep.” I sipped again. “The last thing you need are my problems.”

“Shush.”

She moved behind me, then I felt small hands on my shoulders, and it almost made me jump.

“You’re so tense. You need to relax, or you’ll snap.” She started massaging, her fingers digging into my tight muscles. It felt good and my head fell forward. She kneaded harder.

I groaned.

“Just let it go for a little while,” she murmured.

I closed my eyes, and Jess filled my senses. The sweet, shower-fresh smell of her, the feel of her hands, the sound of her dress rustling.

She was good, smart, nice, real. Alive.

Much better than blood, grief, and old memories that never left me alone.

“There you go,” she murmured.

“I wanted to save Drew. He was just a frightened kid.” Dammit, I hadn’t meant to let the words out.

Her fingers paused for a second, then resumed massaging. “I haven’t known you long, but I have no doubt you did everything you could.”

“He looked a bit like me.” I closed my eyes tighter. “I wished he didn’t die.”

“I know. But you don’t get to decide when it’s someone’s time to go. We can only try our best, North. No one can do more than that. You need to stop beating yourself up for something that was out of your control.”

She stopped massaging and stepped in front of me. She was so damn pretty. Her dark hair was loose, and the freckles on her nose stood out. I wanted to count them all.

“I know,” I said. “Most days, I know that. But sometimes…”

“Sometimes the crap we keep hidden likes to pop up and smack us in the face.”

I nodded. “Thanks. I should get out of your way.”

“No, it seems that I like you in my way.”

I lifted my head.

She smiled, then reached up for the thin straps of her dress. She pushed them off her shoulders.

The dress slithered down her body and pooled at her feet, leaving her naked except for a tiny pair of white panties.

“I think you should stay,” she murmured.

Jess

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