Page 23 of Derick

“I just wanted to hold you and tell you how proud I am of everything you’ve done,” she said. “I’ve been a therapist for almost twenty years, and what you endured, and how you are with your daughter, and what you did to protect and save others is beyond amazing. There is one question I haven’t asked you, and I know the other therapists didn’t either. Why didn’t you ever leave?”

“I…I…” Letting go of her hand, I furrowed my brows and chewed on my bottom lip. I didn’t have a reason why, or one I could think of, I never really thought of it. Well, I had, but I hadn’t wanted to leave Toby.

“I think I’ve given you way too much to think on. I know you can handle it. I’m confident we can move your weekly sessionto once a month. I want you to think about what I’ve asked you. I look forward to hearing how TAFE is. I have faith that you’ll make lots of new friends. If you need to talk, you have my number, but I believe in you.”

Dr. Heather stood and I gazed up at her, numb at what she’d not only just asked me to do, but what she felt about me. I nibbled on my bottom lip and didn’t even try to talk, just nodded.

This school was way tooposh. It was so far out of my price range. I cringed when they showed me the brochure. I wanted Hope to be more social with children her own age, so I was checking out daycare. Derick’s parents had offered to look after her while I was at TAFE all the time, but I was doing full courses and didn’t want to impose on them. They loved Hope and convinced me they would love to take care of her. I told them they didn’t have to look after my child and should enjoy their free time together, but in the end, they convinced me, and we’d agreed they’d have Hope three of the five days. So now we were looking at daycare centers to find the right one for two days.

Derick’s parents only wanted the best for Hope, and I knew that. There was no doubt, and I felt the same, but over the last couple of months it just felt like my life had gone from the slow lane to the fast one with everything changing.

This daycare was beautiful. Everything was top-of-the-line. The career-to-child ratio was small. I liked that the most, but I didn’t like what it would cost me to have Hope go here. The Silvermans had offered to pay, but I already felt like I was taking advantage of them with all they’d done for me and Hope.

“What days do you have available?” I knew how hard it was to get a good daycare that wasn’t booked out or had a waiting list a mile long, especially one this good.

The woman’s smile didn’t budge, but she blinked twice. “You may choose any of the five. The Silverman family own this center.”

Evelin and Derick shrugged and smiled, like owning an exclusive, top-of-the-line, private daycare was nothing.

Raising my brow, I chewed on my bottom lip as I debated what days I should choose. I wasn’t even going to argue about Hope going to this preschool, because I wanted the best for my daughter, and truthfully, I was learning with things like this it was easier to choose my battles.

Derick came to my side and took my hand in his. This was about as much contact as he gave me besides kissing here or there, and sometimes holding and hugging me. Oh, and a time or two I’d been on his lap. I craved more though.

“When I go back to university, my short days are Monday and Thursday. Tuesday and Wednesday are my long days. So, I say we have those two days?” Derick suggested.

Raising my brow, I shook my head. Hope was my daughter. I may allow Derick to call Hope his daughter, and he just might be her favorite right now, but I’d given birth to her. It had been just the two of us from the moment I knew she was growing inside me.

“No. Can I get back to you once I have my TAFE schedule?” I asked the woman.

“Sure. You’re a Silverman. You can take as long as you need.” The daycare center director smiled at me, but I couldn’t miss the envy in her gaze. I had seen that look between some of my father’s men and the women, but it had never been directed at me. I wasn’t sure how I felt about it.

Derick

Ruby was starting TAFE tomorrow.I needed to have a talk with her about security and assure her she could call me anytime.

Ruby sat on the sofa by the window with a book in her hand, but she wasn’t reading it. She gazed out at Hope playing with the puppy my parents had gotten for her. Sitting next to her, I resisted the urge to stroke her back, still unsure about how to touch her because of all she’d been through. She hadn’t rejected my touch yet though, and she was becoming bolder, touching me here and there.

“Precious, I need to talk to you about tomorrow. I’m sure you’ve seen the protection we always have with us and that both you and Hope have bodyguards?” Ruby darted her eyes my way as she nodded. “You will have to have them at TAFE with you.”

“The two bodyguards I have now will be going to TAFE with me?” She stood and moved to the French doors that were open and stepped outside. “I don’t want them there. I want to make friends. They’ll bring to much attention to me.” Ruby hugged herself.

Going to her, I gave in to my desire to touch her and gather her into my embrace. I watched as Hope went after Sunny—what she called her dog—and her guards followed. She would be fine with them while I talked with her mother.

“They will not be in plain sight,” I told her. “It will not just be the two you’re used to either. You will have a team. I want you to meet them all tomorrow morning before you go. I need you toknow who to go to if you need help and if you do spot them not to get scared.”

I tilted her chin up so she looked into my eyes. She nibbled on her bottom lip and shook her head. “I don’t need a team. I’m not a Silverman. I don’t want attention on me. Please. I’ve never had real friends before. No one has recognized me, so I want to be me.”

There was no way I was taking any chance with Ruby’s protection. She was part of the reason her family and the biker gang were all in jail, on the run, or dead. I knew that if her family could get to her, they would. The Devil’s Queens had been quiet, but we had underestimated them before, and I would never do that again. I would never let them get their hands on Ruby or Hope ever again.

Caressing her cheek, I leaned down and brushed my lips over hers. “You are a Silverman. You’re mine.” I groaned as I tried to think of a better way to explain to her. “You are important to me. I want you to be happy. I want you to make friends. I need you to know though, you mean more to me than anyone. I need you safe. I can’t—no, I won’t live without you.”

Ruby wiggled out of my embrace. I really didn’t like how she looked at me. Her hands rubbed her arms, and one of her brows was raised as her lips turned down. Her gaze seemed to search my face, and I wished for a moment I could read minds when she sighed and took another step away from me.

“Yes, you can live without me. No, I’m not a Silverman. You can say that as much as you want, but...” She shook her head like she was trying to clear it. “I have survived eighteen years basically by myself. I just…I just… Argh, I may not be a woman of the world, Derick, but I know one thing…” She closed her eyes as she trailed off, then snapped them open with a grimace. “Okay. Look, don’t worry, I understand. I’ll meet the other guards.”

Something had just happened, and I had a feeling that whatever she just saw in me or just came to realize wasn’t good for me. I was proud of her though. I knew for her to say no and stick up for herself, it was a big thing with how she’d been raised.

Ruby

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