Page 2 of April

Asher shook her head, trying to figure out what to do here. She’d never had a bride talk to her quite like this before, and Asher wanted to pick her up, toss her in a shower, dress and all, and make her walk down the aisle in a sopping wet dress, with mascara running down her cheeks.

“Anyway, she made me come, like, five times before I left. I think he’s done that in the whole four years I’ve been with him.”

“Well, maybe you should talk to him about thisafterthe wedding.”

“Are you into women?” the bride asked.

“What?” Asher asked back.

“It’s just that I didn’t have a last-second fuck. I’m sure he did. He doesn’t think I know about Carey, and I’m sure there was someone at his bachelor party. His brother hired women, not strippers, if you know what I mean. And they don’t think I know that, either. If I’m going to do it with someone before the wedding, might as well be with a woman who can get me there, you know?”

“You’re drunk, so I think it’s best that we get you cleaned up. I’ll get you some water and coffee, and maybe some medicine, too. Then, with a clear head, you can–”

“You’re hot,” the bride stated, interrupting her. “I’ve always thought so. When my dad found your company online, I thought you looked hot in the picture. I’ll touch you, too, if you want,” she added. “I don’t want to go down on you, though, if that’s okay. Just, like, fingers.”

Asher had never been propositioned by a client before, and definitely not quite like this. She was certain that if this woman wasn’t drunk, she wouldn’t be saying these things, but even her grooms hadn’t propositioned her over the years. Members of the wedding party, yes, but they weren’t clients.

“I have a better idea. Let’s get you married, okay?” she said as she stood. “I think we should take off the dress because you’ll mess it up when you wash your face. I’ll get the makeup artist back in here with the hair person.”

“I don’t love him,” the bride told her, closing her eyes. “He’s been my boyfriend since college, but I’m not even sure why we’re getting married. He proposed. I said yes. Now, we are here, but I don’t really know why.”

“Do you want me to get him in here so that you two can talk?”

“What’s the point? There are three hundred people out there. It’s not like I’m going to run away or anything. I’d embarrass my family.”

“I’m sure they’d understand.”

“They wouldn’t. He’s the heir to a Fortune 100 company and millions. I was raised to marry a man like him.” The woman stood up, seemingly preparing herself for something, and was a little wobbly on her feet. “Okay. I’m ready. Let’s do this.”

“Oh, you need to–”

“Pee. God, I need to pee so bad.”

“Take off the–”

Before Asher could finish her sentence, the bride lowered the side zipper of her dress, and it fell to the floor, leaving her in only white lingerie. The woman then disappeared into the bathroom, and Asher rushed to pick the dress up off the floor and hung it up to prevent it from wrinkling.

“What’s going on in there?” the assistant asked into her headset.

“I’ve got a situation,” Asher replied. “I don’t want it on comms. Can you come in here, please?”

For big weddings like this, the team wore headsets and communicated through them, but there was always a chance someone from the wedding would overhear, so she’d texted the assistant before to avoid that. A moment later, the door opened, and the assistant walked in.

“She’s drunk,” Asher said. “We need at least thirty.”

“I’ll let the chef know not to start cooking.”

“And maybe get her mom in here. I don’t know what else to do. She’s drunk and pouring her heart out to me, but maybe her mom can help.”

“You’ve met her mother… Do you really think she’s going to help?”

Asher sighed and said, “No. You’re right. Okay. Get me hair and makeup, and then come back in and steam the dress again. I need to talk to the groom to calm him down.”

“He’s in the room, still waiting. I just checked. He and the groomsmen are drinking and having fun. I’m not even sure he’s noticed it’s time to start the ceremony yet.”

“Jesus,” Asher said to herself. “Skip the mom. I’ll get the groom ready. Get hair and makeup. Steam the dress.”

“And tell the chef?”

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