Page 30 of The Summer House

Mandy swirled the wine in her glass, watching the ruby-colored liquid catch and release light. She and Rick had returned Eva to Daisy, then they’d driven to the hotel and checked in. The separate bedrooms he’d promised turned out to be part of the same suite, but she hadn’t protested. In her current state—with her mind confused and tipping and unable to grasp even the most basic of concepts—protesting about rooms was completely beyond her.

She didn’t know what to do—about Rick, about Eva, about her life. Three weeks ago everything had been so clear. She had plans for the future and definite ideas about the past. Now all that had changed, leaving her out of sorts.

“What are you thinking about?” Rick asked.

She shrugged rather than answer. She couldn’t tell himeverythingthat was on her mind. At least not the part about him. As to the rest of it…

“Eva mostly. Today was great.”

“I thought so.”

She leaned toward him, taking in the dark hair, the deep blue eyes, the easy smile. “You were wonderful with her.” She held up a hand before he could speak. “I know you weren’t trying especially hard or doing anything out of the ordinary. That’s what makes it so special.”

He frowned. “I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about, but thanks, anyway.”

“You’re welcome.” She sighed. “Eva had a good time, too, which is what I wanted. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her so happy and comfortable. Usually she takes time to warm up to strangers, but not today.”

“Then why are you sad?”

“I’m not sad, exactly. More wistful.”

“That’s a subtlety you’ll have to explain.”

She gave him a quick smile. “Fair enough. I’ve been thinking about Eva and whether or not I have what it takes to adopt her. I work with children like her all the time, but that’s very different from being responsible for them. I’ve never had a child. What if I do everything wrong? What if I make her life worse?”

He reached across their small table and touched her hand. “Sometimes you have to lead with your heart.”

“You think?”

“I’m sure of it. What every child needs is to be loved unconditionally. To know his or her world is safe. To have the freedom to grow and learn and be. Everything else is gravy.”

Mandy stared at him in surprise. “For someone who talks about people in terms of experiments and elements, that’s pretty insightful.”

“I’m a deep kind of guy.” He squeezed her fingers, then released her hand. “Seriously, I’ve learned a thing or two in the past few years, and one of them is that once the heart is involved, there are plenty of things that can’t be explained. Every now and then, we all have to take it on faith. That includes loving and being loved.”

He smiled. “Eva’s a special little girl. I can see why you want to adopt her. She cries out for a family of her own, which is what you always wanted. You couldn’t give it to yourself, but youcangive it to her. Does rewriting the past make the situation more appealing to you? Probably. Does that matter? I doubt it.”

Mandy stared at him openmouthed. She couldn’t believe it. In five seconds, with a few simple sentences, Rick had just explained her relationship with Eva and clarified her—until now—undefined feelings of longings.

Shehadalways longed for a family of her own. Her father loved her very much, but he was usually running off to make a movie somewhere. She’d grown up mostly alone. When it had become clear that her father wasn’t going to remarry and provide her with the home and family she’d always wanted, she made friends with girls who had families in place, then got involved with them.

Now, all these years later, was she really trying to make up for that by giving Eva a family? It made sense. And as Rick had said—it didn’t much matter. As long as she was willing to make the commitment to take on this child.

“Ten points for your team,” she said slowly. “Like I said. Insightful.”

“I’ve come to know you in the past couple of weeks,” he told her. “Which is funny, because I would have said I knew you before.” He shook his head. “I didn’t at all. I see that now. I saw what I wanted to see. Now I can see the real you.”

“There’s a scary thought.” She sipped her wine. “I’ll agree with you. I didn’t know you all that well before, either. Actually I didn’t get men at all. It took me a while to realize that I wasn’t looking for a flesh-and-blood male to share my life. Instead I wanted some handsome prince from a fairy story to rescue me from my life and sweep me away. I wanted to be the princess—worshiped rather than loved.”

“Your own personal pedestal?” he asked, his voice low and teasing.

“Something like that. I even found a few guys interested in the same fantasy.”

“What happened?”

“Life on a pedestal isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. When a man treats a woman like a princess, there isn’t much room left for real life. There certainly isn’t any room for a child like Eva. I found out I was much happier on solid ground.”

“Sounds like a good lesson. Similar to what I learned about wanting a real flesh-and-blood woman and not some perfect robot.”

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