Page 24 of The Summer House

“Sure, but the marriage was already pretty much over.”

Amazing. After all this time, he was trying to spare her feelings. She didn’t know what that meant. Especially when she’d been the one to cheat.

“I was so angry,” she said, almost unable to stop herself from telling the truth, maybe for the first time ever. “After I saw you with that grad student, I was furious. I went to the airport and got on the first plane back to L.A. By the time I got to my dad’s it was nine or ten at night. I don’t remember. There was a party.” She swallowed. “Back then there was always a party.”

She could remember walking into his spacious Beverly Hills mansion. People spilled out of every room. Most of them were drunk, or on their way to being so. By then Mandy had calmed down enough to feel pain, as well as rage. It was as if someone had played handball with her heart. She hated Rick and longed for him in equal measures.

Her father had listened, held her and told her it would be okay. But then he’d been called away and someone had pressed a drink in her hand.

“I hadn’t eaten,” she said. “I’d spent the whole plane trip crying. The liquor hit me.” She shrugged. “That’s a pretty pitiful excuse.”

She’d been sitting alone in a corner when some up-and-coming young male star had found her. They’d talked for a while. She couldn’t remember about what. She could barely remember his name or what he’d looked like.

“He offered and I said yes. Because I wanted to hurt you.” She squeezed her eyes shut. “It was horrible. I’d never done anything like that before. Had sex with a stranger. It’s not the fun and happy good time it’s cracked up to be. You walked in on us the next morning.”

Rick’s expression turned haunted. Mandy ached for both of them. She could still remember the sun piercing her eyes as she wrestled with a hangover the size of Montana. She’d barely made it to the bathroom before throwing up. When she’d staggered back to her bed, she’d been stunned to find a guy in it.

All the memories of the previous night had crashed in on her. Then, before she could make sense of them, Rick had walked into her room. It had been the only time he hadn’t let her go.

No matter how long she lived, she would never forget the look on his face.

“I never said I was sorry,” she whispered. “I was, from the very first, and I still am. It was selfish and stupid and incredibly immature.”

He shrugged. “I knew why you’d done it. I’d caused you pain for so long.”

His excusing her behavior stunned her. “So it didn’t matter?”

His eyes darkened. “It mattered.”

“Oh, Rick. What a mess.”

He nodded. “I couldn’t be what you wanted, what you needed.”

“I had the same problem,” she admitted. “You wanted the perfect social hostess, housekeeper and mistress. I was twenty and didn’t know anything about being married.”

He straightened. “You know, I’ve yet to find that perfect combination. I wonder why that is.”

“It doesn’t exist.” She sucked in a breath. Some of the pain inside her eased a little. “Maybe you should try inventing a robot.”

“That was my first plan. Instead I’ve been trying to change my requirements to something more realistic. I think I would be happier with an imperfect flesh-and-blood partner rather than a perfect machine. Besides, I’m hardly Mr. Wonderful.”

“You have your moments,” she said, even though her chest felt as if a thousand pounds were pressing in on it.

What was wrong with her? She should be happy that Rick had reached the place in his life where he was ready to be in a serious relationship. Didn’t she want him to get married again?

She told herself she did, that she wasn’t envious of the woman who would be lucky enough to claim him. She, Mandy, had already had her shot and she’d blown it. Besides, it wasn’t as if she had feelings for him. Not after all this time.

She cleared her throat. “So what are your current requirements?”

“The usual. A wife. Kids. Maybe a couple of dogs. My work can be difficult. It’s generally challenging. I want to have something more to come home to than an empty house. More balance.”

“We’ve been using the ‘b’ word a lot today,” she told him.

“You’re right. Has it just been today?” He shook his head. “Feels like a lot longer to me.”

To her, too, but it had just been the one day.

“How long until Cassie joins you?” he asked.

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