Page 60 of Clean Out of Luck

“I ended up sandwiched between two chairs and couldn’t hit any of the buttons. I was stuck riding up and down in the elevator until someone stopped it.”

“I wish I’d been there.”

“I’m sure you do,” he says flatly as he pretends to shake out some grime from the net. Instead, he flings some cold drops of water toward me.

“Hey, now! It’s not my fault!”

“You laughed,” he says with a smile.

I grin back. “Did anyone get pictures of this big event?”

“It better not be plastered on the parlor wall in the morning, that’s for dang sure.”

“Yoohoo! I’m ready!” Gloria calls from behind me. I’m not sure what she’s wearing, but Steve has been stunned into silence.

I sit up and peer over the back of the lounge chair. Gloria makes her way toward us—in her string bikini and a thong.

What a brave woman. I couldn’t do it. But I’m glad she’s comfortable enough. Besides, she’s bright enough to need all the sun she can get.

She’s practically glowing fluorescent.

“I just remembered some paperwork I need to finish,” Steve mutters as he tosses the cleaning net down and practically sprints back inside The Serendipity.

“Good idea to get a little vitamin D today. You’ve been looking a little pale,” Gloria tells me as she sits down in the chair next to me, making me immediately look tanner.

“I’m glad you came out. How’s life at your altitude?” I ask. It’s our little joke since Gloria lives all the way up on the third floor.

“It’s been going great! I bought something for you and my neighbor Phoebe. Have you met her yet?”

“No, I haven’t, but you mentioned her the last time I saw you,” I reply.

“Yes, well, I know both you girls like to read, so I got you a little something.” Gloria passes me a book. “I think you might want to read this. I read it in two days. I noticed youread a lot of history, and even though this is very different, I thought it might interest you.”

She sits down on the chair next to me and passes me the book. I look at the cover. It is not a history book. It’s not literary fiction. In fact, it looks like a fantasy. It reminds me of the book I saw at Novel Notions on the horrid date. I wish I had bought that book and ditched him. I smile at her and say, “This looks great, Gloria. Thank you for thinking of me.”

“Read it, and then we’ll talk about it when you’re done. I’d like to know your favorite parts. I need to talk to somebody about this book. No one else has read it.”

I smile and crack open the book to read the blurb on the inside cover. There’s lots of yearning and moaning even in the blurb. I’m not sure this is the book for me, but I’m going to give it a try.

After reading for only a few minutes, I’m interrupted by my ringing phone. I make note of my place in the book—chapter seven already. Gloria was right—it’s definitely engrossing.

When I pick up my phone, I see that it’s my mom on a video call. I take the call, and both my parents’ faces fill the screen.

“Hi, honey,” Mom says as she waves. “How are you doing?”

“Is it sunny at home?” Dad asks, his forehead looming closer. I don’t think he has a good understanding of camera angles.

I flip the screen around so that they can see that I’m lying on a chair in the courtyard. I point the phone at the sky so they can see the glaring sun against a bright blue background. “I bet you it’s even warmer than where you are!” I say with a laugh. I flip the phone back around so they can see me.

Dad pokes his face in front of the screen and points to his forehead. “Do you see this? I am sweating. I’ve been sweating ever since we stepped off the plane. I’m beginning to thinkI’m going to turn into a raisin down here. I thought it was supposed to be humid and that that would keep me moisturized, but now I just can’t tell if I’m sweating or swimming.”

“We get humid a little bit here. It can’t be that bad.”

His eyes bulge as he says, “Trust me. It’s that bad.”

We chat for a little while, and I catch up on all the news about Grandma and what they’ve been doing there, about the Everglades tour where Dad accidentally dropped his phone in the swamp, and then Mom tried to catch it and fell in—and there was a gator. And then they swore they would never go to a swamp again. But then they replaced the phone, and now they’re calling to make sure it works.

It’s a heck of a story, and the two of them are giggling like two guilty middle schoolers. It’s adorable.

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