Page 67 of Capitol Matters

I wasted a scowl on his back. “I’m being serious.”

He paused and looked back to meet me with an even stare. “I’m not laughing.”

Sighing, I wandered down the length of the nearest table, peering into microscopes and sniffing the fumes that rose from a beaker.

“Yeah well, when I told Grimm he made me this way, he said I was a mistake.” My nose wrinkled, and not from the chemicals. “So, that’s in my head now.”

Added to Holland’s emotional outpouring about what a charming person I used to be, and how sad it made her to see me changed. Change was an unavoidable truth, but my transformation was more dramatic than most, and it was more easily blamed on the man who had ruled my life for the last twelve years.

Nash’s ginger head bobbed as he spun away from the cabinet, his arms laden with large, opaque jugs. He set them on the ground with successive thuds.

“It’s true, though,” he said. “Grimmdidmake you. He made you what a leader wants in his followers: submissive and compliant.”

I huffed a breath and bent over the table, leaning near the flame that danced beneath a glass boiling flask. “More like he terrorized me as a kid, and I can’t fucking shake it.”

Reaching toward the fire, I waved my fingers through it. Quickly at first, then slowing until each digit lingered long enough for the heat to singe my skin.

Nash stepped forward to crank the gas valve at the base of the burner, turning the flame off. When I shot him a narrow-eyed glare, he responded with a stern look of his own.

“Same end result,” he said. “You’re loyal.”

“And unreliable. Irresponsible. Untrustworthy…” I ticked off the list, ending with a bitter laugh. “Grimm’s probably wondering why he puts up withmyshit.”

Gripping the edge of the table, I stared down at my knuckles going tense and white.

“I’m stronger than him,” I continued. “He can’t hurt me anymore. Wouldn’t dare. And sometimes I think my life would be so much better if I just…” I relaxed my grip enough to raise one hand. The sharp snap of my fingers echoed in the otherwise quiet room.

“But instead, it’s days later and I’m pissed off because he’s disappointed in me.” I scoffed. “Fuck him.”

Nash came around behind me and braced his arms on either side of mine. The warmth of his body brought comfort, and I sank back into him. His beard brushed the side of my face as he bent in to kiss my cheek.

Mentally grabbing his wrists, I pulled them around my chest and tucked myself into a tight embrace. Nash chuckled and took over, squeezing hard enough that it hurt in the best possible way.

I emptied my lungs, relishing the moment of vacancy. Nothing came in or out. No words, no air, no thoughts. It was an acceptable silence.

“You all right?” Nash asked at length.

“I don’t wanna believe all the best parts of my life are behind me,” I said softly. “It makes the future feelimpossible.”

My head rested against his shoulder as he murmured, “All past or all future doesn’t leave much room for the present.”

My gaze angled to the containers he’d set on the ground. Jugs of caustic fluid waited to render Sleeping Beauty’s body into primordial goo.

“I’m in the present,” I said flatly. “I hate it here. I hatemehere.”

Nash’s arms tensed. “I’m rather partial to you here.”

“You might be the only one.”

Extricating myself from his embrace, I faced the stoneware jugs that looked like something moonshiners might use to store their brew.

“That it?” I gestured toward them.

Turning as well, Nash exhaled loudly. “That should do it, yeah.”

Without another word, I bent to grab the nearest one. I tucked it into the crook of my elbow and reached for the next when Nash’s hand grazed my shoulder. I glanced back to find his expression rife with sympathy.

“Let me handle this,” he said. “You’ve done enough.”

---