Page 16 of Bleed for Me

“Archer…” Seven trailed off in a hesitant tone as if he could already sense where my train of thought was heading.

“I’ll catch you later.” Was my only reply before I started down the hallway and slipped into the room I’d just seen her enter.

FIVE

ROSALIE

“Ring around the rosie, a pocket full of posies, ashes, ashes, we all fall down.”

Daisy giggled as she gripped my hands, allowing me to turn her in a circle as we moved across the backyard. Her blonde hair flew behind her, getting caught in the wind as we spun. The song echoed around us and I laughed, warmed by how much she enjoyed this.

But then…the sun fell, replaced by the moon. When I turned away from it, confusion burrowing deep inside me, Daisy’s white dress was covered in blood, a gash across her throat as she stood, staring at me with betrayal dancing within them.

“You did this, Rosie,” she accused. “Why did you hurt me?”

Panic pierced through my chest, and I stumbled backwards, glancing down at my hands that were now covered in blood, too. In my palm sat the knife I’d used, fear skittering along my veins.

“I..I didn’t mean to. It was an accident.”

Daisy tilted her head to the side. “Are you sure about that?” Her voice got caught on the wind and the breeze blew it around me, her voice echoing on repeat.

I cupped my hands over my ears, tears streaming down my face. “It was an accident, it was an accident, it was an accident,” I chanted under my breath continuously, creating a chant of my own. “Ring around the rosie, a pocket full of posies—” A sob wrenched from my throat.

I shot up in bed, my heart beating a mile a minute. A chill swept down my spine as Dr. Blake’s words echoed around my mind. He said that I’d killed her, and something in his tone resonated deep within my subconscious. He was right. I remembered. Somehow, during our fight, I’d been the one who ended up on top of Gentry. It had beenmeswinging the knife around. It might have been an accident, but she died by my hand.

Hot tears burned my skin and blurred my vision. I didn’t even think it could get any worse than it had, but it did. She trusted me so completely, so blindly, and I took that trust and took her life along with it.

I didn’t have much time to dwell on my most recent nightmare because a knock sounded at the door, followed by it opening with a creak. It was sad that I was starting to look forward to these interactions. As anticipated, it was Gloria who poked her head in the room. She’s been the only staff member that I’ve had to interact with so far. It wasn’t that I minded her company, it was just repetitive.

Her smile was more relaxed when she entered, carrying a tray of food that housed a cup of something on top. The different smells wafted through the air, making my stomach grumble with hunger.

“I didn’t wake you, did I?” she asked.

I bit my lower lip, the events from my most recent dream spiraling through my head. “No.” Was my only reply. She moved forward, placing the tray at the foot of my bed and took a step backwards.

“I know this isn’t easy,” she said suddenly, catching me off guard. Everyone seemed to walk on eggshells around us, seemingly scared of saying the wrong thing. It made sense. It just didn’t feel good. When I continued to just stare at her, unsure of what to say, she continued. “I overheard your conversation with Dr. Blake yesterday,” she explained. “The way you spoke about…” she trailed off, grimacing like she knew she probably overstepped.

Considering where we were, I didn’t fault her for that. Had she mentioned it to someone with schizophrenia, psychosis, or another type of mind-altering disease similar, then she might have received a reaction she wasn’t hoping for.

“I’m not going to attack you for simply talking to me. It wasn’t like I snapped and killed her. It was an accident. I remember now.” My gaze fell to my hands, knots forming in the depths of my stomach. “She got in the way and as I drew the blade out to stab him…it got her. I’m not saying I’m completely normal, but I’m not crazy either.”

Gloria’s expression softened, a series of emotions flashing across her face. For once, it felt like somebody believed me. As hungry as I was, it didn’t feel right to eat while having this conversation, especially when the thought of Daisy never being able to eat again slithered through my thoughts. She would have liked the food here.

“What are your hobbies?” she pressed, changing the subject. “We have a variety of different things that we offer here. Maybe you could sign up for some classes in one of our programs.”

I contemplated that for a moment. If my willingness to be more involved with this place got me out of this room more,then I’d do it. Even if I wasn’t all that enthusiastic about it. Before coming here, I enjoyed reading, singing, drama—even just watching others perform; I also liked planting flowers.

“I like books, but I’m assuming there’s not a club around here that offers reading.” I tilted my head, eyeing her curiously.

Her face lit up instantly. “We have a book club on Saturdays. Is there anything else? Something more hands-on?”

My mind flashed back to my life before this. Going to church with Alex had always made me feel better. Most places like this offered that as an option, so maybe it was worth a shot. “Church?” I pressed, not bothering to hide the hopefulness from my tone.

“We have a sermon tonight actually. I can get you signed up for that too, if you’d like.”

My shoulders dropped with relief. “Thanks.”

Gloria nodded, her gaze sweeping from me toward the food I hadn’t bothered touching. “I’ll go ahead and do that while you eat. I’ll be back in an hour to get you for group.” She shot me one last smile before slipping out of the room.

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