Page 101 of Ramsey & Emerson

Chapter 18

Emerson~

Even though I felt like Ramsey carried more of the blame for the mess that we were in, I still felt the weight of our argument like it was all my fault, simply because I hated fighting with my husband. Now, while I wasn’t afraid to fight with him, at this age, all these years later, we shouldn’t have anything to fight about. At least, not anything this big.

There was also the fact that I had failed to address Ramsey’s concerns seriously. Though other women weren’t a problem for me, that didn’t give me the right to force my views onto Ramsey, despite the fact that other men weren’t a threat to him. Adrian had said something inappropriate, and I should have taken that seriously. I’d always known that Ramsey was a bit unstable, so I’d taken on that responsibility when I had married him twenty-five years ago, and I knew better than to dismiss his feelings when it came to me or anything having to do with our marriage or family.

So, after another stoney morning, I knew that I was going to have to say something to Adrian. Even if I looked like a fool, I needed to have my husband’s back just like he’d always had mine. While all of this could just be in Ramsey’s head, it didn’t matter. I needed to make sure that there wasn’t any confusion on Adrian’s part about my marriage.

I was also very aware that we hadn’t fooled anyone yesterday. Though Lake had been innocently unaware, I knew that Ram hadn’t missed the underlining tension between me and his father. Though he’d been smart enough not to say anything, it was only a matter of time before he called me to check on me. In fact, my bet was that he probably already spoke with Ramsey about it.

At any rate, it was close to lunch time, and so that’s what had me walking towards Adrian’s office, ready to do what I should have done when Ramsey had first come to me with his concerns. Again, since Adrian had yet to say or do anything to me that reeked of any kind of unprofessionalism, I didn’t care. Ramsey mattered more to me than whatever Adrian Cossacks might think of me.

Luckily, Adrian’s door was open, so as soon as I was close enough, I knocked on the door frame. “Are you home?’

Adrian looked up from his desk, and as soon as he noticed that it was me, he smiled my way. “For you, I am.”

Normally, I’d shut the door for a private conversation, but the last thing that I wanted to do was be behind closed doors with a man that my husband had taken issue with. Even though I’d never cheat on Ramsey, he’d made his feelings about Adrian clear, and I was not about to add more gasoline onto this already volatile fire.

I walked into his office, then sat down, and even though I’d worn my hair down to hide Ramsey’s mark, I was suddenly very aware of the wound, and like the damaged person that I was, all it did was make me want to go find my husband for more.

Christ, we were sick.

“What can I help you with, Emerson?” he asked as soon as I was comfortably seated.

“I’d like to talk about Friday night, Adrian,” I answered to the point.

His back straightened, but very subtly. Had I not been watching him so closely, I would have missed it. “What about Friday night? I thought the event was a huge success.”

“It was,” I agreed. “FTC is a great outreach program for kids and teachers, and they were able to raise millions Friday night.”

“Then what’s the problem?” he asked, and if I were a person that believed in a world with no evil, I would have missed the underlining tone in his voice.

“While I can appreciate the sentiment behind presenting me with that recognition plaque, I’m not big on attention, and I feel like those kinds of announcements take away from the very reason that we’re there,” I told him, doing my best not to sound like an ungrateful bitch when discussing anything that had to do with children’s events.

“I’m not sure I understand what you mean,” he replied evenly. “I mean, I understand that some people are uncomfortable with attention, but I’m not sure I understand what you mean by the recognition.”

“By presenting me with that plaque, even for just a few moments, you took the attention away from the silent auction, the art showing, the networking, and all the other stuff that we were there to focus on,” I explained. “For those few moments, the night was no longer about the children. Instead, the attention was centered on one individual person, and that didn’t sit well with me. I became what mattered, and that should never happen, Adrian. It should always be about the children.”

His face softened as he gave me an understanding nod. “I see.”

“Now, I want to be clear that I’m not judging people that do need or want the recognition, but that’s not me,” I went on. “Every minute of Friday nightshould have gone to the kids and teachers of FTC’s wonderful cause, and even if I’m the only person who feels that way, it’s still how I feel. So, moving forward, please save the awards and recognition for someone else.”

Adrian gave me another quick nod of understanding. “Of course. Honestly, I never looked at it that way, and what you said makes a lot of sense. The focus should always be on the children that we’re trying to help.”

I let out a sigh of relief, glad that he agreed. “Thank you for understanding.”

“It gives me something to think about,” he replied kindly. “Maybe it’s time to look at our recognition program and see if there’s a better way to go about things.”

“Actually, I think that our recognition program is fine just the way that it is,” I said. “This is just me telling you thatIdon’t like to be recognized.”

Adrian gave me a bit of a smirk. “Duly noted, Emerson. Is there anything else?”

“There is, actually,” I replied, doing my best to not sound unhinged. “Normally, this would be the part where a woman would apologize for her husband’s behavior because the FTC event wasn’t the time nor place to get personal or unprofessional. However, I’m not that kind of wife.” I made sure to stare him in the eye, so that there was no confusion about whose side I was on. “While I don’t know what all was said between you and my husband, I know that it was enough to upset Ramsey, and that’s not anything that I will allow, Adrian.”

His jaw ticked for a brief second, but I still caught it anyway. “Emerson, I’m not sure what your-”

I put my hand up to stop him. “I’m not looking for an explanation or apology from you, Adrian,” I assured him. “I’m just here to make sure that there are no misunderstandings onanyone’spart when it comes to my job or my marriage. While I am more than certain that you have no interest in me outside our working relationship, it’s been suggested that some things were said that might allude to the opposite, and I just want to make sure that everyone is clear about that.”

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