Page 89 of Married with Mayhem

Luca is eyeing me with a frown. “He told you about them?”

“Not much. He said he’s not close to them anymore. Why?”

Luca is the type of guy who takes just about everything in stride but something about Monte’s cousins bothers him.

“I’m just nosy,” he says and smiles up at his wife. “Did you see me getting it done out there?”

“Gettingwhatdone?” I ask him. “You fell off a horse a few minutes ago.”

“I jumped off,” he says, clearly offended.

“And landed on your ass,” I point out. “Your brother had to give you a hand to haul you out of the dirt.”

Luca sits up and zeroes in on me. He grins and a bad suspicion gurgles in my belly. I have a feeling I’m about to pay for mouthing off.

“Do we have any earplugs at home?” he asks Anni.

“Don’t.” She elbows him with a warning glare.

Luca shrugs. “Someone ought to inform little sister over here that the walls in our house aren’t that thick and remind her she’s staying in the bedroom next to ours.”

My mouth falls open. I’ve never been more sure that my face is crimson.

“Ignore him,” Anni says to me. “He’s being evil right now.”

Luca laughs like a comic book villain. He also manages to wake Jane from her nap. She lets out a precious little cry of outrage with her sweet face all scrunched up.

“Daddy is way too disruptive,” Anni scolds and scoops Jane up into her arms. The crying stops immediately.

“I’m so sorry, Janie,” Luca says. He does indeed look very regretful so I can’t be too annoyed with him, but my own mortification might take some time to fade.

Luca decides to atone for disturbing Jane’s nap by taking her for a walk around the ranch to look at the animals. He holds her on his shoulder and Anni carefully places a pink sunhat on her head.

“We’re going on a field trip, you and me,” Luca says to his daughter and keeps up a steady stream of sugary-voiced baby babble as he carries her across the grass.

“How nice,” I say. “He’s finally found a completely captive audience.”

Anni snorts out a laugh. “Yeah, he may never stop talking now.”

“Were we really that loud last night?”

My sister hesitates, grasping for a diplomatic answer. “The walls in our house really are pretty thin.”

With a groan of humiliation, I hide my face in the folds of the quilt.

“Look on the bright side,” Anni says. “You’ve given Mama every reason to believe you are a euphoric newlywed.”

I put my hands over my head and make a wish to melt into the grass.

While I’m trying to become invisible, Sadie and Margaret return.

“Brina, what’s wrong?” says Sadie.

I lift my head out of the blanket because I don’t want to be impolite. And I can’t breathe. “The entire state of Colorado has apparently heard me having multiple orgasms.”

Sadie’s mouth twitches as she tries to fight a smile. “I didn’t hear you,” she says helpfully.

“Great,” I grumble.

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