Page 45 of Married With Malice

“The secret to getting the cheese perfectly melted,” declares Big Man Bowie, who apparently hears nothing of the current conversation, “is to spray the griddle down with water to create steam.” He pumps from a small spritz bottle. Water sizzles and clouds of steam fill the kitchen.

“I amnotwalking funny,” I inform Sabrina.

She laughs and then starts to choke on a mouthful of cheese. I’m ready to perform the Heimlich but she recovers and agrees to take a seat with a glass of water.

“You see?” Big Man Bowie gestures with the spatula. “Look how nicely the cheese melts.”

“That’s awesome, babe,” Daisy tells him and they share a prolonged smooch.

“Anni, you really are walking funny,” Sabrina announces and resumes gulping her water.

There’s nothing to be gained by arguing with her. Besides, she might be right. After a rocky start, the honeymoon became a haze of wild sex, beach lounging, wine drinking and more wild sex. Luca is practically insatiable and I’m not complaining at all but at times I can admit to feeling pleasantly sore.

When we weren’t busy having orgasms, Luca and I managed to get along. Mostly. Petty bickering matches still broke out but they turned more flirty than vicious. And they’d usually end with yet another steamy outbreak of passion.

Now I’m stuck with the disconcerting idea that I might be developing a serious crush on my husband.

All sex aside, Luca can be…fun. He’s quick to laugh and makes friends everywhere he goes.

I’ve never been fun. Since I tend to gravitate toward equally serious and un-fun people, no one I’ve ever dated has been fun. Being on the arm of a charming, charismatic and absurdly sexy man is a new and dizzying experience.

Big Man Bowie is now toasting brioche buns and Daisy removes a sheet of homemade seasoned fries from the oven. Sabrina asks if she can just have ketchup on her hamburger instead of aioli or grilled onions or cheese. For the first time ever, Big Man Bowie looks offended.

“I’ll just put Luca’s food in the fridge,” I say and add a cheese-topped burger with fries to a plate before covering it with tin foil and placing the plate in the fridge.

When I turn around again, all three of them are smiling at me. To be fair, Big Man Bowie is always smiling and he probably has no special reason for smiling now. The smiles of my sisters are different.

Sabrina rocks on her barstool with a smug grin. Daisy’s head is tilted as she gazes at me with almost maternal affection.

“Our little Anni is in love,” Sabrina says and bites into her hamburger. Ketchup drips on her pink hoodie.

Daisy envelopes me in a fragrant hug. “Anni, I’m so happy for you. I knew it would all work out.”

Everyone is getting quite ahead of themselves. Not a word has been said about love. Explaining this to my sisters will be useless.

Instead of arguing, I eat my burger. It really is excellent. I feel a small amount of pride in knowing that I helped create it.

Big Man Bowie won’t leave until the kitchen is completely clean. He and Daisy brush me off when I try to assist. They truly make an adorable team and Daisy has taken an active role in the food truck business.

Sabrina and I are relegated to the counter barstools while they bustle around the kitchen. Not a minute goes by without Big Man Bowie glancing at Daisy. From the goofily pleased look on his face, it’s clear he can’t believe his luck that she’s all his.

“I’m feeling left out,” Sabrina says while shoving her sticker-covered laptop into her backpack. “Sleeping alone sucks.”

Daisy pauses in the middle of wiping down the counter and stares at Sabrina with confusion. “But you’ve slept alone your whole life.”

“Thanks for pointing that out,” Brina grumbles and lays her head on my shoulder in dramatic fashion. “Anni, please assure me that I won’t die before experiencing a real orgasm with something made of flesh and blood.”

I give her a squeeze and kiss the top of her head. “You’re still recovering from surgery. The orgasms can wait.”

“I’m completely recovered.” She slides off her barstool. “Are we going now? I have class in the city early tomorrow.”

On his way out, Big Man Bowie surprises me with his thoughtfulness when he hands me some index cards with his own recipes written out. “But don’t, like, post them on the internet or anything.” He flashes his trademark toothy grin. “Can’t let everyone know my secrets.”

“They’re safe with me,” I assure him.

Daisy kisses my cheek. Brina hugs my waist.

The minute my sisters are gone, the silence becomes oppressive. Even the temperature seems to drop and I rub my arms as I wander through the house.

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