Page 78 of Married With Malice

Something always happens inside my chest when I watch Annalisa.

Lust is ever-present. I couldn’t get rid of it if I tried and I don’t want to try.

There are also other more indescribable feelings that occupy my mind more strongly than anything I’ve ever known.

Right now I wish like hell she was here with me because shewantsto be, not because her father has threatened to ruin the people she loves if she walks away.

There’s a persistent fear in the back of my mind that I’m screwing up the best thing that’s ever happened in my life. I have to believe this can still be fixed. Anni’s Christmas present is carefully packed in my bag and I’m determined to give it to her when we’re alone together.

There’s just so much shit weighing on my mind. As much as I want to see my brother, I’m uneasy about the role he’s been drafted into. Richie has turned him into a prop to remind me what’s at stake. I’ve never told Anni about the circumstances surrounding Cale’s departure. With the mood so frosty between us right now, this isn’t a great time to come clean.

A bubbly male voice interrupts my thoughts. “How about the two of you join us for a drink?”

He might be about my age, though I can’t be sure because he’s obviously invested in some hefty cosmetic work. He leans over the seat in front of mine and exposes blinding white capped teeth.

“We’re celebrating,” he explains. “Oscar and Tia over there just got engaged last night.”

One of the girls in their group cuts loose with a loud, “WOOHOO!”

The sound bounces off my eardrums and adds to my headache.

“Thanks for the offer,” I say. “But I’m gonna pass.”

His grin only grows wider. “Oh, come on. You don’t look like you’re having much fun back here.”

“Look, pal. I said no. So just fuck right off back to your seat and stay there before I get really pissed.”

His smile evaporates and he grows a bit pale as he begins to slink away.

The whole exchange has drawn Anni’s attention away from the window. There’s something oddly shocked about her expression. It’s how you might stare at a stranger who looks similar to a serial killer you saw in a wanted poster.

I shrug at her as if to say,What’s the big deal?

We don’t know these fucking people and I’m sure we’ll never see them again after today.

But my wife continues to gawk at me like I’m a monster for failing to party with a pack of decadent fools.

Sure, there would have been a time when I wouldn’t have even waited for an invitation before edging over there and making friends but I’ve got other things on my mind now.

It’s only when I catch Mr. Teeth and his friends sneaking furtive, nervous glances this way that I realize my mistake.

Obviously, they know who my father-in-law is.

And while Albie is cozy with a broad cast of characters in the legitimate world, his shadowy reputation still follows.

Thanks to my outburst, they’re assuming I’m some wise guy mafia gangster who might crush some kneecaps if I’m feeling testy.

Too late to smooth things over now. If I stand up and walk over to politely make amends they’ll probably shit bricks before I even open my mouth.

While I’m still mulling over these thoughts, Anni rises from her seat and approaches the group. She greets them in a friendly voice and introduces herself. They relax and break into collective smiles of relief.

Anni’s back is facing me and I can’t hear what she says next but easy laughter follows.

This is certainly a role switch, seeing Annalisa go out of her way to be social while I hang back here and brood alone.

A petite blonde is excitedly waving her hand in Anni’s face now. She’s wearing a rock the size of a jawbreaker so this must be the newly engaged Tia. Anni exclaims over the ring and Tia beams at her.

My eyes keep straying back to my wife. A thick curtain of brown hair cascades past the midpoint of her back. The jeans she’s wearing show off her shape in a way that makes me want to hide her from other men.

---