Page 10 of Rewind

Amina could only stare at him. When they’d first met, she thought he was very attractive. He had an even light brown skin tone and hazel eyes. He had shoulder length dreads which were always neatly twisted and pulled back in a hair band. His neatly manicured mustache and goatee accentuated plump lips.

When he’d initially shown interest in her, she’d been flattered that such a good looking guy would be interested in her. But now seeing him through eyes, she wondered what she could have possibly been thinking? Had her self-esteem been that low that she couldn’t view him objectively?

The things she used to find attractive about him, now left her completely cold. Maybe she was being overly critical because she knew what kind of monster he was but the lips she once thought were so sexy and juicy looked dry and unappealing.

In the time she’d known him, she’d gotten a look at one of his pictures in high school when she’d visited his mother’s house. He had been clean shaven and he had no chin. Without the facial hair, he looked like a completely different person. He had large upturned nostrils making it easy to see up his nose. And it wasn’t particularly appealing whenever he had a cold.

Amina remembered when he’d gotten the flu and green globs of mucus were crusted inside his nose. It was enough to make her stomach turn. He rarely smiled with his teeth for a reason. The times when he did, she noticed his teeth were too small for his large gums.

The image of Dr. Han popped in her head all of a sudden. The comparison of the two men was no contest at all. Dr. Han was taller, with a nicer build and a pair of beautiful brown eyes that lit up with his smiled. Not like the mockery of kindness in Mark’s.

Why hadn’t she noticed this before? Whenever Mark smiled, it never reached his eyes. It was like he was masking the true psychopath he really was.

“Don’t you have anything to say for yourself?” He demanded when she didn’t answer right away.

“What do you want me to say, Mark?”

His eyes widened. “How about sorry for the slamming the car door into me. Or how about for hanging up on me this morning. Look, I know that we all have bad days and maybe you’re starting your period or something but this attitude of yours isn’t cute.”

The longer Amina stood in his presence, the more irritated she became. “I was getting ready for work when you called me, and I clearly said I had to go. I didn’t want to go to lunch with you today because I had other plans and as for slamming the door into you, I think you’re exaggerating. If I hit you with as much force as you claim, you’d still be on the ground. I don’t know why you came over unannounced in the first place. I’m not in the mood for company. You should have taken the hint when we spoke earlier.”

Mark’s mouth fell open and he stared at her like a specimen on a petri dish. “You really have lost your mind haven’t you? You must have bumped your damn head because you’ve forgotten who the hell you’re talking to.” He advanced on her with a clenched fist.

Amina braced herself but she refused to back away. There he was. There was the real Mark. “What are you going to do? Hit me?” She wasn’t sure where she’d gotten the courage to challenge him but she didn’t want to be that frightened shell of herself that he’d turned her into and eventually killed.

He halted mid step and unclenched his fist. “Wow Amina. I honestly don’t know what your problem is, but you need to fix your attitude quick because good black men like me are few and far between. Especially for women like you.”

She raised a brow and crossed her arms across her chest.

“Women like me? Please elaborate.”

His mouth gaped open for a moment because it was clear he wasn’t used to being challenged by her. Then he raised his chin and glared.

“My mother told me that I could do better than you. After all, weren’t you abandoned by your junkie mother and you never knew your father? And your grandmother dabbled in devil worship. My father is a pastor and an upstanding member in our community. My mother is practically a saint. She takes care of the congregation and is the epitome of the perfect wife who supports her husband and takes care of her family.”

Amina couldn’t stop herself from snickering. Mark’s parents were the worst kind of hypocrites. They ran a moderate sized church that had a few hundred members but wasn’t quite big enough to be what was classified as a ‘mega’ one. They did well, but the handful of times she’d attended their church, they were both decked out in designer clothing from head to toe.

First Lady Caldwell had several pairs of red bottoms, while some of the parishioners wore thread bear clothing. There were several clunkers in the parking lot while Pastor Caldwell drove an Escalade with chrome rims and his wife had a Range Rover. Amina didn’t understand why the two of them drove to church separately in those fancy cars if for no other reason than to flex.

Pastor Caldwell spoke about prosperity and giving so that God could hand out the blessings but from what Amina saw, the only one being blessed was were the Caldwell’s. The McMansion they lived in on the hill of an exclusive gated community told Amina everything she needed to know about that family. However, when she’d first started dating Mark, Amina had been blinded by opulent lifestyle in the name of Jesus.

Mrs. Caldwell was a terrible snob who looked down on her and made snide comments about the way Amina dressed, how nappy her hair was, and how dark her skin was. It was clear she didn’t think Amina was good enough for her precious son.

Pastor Caldwell wasn’t much better. Though he was better at hiding his contempt, his kind of ick was worse because when he wasn’t sitting in judgment of her, he was giving Amina lecherous looks. His sister Deanna was a total pick-me who parroted everything her mother said. Thankfully she married early into Amina and Mark’s relationship and moved to Nigeria with her missionary husband.

When Mark completely dropped his mask of kindness and the bruises appeared all over Amina’s body, they all turned a blind eye to her pain and struggle. His mother even applied that Amina deserved it.

The more she thought about the horrible past treatment from Mark and his family, the angrier she grew. Amina didn’t owe any of them a damn thing, especially Mark.

“To be quite honest, I don’t give a shit what your mother thinks about me and clearly you agree with her if you’re repeating it to me. Maybe she’s right. We don’t belong together. Why don’t you go find yourself a nice upstanding church girl your mommy and daddy approve of and you can exit from my life.”

Before Amina could blink, Mark gripped her by the arms and slammed her against the wall. The fear she’d felt all those years from his abuse instantly returned and Amina realized she’d pushed him too far. Mark was a true nut case, and she needed to be careful, so she didn’t end up like she did in her previous life.

“You need an attitude adjustment, Amina. Do you think you can just dump me like I’m a piece of trash after I’ve invested all this time in you? Who the hell do you think you are?”

She wanted to slap his face, kick, scream and bite but the flashback of his last rage-filled black out made her shake with terror. His eyes were wide and wild. He was practically foaming at the mouth as his breath heaved aggressively. Amina playedthis the only way she could think to get herself out of this situation safely.

“Mark, you’re hurting me. Please let me go, unless you’d like for me to call the police. What would your pillar of the community parents say if their son was arrested?”

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