Page 59 of The ABCs of You & Me

“Well, I guess it’s a good thing we never took that step,” Sophie says coldly, and I squeeze her hand tighter.Stay with me, I think.

Karl stares at her for a beat, concern etched on his weathered face. “Indeed.” His eyes slide to mine, and I see a question there. A reminder that she hasn’t shared everything with anyone, not even the ones she’s closest to.

I desperately want to know. I want her to tell me everything so I can hold all the hurt Gregory caused for her. I’d start a riot for Sophie. Burn the world to the ground and put her heart back together with the ashes.

TWENTY-SIX

SOPHIE

“I did not expect an Easter basket,” Foster says, sorting through the literal basket on his lap. He ripped into it the second we got in the car. “I don’t think I’ve had one since I was like”—he stops to think—“ten, maybe.”

“I’m not convinced my mother realizes I know the Easter Bunny isn’t real.”

“Never tell her you know,” he says, popping a jellybean into his mouth.

The weekend was interesting. The difference between Foster around his family versus mine was stark. He walked on eggshells around his, his body language tight, buttoned up, on guard for whatever attack one of his cousins or uncle were ready to launch.

At my parents’ place he was open, his smiles wide and genuine, not a single worry lingering behind his eyes. Meanwhile, I was on guard with my family. Ready to divert any mention of Gregory that I could. Ready to avoid letting them in on how not awesome things had been for years, yet again.

“You okay?”

I glance over as I pull to a stop at the end of my parents’ road. “Yeah.” I force a smile. “Just.” I swallow. “Nothing.”

“You know you can talk to?—?”

“I haven’t shared a bed with a guy since him. I also haven’t told my parents everything. There’s a lot they don’t know because I don’t know how to bring it up. I… you saw my mom at my place. We have never had secrets from one another. It’s going to take me time to open up. I’m still figuring things out, still trying to understand how I missed so much.”

He doesn’t respond, just reaches over and gently squeezes my arm as I turn right and head for home.

“Good Easter?” Principal Wong asks when she walks into the staff room to fill her coffee mug on Tuesday morning.

“Yeah, you?”

“Oh, you know, the usual. Too much food, kids hopped up on sugar.” She sighs. “I’m glad I caught you, actually.”

My heartbeat intensifies. I’m not doing something right. I’ve told a kid the wrong thing. Something awful happened to one of the students. I’m being transferred to a new school.

“I heard you and a certain EA are seeing one another socially.” I swear my heart stops. It resumes only when I see the smile on her face. The relief that I’m not about to be reprimanded is immense.

Foster and I haven’t talked about this. We are definitely friends, but are we still fake dating for certain people? Are we broadening the net to include people beyond the ones we were initially trying to fool? Panic begins to rise as my heart beat quickens. We should have discussed this at length. Should have set more rules and boundaries.

“Sophie.” Principal Wong’s hand rests lightly on my arm. “Don’t panic, it’s not against the rules or anything, and the fact no one really knows tells me you’re both professionals.”

“We are, yes,” I say. I didn’t confirm or deny anything other than the fact we are professionals. That should be okay. Unless she finds out that it’s all fake and then is upset with me for lying.You didn’t.But didn’t I? I omitted the truth; that may as well be lying.It’s a victimless lie.Hardly. I’m going to be a casualty of this lie. The gravitational pull of Foster is powerful, and I’m afraid of being pulled in so violently that my entire existence breaks into a billion pieces when he moves along to something real.

You’re doing it again. You’re making your entire life about a guy.

She’s still talking, and I’m barely listening. No, I’m panicking.

“I’m sorry,” I interrupt. “I have a call in a couple minutes so I need to get back.” The lie comes too easily. Or maybe this is me now, Sophie Hore, expert liar. Gregory gave me one skill, I guess.

I slip out of the room and hurry back to my office, avoiding every person on my way, hoping Foster doesn’t pop around a corner.

In my office, I lock my door and pace around the tiny space before grabbing my phone and calling Maya.

“What’s up, buttercup?” comes her cheery voice.

“Hey,” I squeak. Fuck. I wanted to sound fine. I don’t want her to worry, I just need to talk to my friend.

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