Page 39 of The ABCs of You & Me

I’m already hiding my true feelings, feelings that are rising to the surface far faster than I’d expected. If I add in more pretending I may let something slip. And for Sophie’s sake, I can’t allow that to happen.

TWENTY

SOPHIE

Maya

The new lamps broke!

Both of them?

Can confirm.

Acrobatic guy?

Yes.

I mean if it’s worth it I guess you’ll have to factor in a lamp budget. Or remove the lamps before you get going.

Oh it’s worth it. I’m learning a lot about myself.

I stop midway out of my car. Maya and I have been close since I walked into my university dorm room for the first time and she greeted me with a big hug. And right now I’m torn between wanting to know what exactly she’s learning and never knowing.

As long as you’re being safe and having fun.

I’m so much bendier than I ever realized.

If she’d come to Pilates with me, she’d have realized that long ago. I grab my yoga mat and bag of groceries out of the car before making my way to the house.

I’m very happy for you!

And I am. Maya is notoriously hard to please in just about every aspect of her life, so if she found someone who does it in an area she happens to really enjoy, that’s terrific.

My relationship with sex changed drastically from the start of my relationship with Gregory to the end of it. Looking back, it’s so easy to see the pattern. In the beginning, he centered me. Then gradually it became all about him. His pleasure, his desires, his moods, his kinks. He’d do what he wanted, then clean up and go to sleep or carry on with whatever his plans had been. I know looking back and berating myself isn’t the answer. I’m trained in this, and yet that’s what I do.

Lost in thought, I jump when my phone rings. I never have the ringer on, so I must have hit the switch by accident.

Mom’s face takes up the screen, and I immediately feel a bit better.

“Hey,” I answer with as much pep as I can muster. My parents don’t know a thing about what happened with Gregory. They just think the relationship had run its course.

“Hey, Soph,” Mom’s voice comes through clear as a bell, which means she’s standing on the third step of the porch.

“What’s up?” I ask, walking to the front door to hang my grocery bag on the handle. If I don’t do that I end up buying a new bag every single time I go shopping.

“I was wondering if you’d like an overnight houseguest tomorrow?” she coos sweetly.

“Um…” I start.

“Unless you’re busy, I can stay at a hotel,” she adds quickly.

I’m not going to let my mother stay at a hotel when the only reason I live in a house rent-free is because she and my dad bought it as an investment property when I was a kid.

“No, don’t be silly. Of course you can stay here.”

“If you have plans, though, keep them. I’ll entertain myself,” she insists.

“Why will you be in the city?” I throw myself down in my favorite armchair.

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