Page 28 of The ABCs of You & Me

“That there is Joker Juice. Take a sip and tell me what you think is in it.”

Sophie is still looking inquisitively into her cup so I take one for the team. Except when I tip the cup only a dribble of liquid comes out. The remainder of the green substance stays firmly inside the glass. “It’s Jello!” Sophie looks up smiling. “With”—she smells inside the glass—“water?” When she looks up she freezes as both Dan and Maria are staring at her. “Did I ruin the prank? I did, didn’t I? Oh my god, I’m a walking party pooper.”

“I’m actually impressed,” Maria proclaims, smiling brightly at Sophie, who starts to relax. “What gave it away? You didn’t even attempt to take a sip.”

“Well, it is a pretty heavy glass.” Sophie shrugs. “It also doesn’t feel like a glass of liquid. It’s a solid prank, though. Sure fooled this one.” She bumps me lightly with her elbow.

“I’m not sure if this makes me gullible or an idiot.” I sigh. Thankfully no one confirms that I’m an idiot. Although no one denies it either.

If Sophie is surprised that Dan and Maria clearly aren’t from the same generation as us, she doesn’t let on. Instead, she falls into easy conversation with them while we wait for others to arrive.

Within ten minutes, more cursing comes from the entry and we all watch as people slowly emerge from the balloons. One of them, noticeably angrier than the rest.

I thought it was Miranda who’d released an angry curse when her shin had connected with whatever immobile object I had run into earlier. “That better be a real drink and not some fucking prank nonsense,” she grumbles in place of a traditional greeting, her hand instantly reaching for the glasses Dan and Maria have ready.

Maria looks quickly over at Dan with a look that screams “I told you so,” but because Maria is the nicest person alive, there’s a “love of my life” tacked on at the end.

“Don’t mind her, she had a late night.” Heather yawns. “Me too, come to think of it.”

“Was it fun at least?”

“Well they lost so it could have been better,” Miranda grumbles, waving off the fake drink. “No, I’d prefer a real one, please. The twins had us up at five, and then Mike’s parents called to say they were sick and couldn’t babysit. Hence”—she waves at the empty space beside her—“no Mike.”

“How fun for Mike. Babysitting them last night and again today.” Dan laughs.

The laugh dies on his lips as he takes in Miranda’s expression. “They are his children. It is not babysitting when they are your offspring. If I was home with them, no one would say a thing. But oh, dad is staying home with the kids, what a sai?—”

“Oh no, fucking no, just no. Dan!” Nick yells from the entry, silencing Miranda immediately. “I’m leaving. I’m going right back to my car and never speaking to you again.”

Miranda’s anger seems to vanish, and she disappears into the balloons. The door opens and slams, and we’re all left standing there in stunned silence.

“I didn’t mean anything by it. I stayed home with our kids.” Dan winces.

“She’s exhausted and hungry. She’ll be back to her usual self the minute she gets some food in her.”

The back door opens, and we all move further into the house. “Real great prank friends, stellar.” Nick looks shaken, and his partner Alex rubs his back, looking concerned.

“He’s got globophobia,” they say like any of us know what that means.

When no one says anything, Sophie whispers, “That’s a fear of balloons.”

“Oh shit!” Dan exclaims. “I had no idea, Nick. Why have you never mentioned it?”

“Well, I’ve never been so aggressively confronted with the fear. I’ve only ever had nightmares of being in that”—he points toward the front of the house—“kind of situation.”

“So this year’s festivities are off to a grand beginning.” Maria sighs. “Dan, perhaps we should get the drinkable drinks flowing?”

“Oh,” Sophie says, startling all of us as she reaches around me to grab the bag I’m still holding. “I brought you this.” She holds up the gift bag, and Maria takes it.

“You did not need to— Oh, bubbly!” she squeals, pulling the bottle from the bag and doing a little shimmy. “You,” she says, pointing at Sophie, “are welcome anytime.”

FOURTEEN

SOPHIE

To say that getting to know Foster’s friends is an education is an understatement. They all met while teaching English in Korea, which explains the wide range of ages. Nick explained that it was like being in university all over again. You make fast, strong friendships with people all in the same situation. In their case, expats living in a new country with a different language and customs.

“Dan and Maria were the senior teachers at the English academy I was at, then I met Miranda, Heather, and Nick in Korean class,” Foster explains. “One day I invited everyone out for dinner after class and asked if Dan and Maria wanted to join us.”

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