Page 86 of This Monster of Mine

Kadra’s features were devoid of emotion. “Predicting how you’ll act isn’t manipulation.”

Her blood boiled. She couldn’t even blame him. She’d done it all herself. “So this was your plan. To rid yourself of Helvus and a Petitor you didn’t want.”

“To see if you’d let him die a victim or a villain.”

“Thenask!” She’d thought they’d built enough of a relationship for that. “Why the fuck would you drag out two other Tetrarchs and get me strangled? Was this some sort of test—” She froze, thinking back to the vigiles and healers who’d already been waiting outside Helvus’s in time for her arrival. How no one had been surprised at Aelius’s and Tullus’s appearance.

No.“Was this a test?” she whispered.

The cruel edge to his smile was all the answer she needed. And her control shattered.

She didn’t notice herself pushing away from the wall or closing the distance between them. She barely felt her hands fist in his robes, uncaring of his vigiles’ wide-eyed stares. All she saw was the arrogant face above her.

“You godsdamned bastard,” she snarled. “I’ve given you no cause to suspect my loyalty. From the Robing to every bazaar we’ve adjudicated in, have I notconsistentlyheld to my duties as your Petitor?” She wanted to scream that she’d had every chance to rat him out to Aelius and chosen not to, but he wouldn’t care. She’d only been a tool to him. Today had proven it.

Kadra tipped his head down at her. “Doing your duty before a crowd is simple. Today, you went against half the Tetrarchy.”

Sarai lost what little breath she had left. “This was about your game of choosing you over the Tetrarchy? You had me earn the ire of two Tetrarchs forthat?”

“Would you have let Helvus die as a victim if it meant keeping their goodwill?” he asked softly.

She knew he could see the answer on her face. Her hands ached with the desire to hurt him, to make him feel as small and foolish as he had her.

Releasing his robes, she laughed. Short, bitter, as ugly as his. “You think you’re better than the rest of the Tetrarchy? You aren’t. To them, everyone is expendable to law and procedure. And everyone is expendable to you, period. If the law deserves to be torn down, then so do you for treating yourallieslike puppets.”

He’d stilled when she called herself his ally, but she broke in as his lips parted.

“Still, I’m a quick study, Tetrarch Kadra. So rest assured I’ve understood everything you sought to impart.” Another half-step forward and they were a breath apart. “The law of this land is wrong. Its lawmakers are even worse. Tullus is a violent bastard.” She checked each lesson off on her fingers before balling up the robes he’d draped over her and throwing them to the ground. “And you’re the worst of them all, youhavïdsadist.”

Shaking with hurt and fury, she mounted Caelum. But as she pivoted, the man watching her with what looked like pride did the strangest thing.

He smiled.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

She wandered the city. Thinking, trying not to think. Life outside a Petitor’s strict schedule seemed a busy, beautiful thing. Coin to be earned, a thousand ways to spend it, all manner of books, clothes, foods, and lands that seemed close under a sunset that made everything feel possible.

Perhaps she could run away. Leave behind vengeance and people who saw her as a tool. Before the thought would have felt like a betrayal of her younger self, but she was so horribly tired. Perhaps the Fall didn’t matter, and she should have moved on with her life as Cisuré had said. Maybe then, she wouldn’t be facing charges for abusing her power.

Her head hurt. She wished she could down Telmar’s entire supply ofibez.

Hours after an unsuccessful attempt at eating, she squinted at a Tower Gate. The letters etched at the top swam in her watery vision.

“This is the Favran Tower Gate,” one of the magi standing guard finally muttered in exasperation when she rose on her toes to decipher the lettering.

Cassandane’s tower. Entering, she walked beside Caelum, kicking a pebble across the cobblestone path. Ahead, Favran Tower was at least a hundred and sixty-five yards high. Vines and flowers curled possessively over the orange-red limestone surface exterior. Wine red, they perfumed the night breeze with traces of cherry and mint. The petals were an exact match for Cassandane’s crimson robes.

At the sound of hooves behind her, she turned to find the Tetrarch herself, dark hair tumbling loose about her shoulders. Looking surprised upon sighting her, Cassandane dismounted.

“Petitor Sarai.” A dimple flashed her cheek when she smiled. “What brings you to my tower?”

Sarai bowed. “I was admiring the flowers.”

“Naiya’s Orchids. Hardy little things.” Cassandane plucked a low-hanging bloom and handed it to her. “I’ve tried a few varieties, but nothing grows as well as these beauties.”

“They’re lovely.” Sarai traced the soft petals with wonder. Arsamea hadn’t had much in the way of flowering plants. “Is there a reason for the name?”

Cassandane’s eyes brightened. “It’s an old tale. Centuries ago, when matters were quite sour between Ur Dinyé and the island nation of Kashyal, there was an Kashyalin debt-slave, Naiya.” She leaned against a column bracketing the entryway to her tower. “Now, Naiya understandably has little interest in being a slave and escapes one night. But as the gods would have it, she’s mistaken as the subject of an ancient prophecy, a heavens-sent demon master, and captured by a bounty hunter.”

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