Page 111 of This Monster of Mine

Anek let out a bark of laughter. “He couldn’t look a woman in the face if it killed him. It’s right down to the tits.” They tossed their dagger in the air and caught it. “But we all play the game.”

“You sound like Telmar. He’s been telling me to keep my head down from the start.”

“Never discount what Telmar’s seen. He’s been a magus for decades.” Anek withdrew a crimson handkerchief and handed it to her. “I also came by to give you this. Cassandane says that her offer to leave still stands. If you’re ever in need of her assistance, place that somewhere visible.”

“That’s kind of her.” Sarai sighed. “She knows everything too, doesn’t she?”

“She’s the fulcrum,” Anek mused. “Not powerful enough to support Kadra without causing a civil war, and too weak to whittle at Aelius and Tullus like Kadra does. If he falls, then Aelius and Tullus will stand uncontested.”

“He won’t fall,” she said firmly.

“Perhaps not. But he’s been acting uncharacteristically reckless. Bringing that strike on Admia’s home was a bad move. I’ve seen him change only once before and that wasn’t for the better.” At her confused look, they explained. “He went a little mad with the bloodshed when he first ascended to Tetrarch after Othus was killed. I thought it was because he cared for Othus in his own way, even if Othus wasn’t particularly kind to him. But, sometimes, I wonder if there was something else that changed him four years ago. Just like you seem to be the catalyst now.”

Four years ago. That number kept cropping up.

Anek raked a hand through their curls. Getting to their feet, they stretched out a hand to help her up, then stopped. “Sorry, forgot you don’t like being touched.” They laughed at her shock. “Did you really think you were being unobtrusive, flinching sky-high whenever Harion prodded at you?”

This city was going to pry all her secrets from her. “It’s just … men,” she muttered and accepted their hand up. “You’re fine.”

Grinning, they slapped her shoulder, then cleared their throat. “You don’t seem as uncomfortable with Kadra, though.” Her eyes narrowed, and Anek winked. “Now, don’t tense up. It isn’t just me. Every vigile across Edessa was probably assigned to watch you two at the start.”

“Care to share what you discovered?”

“Some other day.” They chuckled at her unamused stare. “Hold Kadra back. Cassandane’s convinced that he’s up to something. Keep him on his throne. And Sarai”—their face turned serious—“be very, very afraid of Aelius and Tullus.”

Shoulders slumping, she watched their departing figure grow smaller in the distance. “I am afraid. That’s the problem.”

Perhaps this was why Telmar drank. There was nothing sweeter than oblivion in a world this ugly. But as she fell asleep in Aoran Tower for what could be her fifth last night, she prayed to a silent sky that she wouldn’t see that oblivion soon.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

“I think that’s it.” Three days before the trial that would determine her fate, Gaius leaned back with a groan. “That’s every book in here.”

Sarai slumped against the wall. She had written records of Petitor deaths matching with dates of stormfall, family statements of a common theme of paranoia before their deaths, registers of the Metals Guild buying plots of land after they’d been struck by lightning, and she’d soon be requesting the certificates Jovian had mentioned of Helvus’s ownership of the iron mine from which he’d produced the scuta.

But she had no direct evidence.

Heading to the Hall of Records, she tried to convince herself that she could survive a thousand lashes, while Gaius kept up a steady stream of chatter to boost her spirits. She’d always expected to starve in Arsamea, not be whipped before a crowd.

“Sometimes, I think you’re more terrifying than Tetrarch Kadra,” Gaius went on cheerfully. “Scarier when you can use their mind against them, instead of mutilating or burning or torturing the truth out of men and women—” Finally seeming to realize that he wasn’t doing Kadra’s character any credit, he pressed his lips shut.

“So Tetrarch Kadra tortures women?” she asked wearily.

“They commit crimes too, you know!”

“Right,” she muttered. “What if it was a girl? Say, fourteen.”

Gaius’s brow furrowed. “Tetrarch Kadra doesn’t harm young people. Sends them to the mines in rare cases. But he tends to give them a chance.”

At least there was that.

She had the Hall of Records memorized at this point. Seeking out the dull gray limestone building that housed the Mining Archives, she requested the records for iron mines found over four years ago. The archivist’s eyebrows jumped to the ceiling.

“It’s good to have someone come looking for these.” He handed her a set of tomes. “Haven’t had anyone read those since Telmar.”

Her fingers stilled on the first page. “Magus Telmar?”

“You know, the drunk.” The archivist chuckled. “How he hasn’t stabbed himself during a swordsmanship lesson is beyond everyone. The man has a liver of stone.”

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