Page 51 of This Monster of Mine

“I beg you, please not my hands.” Red Tunic—gods, she still didn’t know his name—clawed at the vigiles. “Don’t take my livelihood! It’ll never happen again!”

Kadra’s teeth flashed. “That’s what I’m ensuring.”

He brought the sword down before she could look away.

An ugly crack. Blood sprayed across the table and into her inkwell. The arm hit the ground, lopped off below the shoulder, bone flashing white. She couldn’t breathe.

Screaming, the man scrabbled in the dirt, gripping the limb and pressing it to the gaping wound as though the seam would mend itself. “I need a healer! Bring me a healer!”

Kadra raised a hand. The limb burst into flame, withering quickly as Red Tunic howled.

And the quiet, monstrous part of her smiled.

She stood so quickly the world spun and stumbled over to the plaintiff. He stared blankly at the proceedings. Her eyes burned. All this bloodshed, and no one had asked whathe’dwanted.

She knelt beside him. “Are you alright?”

“Yes.” She stilled when a bloodthirsty grin split his face. “Yes, Wrath be praised. The bastard deserved it.” He gripped her hands in his worn palms, and she halted a flinch. “Feels good, doesn’t it? Seeing justice.”

The heat behind her eyes spread like a stain. She looked away, looked inside to the black force caged in her head, grinning wide. Something she didn’t want to name clogged her throat.

“Yes,” she whispered.Gods forgive me.“It feels good.”

The crowd dispersed as Kadra called an end to court and discussed Red Tunic’s transport to the mines with his vigiles. Numbly returning to her now-blood-spattered judgment, Sarai blotted it with her sleeve, watching red vanish into the fabric. She sighted a figure watching them from the bazaar’s gate. Helvus’s eyes darted from her to Kadra in the slow manner of a blackstripe bear surveying its prey before launching an attack.

The most prominent Guild in Ur Dinyé and I made an enemy of them. Her hands shook worse than ever as she smoothed out the scroll and began writing out Kadra’s verdict. She gripped her wrist with her left hand to steady it when a shadow fell over the parchment.

“I’ll finish it.” Kadra’s voice brushed the shell of her ear.

Her breath hitched. “Don’t make allowances for me. I need to get used to this if I’m to earn anyone’s respect.” She paused. “Tibi gratias agofor stopping him earlier.”

A wrinkle formed between his eyebrows. “You would have dealt with him anyway.”

“And gotten my cheekbone broken. I know you didn’t do it for me, but thank you.”

The wrinkle deepened. “You’re my Petitor,” Kadra said softly, like he hadn’t tried to make her leave the job at the Robing. “No hand can strike you.”

Does that include yours?She couldn’t move when he took the parchment from her. Suddenly, it was all too much. The harsh sunlight, the buzzing of people in the bazaar, the bloodstains on the table.Him.

“Am I …” Her voice came out ragged, and she tried again. “Are we done today?”

Studying her, he nodded. “Gaius will accompany you back.”

She bowed stiffly, not insisting on finishing the damned judgment or asking why he wasn’t coming with her. She’d only taken one step away when he spoke again.

“You did well.”

Her guard cracked. Storming off to her horse with Gaius trailing after her, she dug in her heels, fighting tears all the way to Aoran Tower. A single realization tormented her throughout.

Kadra hadn’t lied once all day.

This time, when the knock came at her door, she was ready.

Sleep had eluded her for hours. Upon her return to Aoran Tower, Cato had taken one look at her and made a lovely orange and honey brew in what seemed to be a never-ending apology for a minor bit of deception. But the nightmares had still found her, garish visions of Jovian’s mangled body coming to life on the ice block, pleading for justice.

Staring at the ceiling, she’d tried to rationalize Kadra’s actions that day. Even evil men performed a few decent deeds, didn’t they? Nothing changed the fact that Kadra had been present the night of the Fall and hadn’t mentioned that pertinent fact even with the discovery of Jovian’s letter.He isn’t after justice, she reminded herself.He just likes blood.

So when the knock came again, her shield was firmly in place. Scars hidden, she drew the bolt open. “I’m ready.”

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