Annoyance flashes across his face before his expression returns to the more familiar mask.
“Did you want me to?” he bites out.
Relief rushes over me. This was likely just the first test of many, but I’m still happy to have passed it.
Feeling bolder, I hold out my hand for the tablet. Cillian briefly hesitates before relinquishing it, mouth pinched in a thin line.
“I won’t consent to anything that causes permanent damage.” I thumb through the list of explicit kinks. My knowledge might be exhaustive, but it’s still entirely theoretical. I think back to the educational materials we’d been encouraged to consume at the Enclave. Most of it would have qualified as pornography if there had been better pictures accompanying the dry and academic text. A proper Omega is supposed to be prepared for anything her Alpha might want from her. Figuratively or literally. “For example, section 7.2 references bondage and rope suspension. That can cause muscle or nerve injury.”
“Not when done properly, but I’ll concede your point.” His brief smile is there and gone so quickly that I might have imagined it. “To clarify, you are willing to endure temporary incapacitation as long as any injury does not result in long-term disability?”
I swallow past the lump in my throat. “Fine.”
“What about permanent cosmetic procedures?”
“No one is shaving my eyebrows and tattooing on new ones, if that’s what you mean.”
“Electrolysis?”
“You’re not shocking me with electricity, beta.”
He rolls his eyes. “Electrolysis, not electricity. Not entirely painless, but it’s a common procedure for the permanent removal of body hair.”
I can’t stop the blush that heats my cheeks, more from anger than embarrassment. Obviously, Logan would want me plucked more bare than a spring chicken. A fuzzy armpit might ruin the image of physical perfection that everyone expects from a proper Omega.
I swear most Alphas would be happier with a porcelain doll, assuming it had holes in the right places and could cry on demand.
“Acceptable from the neck down only.”
Cillian scoffs at that. “I sincerely doubt Logan has any intention of defiling your crowning glory.”
His words aren’t a compliment and I don’t miss his note of sarcasm. If I ever really did need to make a run for it, I might as well fly a bright purple banner behind me.
“Is there anything in the contract that prevents me from changing it? My hair, I mean?” I ask casually. “Cutting? Dyeing? Shaving it all off bootcamp style?”
Cillian’s lips twitch in quickly stifled amusement. “There is not.”
Definitely a tidbit worth remembering.
We comb through the rest of the contract as I fight off waves of shame at what I’m signing up to do. Perkins stays mostly silent, aside from gasps of surprise and growls ofoutrage at some of the terms. It’s obvious that Logan wants me publicly humiliated in every way he can imagine.
The reality of my situation settles over me by the time we get to the end.
Logan has no intention of bonding with me as his Omega or even keeping me around long-term. A mating bond creates an obligation between an Alpha and an Omega. Alphas are compelled by their biology to protect their Omegas, too many emotions become shared for it to be otherwise.They aren’t able to do any actual damage without harming themselves.
If Logan did half of the things allowed by our contract, any bond formed between us would be broken beyond repair, shattered bits of glass shredding our insides until we were hollow shells.
The bond would feel like breaking your own heart, over and over again.
Cillian takes back the tablet and makes a few quick notes with the stylus. “I believe we’ve come to an acceptable place.”
“I have one more stipulation.”
“Why am I not surprised?” he replies with a grimace. “This has already taken long enough. Out with it.”
Cillian gives no obvious reaction when I make my last demand. The ice in his eyes remains so thick I can practically skate across it as he stares at me.
Perkins has a stronger reaction, her jaw dropping practically to the floor. She whispers urgent questions about whether I’m really sure about this, that I’ll ruin any chance I have at a permanent position.