Page 61 of Cruel Existence

I rubbed my temples, wishing I had stopped at one bottle. There was a cloud of Amara in the air. I must have dreamed about her. A drunken dream, but she had been closer to me than she had in months. I needed the particles to evaporate before I could leave. They lingered a few more seconds and then it was as if it had never happened.

Killing Lorenzo had become a much longer waiting game than I had anticipated. Once he was hospitalized, I had hoped fatewould take him out, but Maksim reported he was released and would be home, recovering. There was a chance he would make a full recovery and I wasn’t willing to take that chance.

I waited all night for the call.

Had they killed the bastard?

Was Amara safe?

I climbed the stairs and emerged in a construction zone. The rebuilding of the offices had started last week. The framing had gone up quickly. I wanted to take a shower in the castle before I met the recruits for training. I strolled over the sawdust. My footprints scattered more scraps of wood and nails.

I was surprised to see Nik’s number pop up on my phone and not Maksim’s.

“Yeah?” I barked.

“We have her,” he reported.

I had to keep myself from staggering.

“H-how is she?” Fuck. I didn’t want to sound like a teenager. But the reality of what I had done was heavy. Dark.

“Scared shitless. But I got the right size clothes you asked for. And she has food. Not a scratch on her. I swear.”

I leaned forward, placing my hands on my knees. “Good. Good. And Lorenzo?”

“Dead,” he answered. “Maks made sure he was awake. He saw it coming. Your uncle has been avenged with honor.”

I inhaled. It was hard to know what was honorable anymore. I had saved Amara. She was alive. Safe. Breathing. Unharmed.

“Keep her a few days. Make sure she has enough food. Ok? And a change of clothes. More clothes. And blankets.” Knowing she was in one of our many holding houses was not appealing. I knew what those places were like and how many people had been tortured inside them.

“I understand. No one will go near her.”

“Remember what I told you, Nik. If you keep her safe I will make you my Sovietnik. You have my word. But if she is harmed in any way…” I had to stop my throat from closing in. “…you won’t make it out of Siberia, much less be in the Novikov organization.”

“You have my word, too. It would be an honor to serve as your Sovietnik one day.”

I sighed. Offering him the top position in my organization in the far-off future was the only piece of leverage I had. It was a great honor and a tremendous amount of power. I would not be boss until my father died, but I knew Nik trusted me to fulfill the promise. Only if Amara was safe.

“Do you want the link to her feed? You can see for yourself that she is alive,” he asked.

My heart stopped. “You mean watch her?”

“Yeah. I have it streaming on my phone. She can’t get out though. No windows and only one door. We lucked out with her bodyguard being out of town.”

I bowed my head. I couldn’t. If I saw her, I’d lose my mind.

“Yeah. Lucked out. What about the other one? With the scar.”

“Dead too. It was seamless. Their operation is child’s play compared to our training.”

I glanced over at the castle where I had cadets to train. Lethal killing machines, under my command.

“Good work, Nik. I am proud. You have served the Novikovs well today. I’ll call Maks.”

We hung up and I walked into a nearby patch of trees, which had grown together in a thick formation. I gripped the bark of one of the trees, feeling its roughness against my palm. The bark scratched my skin, piercing until it bled into the tree.

“Fuck!” I roared into the sky. She was my prisoner.

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