Page 143 of Lush

The anger clawed at my insides, demanding more. I turned to the shelves, yanking at the books, tearing them down one by one, their heavy spines crashing against the floor. The noise echoed in the silent room, a hollow, pitiful sound compared to the screaming in my head.

I will never be Conrad. I’ll never measure up.

But it wasn’t true.

I’ll never be Conrad—because I’m so much more than he ever was.

I fought, not for glory, not for some twisted sense of approval. I fought to protect what mattered most. To protect Laurene. To protect my family. I fought for love, for something pure and real—something Conrad would’ve never understood.

He was a shadow, a ghost of who I never wanted to be. Cold, ruthless, never looking out for anyone but himself. And I…I wasalive. I was me. I had purpose. I mattered. I’ve always mattered.

My hand found a framed photo on the desk—Conrad’s smug, perfect face staring back at me. My grip tightened around the frame until the edges bit into my palm. With a yell, I hurled it against the wall.

The glass exploded into a thousand jagged shards, scattering across the floor like splinters of everything he’d left behind.

I glanced down and froze. A leather-bound book peeked out from beneath a pile of broken glass and crumpled paper. I picked it up carefully, shards of glass tumbling from its cover, and flipped it open.

The pages felt stiff under my hands. Then I saw it. The handwriting on the first page.

Messy, slanted, unmistakable.

Conrad.

My chest tightened as I scanned the words, the ink smudged in places, as though he’d written in a rush. The air seemed to still around me as I turned the pages, each one pulling me deeper into a part of him I’d never been allowed to see.

He had been keeping secrets too.

I never thought I’d see the day where everything would feel so isolating.

They expect so much from me. I’ve become a stranger even to myself.

Every choice I make feels like it’s for them, for Dad and the family, never for me. I’m simply a role to fill, a name to uphold. Somewhere along the way, I stopped asking myself what I wanted.

I turned the page and found another entry.

I’ve buried so much—dreams, fears, even joy—so deep that I can’t remember what they looked like.

She sees me. No one else does. She brings me a kind of freedom I thought I lost.

I paused. Who was she? Laurene?

I see myself, the man I’ve buried, in her eyes. With her, I’m not the heir, the leader, or the name everyone expects me to be. I’m just…me.

When I’m with her, I can breathe again, free from the burden of Ashbourne Capital. She sees the partsof me no one else even thinks to look for. I can’t marry Laurene. To stand at that altar would be a betrayal—not just of her, but of myself.

Of the love I’ve found in someone else.

My jaw dropped as the words sank in. How the hell did he keep this from us? When did this happen? And who was she?

I can’t live this life anymore. She deserves more. I know what I’m doing is wrong, but…it has to be done. I’ll be there at the engagement party—I’ll smile, toast, and pretend like everything is fine.

By this time tomorrow, they’ll be too busy cleaning up Reese’s mess to even notice I’m missing. He won’t even see it coming. I put everything on a backup file in Avalon, just in case she needs it.

Reese is so predictable. He’ll take the bait—he always does. Bringing him more into the company has been rough, but now it’s worth it. A little nudge here, a word there, and he’ll spiral out of control.

Everyone will look at him. I’ve planted everything I need to make it look like Reese has been the one mismanaging accounts, siphoning funds, and pulling reckless stunts with the company’s name attached. The paper trail is flawless. No one will doubt it’s him.

My heart raced… No. He couldn’t have. I was praying this wasn’t true.