Page 103 of Heir of Illusion

A moment later, the beach is covered in darkness as shadows press in on us from every angle. His snakes slither over the sand, circling me as they hiss at every nearby crustation.

I push myself up, my legs coated in sand. He stands a few feet away, his wings outstretched behind him. In this moment, he’s every bit the menacing God of Death. His eyes are solid black as he watches me with a hard expression.

“That day in his office?” he asks. “When you came out to the hallway, you looked as if you’d been crying, and your face was so pale. I thought perhaps you were just…” he trails off as he clenches his jaw. “He was doing it then, right? He was using the collar against you?”

I nod.

Rage radiates through him at my admission, causing his body to tremble. Shadows press closer as the snakes hiss and snap at invisible threats.

“Tell me how to fix this,” he commands, his body vibrating.

“There’s nothing you can do,” I answer honestly.

“I don’t believe that!” His fingers grip clumps of his hair, pulling at them furiously. “How are you so calm about this?”

My head snaps back. “What makes you think I’m calm?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” He throws his hands up. “How about the fact that you’re standing here so fucking calmly?”

Anger stirs in my gut as I eat up the distance between us. “Do you think I don’t hate this? I do! I’d give anything to be free! But until that happens, I have to be smart! I have to give him whatever he wants and pretend to be his good little pet!”

His eyes darken. “Don’t call yourself that!”

“Why not?” I demand. “You did.”

“And I hate myself for it!” he shouts back at me, taking a step closer. Our chests are nearly touching now. “I should never have thrown that in your face.”

“It’s fine.” I brush it off, uncomfortable with his apology. “Everyone does.”

“That doesn’t make it okay,” he says, his tone softer than before.

He’s right. It doesn’t make it okay. But just like when Naomi hurls hurtful comments at Morwen, it’s easier to pretend it doesn’t sting than to admit the truth. Apathy is the only weapon I have against their attacks. Somehow, I know it would be a thousand times worse if I let them all see how much they’ve broken me.

“I didn’t know at first,” I find myself confessing.

I shuffle back, putting space between us. The shadows have receded somewhat, but the snakes still guard our perimeter.

“Go on,” he says, nodding at me encouragingly.

His wings fold against his back as he forces himself to sit on a large stone. I appreciate the effort he’s exerting to keep his temper in check. I know it’s not easy for him right now.

“When he put it on me, I was only ten years old,” I continue, keeping my gaze on the shore instead of facing at him. It’s easier to divulge shameful truths when I’m not looking at anyone.

“I believed him when he said it was going to protect me.” A dark chuckle claws up my throat. “I was actually excited to have something so nice since my father never let me have beautiful things.”

“Because he’s worthless too,” Thorne grumbles.

“Do you remember down in the tunnels, when I told you that I’d drowned once before?” I ask him in a small voice. “What I didn’t tell you was that it was my father who held me under the water. He—” I cut myself off as I clear the emotion in my throat. “Afterward, he thought I was dead, but I wasn’t. I’d only passed out. And when I woke up, I was in a coffin six feet under.”

Thorne’s fingers dig into the rock beneath him. “Tell me I’mallowedto kill your father.”

I bite my lip against an inappropriate smile and continue without answering him. “That was the chain of events that started all of this. That night, after I crawled out of my own grave and walked home, Baylor was there. He took me away, and I haven’t been home since.”

I squeeze my eyes shut as images flash through my mind of Clara fighting against the guards.

“I’m so sorry.”

I wince. “Don’t apologize to me. I’m not innocent.”

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