Page 30 of Summer at the Cornish Garden Café

17

THOMAS

‘What do you want to do now?’ Thomas asked Lena when they emerged from the water. Fifi had enjoyed splashing around in the sea with them and had made them both laugh. It had been freeing to strip off and not care about the scars on his body, only about how he felt in that moment. And he’d felt pretty damned good.

Lena was amazing. Not only had she shown him that the scars he had didn’t worry her – emotional or physical — she’d clearly been through an ordeal herself and had the physical scars to prove it. She had one hell of a scar taking up the centre of her abdomen with a few smaller circular scars. It looked as though she’d had laparoscopic surgery and a laparotomy, and he couldn’t help wondering what had happened to her and how she’d managed it all. For her to show him like that had clearly been her way of letting him know that she understood how it felt to have the physical evidence of a battle. He liked that she’d described it that way because he had battled to come back from the edge many times since his accident and he battled every day to stay present.

Lena was also incredibly beautiful. The scars on her stomach didn’t take away from that at all. In fact, he thought they enhanced her beauty. She was brave because she was the type of person who might be afraid of doing something, but she would do it anyway. His admiration for her kept growing as did his physical attraction to her.

‘I don’t mind.’ She pulled a towel from her bag and dried herself, so he did the same then he pulled out a microfibre towel that he’d bought especially for drying Fifi. As he massaged her through the towel, she wagged her little tail and let out a low moan. ‘Fifi likes that.’ Lena laughed.

‘Any excuse to get a scratch,’ he said.

‘Oh… I almost forgot. I have a picnic in my bag. Shall we share it while we sit here for a bit and dry off?’

‘Great plan,’ he said.

And so they sat on the sand in their towels and ate cheese and pickle sandwiches on gluten free bread with salted crips then washed them down with tea. Thomas poured more water for Fifi and gave her an ostrich chew that he’d brought in his rucksack.

After they’d finished the picnic, they stayed there and talked some more about the rescue sanctuary, Lena’s book and village life. Not for the first time, he thought about how easy he found it talking to Lena. Thomas felt relaxed with her. More relaxed than he had ever felt with Daniella, he realised, and that was a surprising thought for him. He’d been with her for two years and thought he knew her, but now he looked back, he could see that they’d been acting out roles as if they were in a TV series. He’d even been afraid to fart in front of her because she said it was disgusting and crude, and so he’d found himself holdingin his wind and that had given him a very painful stomach at times. Surely it was impossible to spend a lifetime with someone and never fart in front of them? If people could manage that then great, but Thomas needed to be relaxed with his partner otherwise it wouldn’t feel real, and he’d be unable to be himself. And being himself was even more important now than ever because he was so changed. He would need someone to accept him for who he was and how he was, and he didn’t know if anyone could ever do that. If they would want to do that.

IfLenawould want to do that…

The afternoon was warm, so he helped Lena put some sunblock on her shoulders, not wanting her to burn her fair skin. She did the same for him and then she took his leg onto her lap and smoothed sunblock over the raised scars, being gentle as she touched the gnarled skin that reminded him of tree roots growing above the ground.

‘You didn’t have to do that,’ he said, aware that his eyes were stinging. He told himself it was because of the salt water but he knew it was because of Lena’s tenderness.

‘I wanted to do it.’ They gazed into each other’s eyes until Fifi got up and shook herself hard and they both yelped as sand and water flew everywhere.

‘Fifi!’ Thomas reached out to steady her. ‘What was that for?’

Fifi dropped into a low bow and barked.

‘She wants to play,’ he said.

‘What are we waiting for?’

Lena dropped her towel and took his hand, and they ran towards the sea again. Thomas threw Fifi’s ball into the shallows and she bounded after it, woofing her delight as she splashed around.

When they’d tired the dog and themselves out, they went back to dry off again. Fifi had some water then stretched out on the sand. Lena lay back on the picnic blanket, her towel wrapped around her. She patted the space next to her so Thomas lay down too. They stared up at the sky watching the odd cloud drift along and a plane that soared high above leaving frilly white contrails in its wake. The sounds of the beach were soothing, and Thomas felt his eyes closing, his breathing deepening, so he rolled onto his side and smiled at Lena. She looked tired too in the contented way people often did after a day at the beach.

‘I think I’m going to fall asleep if I stay here much longer. How about we get some food and maybe watch a movie? You could come to mine.’

‘I’d love that. I could do with showering though as I have sand everywhere.’

‘You can shower at mine if you like. I have plenty of towels and spare clothes.’ He knew she could also head home but he didn’t want to be away from her. If she went now, they might not be able to recapture the intimacy of this moment, and he would always wonder if things could have developed between them.

‘OK then. As long as Fifi won’t mind.’

‘She won’t mind. She loves company.’ He slid Fifi’s harness on and clipped the lead to it, threw his rucksack on his back then picked up his trainers.

When Lena was dressed, they walked up the beach and through the village to his cottage. His invite had changed somethingbetween them, shifted the balance from friendship to something more, and it made him nervous and excited. He wanted to get to know Lena better, to rediscover the Thomas he knew was still inside him somewhere. For a long time, he hadn’t felt like a man, just a patient, a brother and uncle, but not a partner, a lover, or someone’s person. Lena made him feel like all that could be possible again if he was only brave enough to embrace what came next.

Was he brave enough? It was time to find out…

18

LENA

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