Page 42 of My Hunger, Your Soul

His grin is playful and light, and for the first time he actually looks happy and real.

“Mine, mine, mine. Now let's go.”

Ivan grabs my bag, and heads out of the apartment as I walk in a daze behind him. I can't tell if this is romantic, manipulative or fucking toxic. But I like it. Christ, I’m so dumb. I’m that annoying friend right now that you warn away from the bad boy, but ignores your advice to run into their arms, knowing it will blow up in their face.Stupid Tyler.

When we get outside, Ivan wraps his bulking arms around my shoulder and guides me to wherever he is taking me, presumably to his car. Ugh, it feels nice, him holding me. I don’t want it to feel nice, damn it! But I do. We walk in silence, the loud traffic, sirens, and busy streets drown out any thoughts. As we walk further down the street, I do a double take as we pass the guy who bumped into me earlier, lingering next to a shop door. It's hard to see his face fully, apart from his mouth, which is smiling in my direction as we walk by. A shiver of disgust rolls through me. Who the hell is that guy? I look back as I can't help myself, to see him still watching us as we walk away. I feel unsettled, my gut telling me something is wrong. When we get to Ivan’s car, I sigh in relief that I’m not staying at my apartment tonight, as I get the distinct feeling that the guy is watching me on purpose. But, why?

23

IVAN

As I drive us back to the house, there is a notable change in Tyler’s mood. This one is new. I find him so fascinating, so many different expressions and emotions, he’s a puzzle I’m constantly trying to solve. I've never really been around someone like him before, that's so complex. The guys I normally deal with are either angry or, I don’t know, just, nothing. Kai and Seb are the same as Ty. It's almost a full time job watching the guys try to cater to their men's needs. I would say Aaron is the same, but he’s a different ball game, in a league of his own crazy. He fits more with us than the others. But I’m determined to learn all about Tyler and his needs.

“Something’s wrong,” I say to Ty, who’s staring out of the window, transfixed on the surroundings.

“With what?”

“With you. You’re different. I don’t know this mood you’re in.”

“Mood I’m in? I gather you’re not used to people who show their emotions?”

“No. But I need to know yours.”

“I’m fine. I just think I’m a little paranoid. When I got back to my building earlier, a guy bumped into me. Then when we walked to your car, I saw him again and he was watching me. Smiling. I don’t know, it just felt weird. Like I say, I’m being paranoid.”

“Was it Timmy?”

“No. I could only see the lower part of his face as he was wearing a hoodie.”

I grip the steering wheel so tightly my knuckles turn white and my fingers ache. First Timmy, and now this. There is no reason for anyone to follow Tyler, unless it's something to do with me or the family. I have to take several deep breaths to compose myself before turning into a full rage and driving back into the city and finding this fucker.

“I’m gonna give you a knife when we get back to the house.”

“What? No. I’m not carrying a weapon, Ivan.”

“Yes, you fucking are. Just in case I’m not around. You need to know how to protect yourself.”

“I’m not stabbing anyone.”

“Why not? Even if your life's on the line?”

“That won’t happen.”

“It's possible now that you’re with me. This is non-negotiable, Ty. Besides, the rush you get from pushing the sharp metal into flesh. Hmmm there's nothing like it.”

I turn to look at Tyler when he doesn’t respond.

“What?”

“Have you got any idea how insane you sound? Like it's a hobby to hurt people.”

“It is, and you should never judge someone for their vices.”

“Murder isn't a vice, Ivan. It's illegal. It's evil, it's immoral, do I need to go on?”

“It's only those things if the person is good. We never deal with good people.”

“Oh, that's good. I feel reassured,” he sasses, rolling his eyes. Such a cutie.

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