Page 29 of Bullet

“I’d still like you to go,” I press, but less firmly than before. There’s a question there, but Willa doesn’t jump all over it.

“I’ll go. It doesn’t matter where. I was only going to go into arts, and I’m sure no one goes into that because you can’t use it for anything, so anyone will have spots open.”

“You can use those classes as electives for almost anything later,” I huff. “You could even go to law school after. You just have to have a degree before you go.”

“And be a lawyer, like you?”

The cutting edge in her tone bites deep into my usually thick skin. “Would that be so bad?”

There’s a short pause, then a soft laugh. “Yes. But only because I couldn’t imagine myself having the discipline or the mind for it. You’re a whole different kind of smart. It’s freaking fascinating to me how your mind works. I can’t keep a single thing in my brain. I’d be the worst last line of defense ever.”

Despite the tension that hasn’t dissipated from my body yet, I find myself laughing too. I don’t know that those creeps aren’t still watching my sister, or lying in wait. I’ll feel better the second we reach her.

“I’m super sad they’re gone,” she says, pretty much reading my mind, but taking it to a darker place. “Now the club can’t catch them and torture the hell out of them until they talk.”

“I think we all know who sent them, and we already established that’s not an acceptable way to go about getting information, legally or morally.”

“I thought we established it would be fun.”

“They’re human beings. They might have made wrong choices, but they don’t deserve to be physically harmed.”

“What if they’d physically harmed me?”

I pretty much straight up lose my mind at the thought. “I would kill them.”

“Whoa. That’s dark.”

I mean it on the basest, most brutal, darkest level. “Nothing is too dark for you. I’d do anything to keep you safe.”

“Okay… well… Bullet’s place it is, then? At least until the evil ex-lawyer creepy dude with a penchant for arson is sorted out?”

“I-I don’t know.” That’s the honest truth. Me, who usually has it all together, I’m at a loss.

“Why don’t you hook up with him? He’s a hottie and he’s a baddie. That’s a great combo. Even if it’s just some casual sex, you could use getting laid.”

“Oh my god! Haven’t you ever heard that you shouldn’t shit where you eat?”

“That’s so unsanitary!” Her laughter pours over the speakers. It’s a throaty, almost masculine sound. When my sister laughs, she laughshard, and usually to the point of tears. There’s no better sound in the world. It makes me feel like a billion fucking dollars that I brought it out of her. I haven’t succeeded in a while.

“Seriously, though, why not? He’s age appropriate, he has a job, I guess, or at least he did. He owned the range. That’s something. He’s mature, and we know he’s enough of a gentleman to fight for a lady’s honor at a nightclub, even though it’s led to all this trouble, and to offer to do what he could to get us out of it. That proves he can take responsibility. He’s hot too. That doesn’t hurt.”

Thinking about leaving my house and my whole carefully constructed life behind sends a bolt of sheer panic straight to my already overwrought heart. My hopes of becoming a partner at a respected firm one day have been dashed, so there’s the heartbreak and disappointment from that. The worry, the guilt, the uncertainty, the usual pain that’s always hovering just in the background, the bitter tang of loneliness, it’s all there.

“You went quiet. What are you thinking?”

“That I’m a wreck.”

Willa’s sharp bark of laughter crackles this time. “I’ve rarely ever heard you say that. I know it’s got to be true, but you always get it together.” Her tone drops, getting serious. “I know you do that for me, and I can’t imagine what a burden that is. Not me, but having to keep all the bad stuff inside and having no one to rely on but yourself. I’ve always had plenty of friends. I had mom and you, and then I had you. It sucked, losing her, but you made sure I was okay. You’re the only reason I had a childhood at all. You’re the rock I’ve always clung to through all the shitty storms.”

My eyes blur and the tears dribble down my cheeks when I blink to try to focus. “I have to see the road to be able to drive, you know. Don’t kill me with kindness now.”

She ignores me. “You deserve to be happy.” I can’t remember a time I’ve ever heard her sound more serious or melancholy. “Whatever that looks like. You might surprise yourself and find that biker D is it.”

I actually fucking choke on nothing. “I hope you mean vitamin D,” I wheeze.

“Yes.” She giggles. “Vitamin dick. That’s correct. You could use a big heaping dose.”

“Willa!”