Page 57 of You're My Person - For Always

Until today, none of it seemed real.

But the gray, musty-scented walls of the prison beat reality into her.

A rattling within the building grew louder. An oppressive burst of stale air suffocated her. She squeezed River's hand.

They couldn't throw up, cause a scene, or do anything that would shorten their visit.

"Be strong," she whispered, hoping the words made it past her lips.

A guard came into view. Kenna held her breath until stars shot into her vision and she gasped for air.

River scooted closer. Kenna stared through the imperfect glass and caught the moment two guards escorted her dad into the room. He looked like a stranger, and yet that was her dad. His normally clean-shaven face was hidden by a ragged beard. The dark hair her mother used to cut in the kitchen for him was now long and gray. His smooth face was covered with years of wrinkles, hardening his expression and almost hiding his eyes.

Beside her, River sobbed quietly, clinging to Kenna's hand. She stared at her dad, taking in all the changes, trying to find the answers she was scared to know.

She'd read the articles online numerous times. They described him as a murderer. He'd taken four lives. Yet, he'd held her and dried her tears when her mom died. He was the father who beat away the imaginary monsters in her closet and swooped her through the air into her bed so that she wouldn't have to put her feet on the floor.

Dad lowered himself into the chair and put his handcuffed hands on the small platform in front of him without taking his gaze off them. His eyes shifted from left to right, over and over, soaking them in. She could feel that desperation through the glass and in her chest.

The two guards locked his handcuffs to a welded hook in the table, then took the phone receiver off the wall and put it in his hand.

The guard on the right tapped on the glass. Kenna jerked her gaze up.

The man motioned toward the phone on the wall beside her. She grabbed the receiver and nodded, understanding she would communicate with her dad over the phone.

There were no holes in the barrier. They couldn't hear or touch him or feel his breath on their skin.

"Daddy?" she whispered.

Her dad leaned forward because of the chain holding his hands down. His cheek continually twitched, and he closed his eyes.

"I love you." She cleared her throat and repeated, " I love you."

River patted her leg, leaning into her to hear over the phone. She held the receiver between them and pressed her head against her sister's head so they could hear if their father talked.

"I love you, too, Dad." River sniffed.

"You shouldn't be here." Her dad refused to open his eyes. "Forget about me."

The lump in her throat grew, cutting off the air to her lungs. "No. Never. You're our Dad. We want to spend time—"

"Please, Dad. We d-don't care about what happened. That has nothing to do with us. We just want you back in our lives," said River.

He flashed his dark, tormented gaze at them. "I don't want you girls associated with me. I don't need others knowing I've got daughters. You need to go out there and make a life for yourself, away from me."

His voice broke as if from unuse. How long had it been since he had talked to another person?

"No, you can't do that to us." River stiffened beside her. "We've lost mom and you. I lost Kenna. I lost everyone. You have no idea how hard it was to live without you, and now we find out you're alive. You can't push us away. We're family. You have no idea how hard it was to live without my family. If it weren't for Zane, I wouldn't have had anyone."

Kenna could see her dad shutting down. They hadn't come to take out their traumatized childhood on him.

"I knew you were alive." She placed her hand over her heart. "I knew the whole time."

"It doesn't matter." Her dad shook his head. "You're going to lose me again."

"But you're not gonenow." Her fingers ached around the phone receiver. "Don't you want to see us? Don't you want to know how we're doing?"

"Damnit." The chains rattled. "You shouldn't have come."

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