Page 176 of All The Happily Ever Afters

Carter grins at me, not denying it. He knows it’s true.

“I’m sure Chloe’s changed you too.”

Chloe. Just hearing her name does something to me. My Chloe Rose. “You could say that.”

Carter chuckles, a knowing grin growing on his face. “What’d she say about coming back?” he asks, the smile never wavering even though every trace of humor vanishes from me instantly.

I have to look away, feeling a hint of shame that she didn’t want to come back. She fought me on coming back. “She doesn’t know what it feels like being away and missing it, you know?” I finally settle on that truth. “She hates this place.”

Carter’s smile dims, but the corners of his lips kick up at the last comment. “Don’t we all.”

“She doesn’t have anyone left here.”

“You think she’ll come around?”

“I fucking hope so.” The temperature of my blood drops and I tap my foot restlessly against the leg of the chair as I watch the early morning sky turn darker with the gray clouds moving in. I stayed away for as long as I could. I needed to so I could keep her. The only worry that keeps me up now that I know she’s safe is whether or not she’ll stay with me. She was always meant to leave me, she’s too damn good for me and for this life. But I’ll be damned if I let anything happen to her, whether she stays with me or not, she’ll be staying here, where it’s safe and she’s protected. We had to come back; I have to end Romano.

“Does she know? Does she know about what you did before you left?”

I hold his gaze, letting the memories of the life I used to live, the one I’m walking back into, play before us. The violence, the murders. It was an exchange I had to make, one I don’t regret because it means Chloe’s by my side.

“No.” I answer him in a single word, spoken so firmly that it practically ricochets off the walls of the room. “She can’t know.”

Carter gives me a single nod of acknowledgment.

“And what about Marcus?” I ask Carter, quick to change the subject so I can get rid of this revolting churning in the pit of my gut. I know where I stand with Romano. One of us will kill the other, but he has everyone foaming at the mouth to end his life. I don’t know where I stand with Marcus, though. No one ever knows where they stand with him until it’s too late. “Is Marcus going to be a problem?”

Carter’s eyes are assessing as he stands from his desk, turning around to look out of his window as the snow starts tofall. I know somewhere beyond those trees Chloe is in bed still, sleeping, safe and sound.

“Marcus is always a problem.”

CHLOE

“You hungry?” Bastian’s voice startles me and I jump back from the opened suitcase of clothes I set on the sofa.

His rough chuckle at my expense makes me want to smack him, but his strong arms wrapping around me send a warmth through me, calming all those nervous feelings that wormed their way in. “Didn’t mean to scare you,” he says low and deep, pulling my back into his chest.

As I reach up behind me to wrap my arms around his neck, he kisses the crook of my neck right in the small gap my baggy sleepshirt allows him.

With my eyes closed and breathing in his woodsy scent, I remind him, “I’m still mad at you.”

Last night we slept together, my legs tangled with his and my entire being happy to be by his side again. We avoided the argument for the time being … and then I woke up alone. It wasn’t until I found his note on the nightstand that the hollowness in my chest went away. He was only going to see Carter while I slept.

I don’t like this insecure feeling. The nerves are a permanent stitch in our relationship. Like one day I’ll lose him. I’ll wake up alone, and that’s how it will be for the rest of my life.

I don’t want another man to take his place. I only want Sebastian. His lies and hidden truths are what give me that feeling that it’s all going to unravel though. Lies he’s carried for years. Secrets he needs to let go of.

He rocks me gently, and that’s how he gets me every time. He didn’t use to give me this so easily, so freely. The touches, the kisses, the obvious need for me to feel loved.

And I didn’t use to feel like I needed it. But I do. I need him. I need this. Just like I need the air to breathe.

“So food? Yes?” he asks again and I stand up a little straighter, nudging him away because he doesn’t acknowledge the fact that there’s this gaping hole between us. How can we fix what he refuses to admit is broken?

“I’m going to unpack this stuff first.” My knee prods the suitcase and the insides of it jostle slightly as I get back to the unpacking I’ve been tending to. It’s mostly clothes and bathroom essentials. “I assume you’re having everything back home packed up and moved here without my knowledge?” I ask him, peeking over my shoulder just in time to see him cross his arms and lean against the wall.

My gaze drifts to the corded muscles that line his arms and I know he’s doing that shit on purpose.

It’s quiet and I hate that I think he’s not going to answer me, when suddenly he does.

---