“What you need to know is that you’re safe here, and that I love you and I would do anything for you.”
My first instinct is to correct him and tell him it’s not about what I need to know, it’s about telling me everything because I’m his partner. And those are the words sitting there on the tip of my tongue until I look in his eyes and see a hint of worry, and I let his statement digest.
Safe here. Are we in danger? My hand moves to my belly and the fear of loss is all too real. The last time we left this place, death remained behind. The lingering memory of the nightmares and the fears creep into my mind. But I know what happened back then, and it can’t be that. I pray it’s not that.
I don’t know if it’s just being back here that causes chills to trail up my arms and down my spine, or if it’s something else. I swallow my question, knowing Sebastian won’t answer me anyway.
“Just come with me,” Bastian asks, holding out his strong hand for me to take.
It doesn’t mean I forgive him when I place my hand in his. And it doesn’t mean we’re okay when I follow him up the paved walkway to the gorgeous red walnut French doors.
All it means is that it’s getting late, I’m tired, and I don’t want to fight right now.
I fought all my life just to get by. I thought I was done fighting.
I thought wrong.
SEBASTIAN
“Is he going to be a problem?”
I ask Carter the only question that’s been eating away at me as we drove down here. The hate, the anger… the fear, it’s all mixed into a deadly concoction that’s been destroying my sanity for days. Ever since I left Chloe, all I could think is that this prick would go after her. That Romano would take her away from me.
Even though I knew she was safe, I couldn’t sleep not having her right here by my side where she belongs. I don’t know how we lived so long thinking we’d get away from it forever, but we can’t. I’m not running away; I’m not going anywhere. “I’m going to fucking kill him.”
“Romano’s a dead man and he knows it,” Carter answers, the early morning light filtering in from the large window behind his desk.
“While he’s still breathing, he’s a fucking problem,” I respond and run my thumb along my jaw. “I thought about how we could do it on the way over to pick up Chloe and then that cop had to show up.”
“Officer Walsh is a menace. He thinks he can question everyone and wait in parking lots for shit to go down and thathe’ll somehow be the hero? He doesn’t know shit. Not about how things work around here, or about how deep these cuts go. All he’s doing is delaying the inevitable.”
“He has damn fine timing.” I blow out the statement, sitting back farther in my seat and hating that this new cop had to come down here and force us all to wait for what’s rightfully ours. Even though he’s former FBI from New York, all we have to do is wait until he turns his back, just like they all do. He’ll learn what it’s like down here and how far a piece of paper and a badge will get him.
“Romano’s not going to make a move or leave that gaudy piece of shit he calls home. Not unless he has a death wish.”
Fuck, just hearing his name causes adrenaline to rush through my veins and I have to sit up straighter, gripping the arms of the leather chair as I struggle to stay still. “I hate doing nothing.”
“You and me both,” Carter answers.
“You didn’t screw him over, though. He didn’t send out a hit order on you,” I tell him. Chloe is everything to me and I would do anything for her. Leaving the mafia behind and being marked was a risk I was willing to take for her. But I’m back now, and I’m not going anywhere. Not when so much is at risk. The fucker has to die. No one is coming after me or my family.
“I heard about his guys going to Chloe’s when I didn’t show up and he realized I’d left that morning after we got the hell out of here when we were kids,” I say. The sickness burns up my throat and I have to swallow it down, along with the hate and the rage. “Romano didn’t try to kill someone you love.”
I take my words back when I remember what Jase, Carter’s brother, told me last week. The little bit of information that changed the reluctant relationship the Cross brothers had with Romano. “I’m sorry. I heard about your brother.” I’m not theonly one Romano went after. I’m the only one to get away though.
Carter reacts more strongly than I thought he would. He’s younger than me by only a few years. In a lot of ways, he was the younger brother that I never had. But back when we were just kids, he never liked to talk about his emotions. Never. He’d always preferred to just be alone.
“Romano will pay for what he did—to you, and to the rest of my family.” His statement is strained. I don’t miss that he says “the rest,” which means he still sees me as his family too. Even though I haven’t been at his side through all of this bullshit.
Some blood you’re born with. Some blood you choose.
He leans back slightly and a grimace mars his face as he touches his chest. He’s still healing.
“You all right?” I ask him and he nods, still taking a moment to process the pain. To process all of it.
“I miss him,” Carter confesses after a minute and his eyes get glossy. He coughs it away, pretending to be nothing but cold on the outside. But with no one to fight in this cold war, you can only look inward.
“Aria’s changed you,” I comment, knowing it has to be her who’s brought out this new side of him.