Page 64 of Alpha & Omega

He grabbed my arm. “I’m not mad at you… only frustrated, and I really do want to be alone for a while.”

“Okay. Call me if you need anything.”

“I will.”

Feeling a bit defeated by the emotional morning and upsetting Tony, I drove home and took a quick nap before I had to get ready for work.

A nap didn’t improve my morose mood, nor did it improve after a shower and a quick bite to eat. It had been a rough day, but I couldn’t figure out exactly what was bothering me.

By six in the evening, I walked into my bar with classic rock playing in the background and a few patrons drinking at the bar. It’d get busier later, but the few people in here reminded me of my finances, or lack thereof, which did nothing to improve my mood. To make matters worse, I texted Harley earlier, but he never responded. So then I was worried about him on top of everything else.

I stepped into my office, but when I tried to close the door behind me, someone stopped me. I turned to face the bleached blond man and scowled at him.

“Yikes, man. That look could peel paint,” Stix said before he suddenly brightened. “Say, that could work on a T-shirt. I need to write that down.”

“What do you need, Stix?”

He plopped his ass down in the spare chair, put his hands behind his head, and propped his feet up on my desk. I knocked them off, and he sat up straight, completely unfazed.

“Moody much? Seriously, you walked in looking rather gloomy, so I figured I’d ask what’s up.”

“Nothing’s up.”

“So everything’s down?”

I rolled my eyes at the ceiling, not in the mood for Stix’s normal poking and prodding with every other word a fucking snark. God love him, but fuck, I couldn’t deal with it at the moment.

“I’m fine.”

“Sorry, but I’m not buying it. You always tell us we need to talk shit out, be communicative, seek therapy, blah blah blah… and what do you do? Build walls to hide behind. And before you say anything, it’s because of you I learned infinite wisdom through therapy, so yeah… out with it.”

“I’m fine,” I said again, though it cameout as weak.

“Dude, let someone else take care of you for a change, stubborn ass.”

I sat on my office chair and ran my hands through my hair, which was in desperate need of a cut.

“It’s just been a rough day. Harley’s ex-wife showed up out of nowhere after eight fucking years to claim she’s dying to see Hudson one more time. So, Harley’s understandably freaking out. After that, I visited Tony, who looked beaten, saying someone had run him off the road. He was lying, but I don’t know about what exactly. And…”

The last thing I wanted to tell Stix was about my financial troubles. He would only feel guilty and stressed, and he would no doubt run off and blab to the others, stressing everyone out.

“And what?”

“And nothing. I’m just worried about shit.”

I rested my elbows on my desk and my face in the palms of my hands. “And maybe I think I’m falling for Harley. I really wanted to tell him today. It isn’t the best timing for that, but it also scares the shit out of me. Even after all my therapy, that fear he’ll leave is visceral. After everything went down today, I feel like I’m in the fucking way. He’s going to have to deal with grief all over again with Hudson.” I finally glanced at Stix, not intending to spew everything. “Sorry.”

“Sorry about what? That you feel shit and you’re worried? Or that you talked about it? Please… You’re fine. Although, I can’t tell you how my body is vibrating in excitement right now that you’re falling for Harley. Don’t be afraid. Look at the rest of us. We were all scared, but we managed to find love and happiness. Youneedthis, and we all want to see you happy, Alpha.”

I smiled for the first time today. “Thanks, Stix.”

“Your worries are reasonable, but you also worry about everyone and everything. It’s okay to worry about yourself. The best thing to do with Harley, I think, is to talk to him about how you feel and be there for him. No doubt he needs you as much as you need him.”

I snorted a humorless laugh. “You don’t even know him… not really.”

“I know enough, and I know you.”

“Yeah, thanks. Honestly, I do feel better getting it all off my chest.”

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