Page 61 of Alpha & Omega

“So, you just what… came here to make yourself feel better before you die? To bring Hudson into your life only for you to permanently leave?!”

With a deep and shuddered breath, I tried to calm down. “That was… cruel. I’m sorry. But I’m not wrong. Do you have any idea of what Hudson went through after you left? Youabandonedhim! You abandoned me. We spent years in therapy, trying to move past the fact you didn’t want him. He blamed himself for so long. And now you come here and stay in his life until you die? You couldn’t show him just a little bit of mercy after everything you put him through? You came here for you, not for him.”

She sobbed and choked it back, covering her mouth. “No, not for me. To tell him how sorry I am. I wanted to come back sooner, but every time I tried, Istopped, talking myself out of it, knowing you wouldn’t want to see me because you hated me. I hated me, too.”

I deflated on the chair and rubbed my face, not knowing what to do. “How long do you have?”

Ava shrugged. “Six weeks? Maybe more. Maybe less. It’s advanced. It kills quickly and without remorse.”

“Let go!” Hudson suddenly said on the other side of the wall. I sighed, assuming Hudson and Kingston had heard the whole exchange. How could they not? I’d been fucking yelling.

My son came barreling into the kitchen and stopped in his tracks, taking in his mother for the first time in eight years.

She cried even harder. “Oh god, you look… so much like your father. So… handsome.”

“You left me,” he said.

When Hudson’s eyes watered, so did mine.

Kingston finally came around the corner and stood behind me, placing protective hands on my bare shoulders. I fell harder for him at that moment, reminding me I was no longer alone. I had someone I could lean on if I needed them.

“I know I did,” she said tomyson, not hers. Not anymore.

“I heard everything. Your reason for leaving was stupid.” The tears slid down his face, looking younger than sixteen, like he’d regressed to that eight-year-old boy so long ago.

Ava nodded. Unlike with me, she never took her eyes off him. “You’re right. It was stupid. I regret every moment.”

Hudson inched his way closer to her. “You’re… dying?”

Her lip trembled again, and she nodded. “Not much longer now. I’ll die never really knowing you and the man you’ll become… the man you are.”

“That was your fault,” he said so bravely. I was so fucking proud of him.

“You’re right. It was. I have no good excuses, and I won’t make any. I just… needed to see you… before I go, and to tell you I’m so sorry, and to… say goodbye this time.”

I had to look away, unable to take my son’s tears, choking back my own. Flashbacks hit me of him crying at night, holding him, grades slipping, and reassuring him it was never his fault.

As if sensing my growing despair, Kingston gripped me tighter without saying a word or getting involved. Then he let go, grabbed my cup off the table, and poured us fresh coffee. He handed me my mug and sat next to me, holding my thigh under the table.

“This is… Kingston, my boyfriend,” I finally said. The word felt so inadequate, but I couldn’t think of anything else to say at the moment. “Kingston, this is, as you’ve probably gathered, Hudson’s mother, Ava.”

They both said quiet hellos.

“So, you’ve seen me, now what?” Hudson said, bringing our attention back to him.

“Can I spend some time with you… just for a little while, then I’ll go.”

“Okay,” he said with surprisingly little resistance.

I abruptly stood. There was no way I’d let him go with her. “No!”

God,IfeltHarley’spain leech from his skin. He was stiff from holding back his anger and grief. I understood exactly how he felt and agreed with his reaction, but it wasn’t my place to get involved.

I’d just come downstairs after getting dressed when I heard voices. Staying on the stairs, I sat down to listen, not wanting to intrude. Fine, I was a little nosey.

The yelling must have woken up Hudson, so he came downstairs and sat next to me, clearly shaken as he hugged his legs and rocked back andforth. I put an arm around his trembling shoulders as we eavesdropped. At least he stopped shaking so much while I held him.

When he heard she was dying, he tried to run into the kitchen, but something told me to hold him back. He fought me, so I let him go. I wasn’t his father. All I could do was support Harley as much as possible. When I stepped into the kitchen, he looked like he was barely holding it together.

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