Page 94 of Corrupt Obsession

“He died with honor.”

“Hediedinstead of having a life with us. Hediedinstead of getting out when I begged him to.” Lynne’s eyes glistened with tears. “Have you sworn in?” When Jesse hesitated, Lynne shot to her feet. “I forbid it, Jesse. Quit now before it’s too late.”

“Mom.”

“I’m serious. I can’t go through that again.” Lynne ran her hands through her hair. “I can’t believe you’d even consider…”

Violet jolted when Lynne abruptly turned on her.

“You didn’t try to talk him out of it?”

Taken aback, Violet opened and closed her mouth, unsure what to say. She knew Lynne had a temper, but she had never been on the receiving end of it until now. Her glee vanished in the face of Lynne’s wild despair.

“Violet didn’t know. I did this on my own,” Jesse interjected.

“Lynne,” Dad said in a consoling tone. “Let’s talk about this.”

“Talk?” Lynne scoffed as she paced with her arms wrapped around herself. “Apparently, talking isn’t something we do in this house anymore. People just make major life decisions without telling anyone.”

“Mom, this is my dream.”

Lynne planted her hands on the table and leaned toward her son. “You idolize your father, but his choices don’t have to be yours. You don’t have to walk the same path as him. There are better paths. You could be somebody, Jesse. You’re talented inso many areas. Why let them decide what to do with your life? Why submit yourself to that harsh environment? You should enjoy your freedom.” A tear slid down her cheek. “Why do you want to leave us?”

Jesse swallowed, displaying his first sign of discomfort.

“I don’t want to leave you.”

“So, don’t! Don’t go!”

Jesse lowered his gaze to his plate. “I have to do this.”

“Why?” Lynne cried.

Violet’s heart thudded in her ears as silence fell. Jesse was usually so careful and considerate of his mother. It was painful to see them at odds. Lynne looked distraught, but Jesse was standing his ground. Even though she’d initially been ecstatic at the news, Lynne’s devastation was contagious and made her own eyes water.

A crack of thunder made her flinch as the heavens opened and rain began to lash the windows.

“Vi,” Dad said quietly.

She was relieved to be excused from the table and the highly charged environment. No one said a word as she left her half-eaten dinner and made her way to her bedroom. She closed the door and winced when she heard Lynne explode. Her shouting was accompanied by another deafening boom of thunder that shook the house. She put on her headphones and let her punk rock music drown out the unexpected storms that had appeared out of nowhere.

Conflicting emotions sloshed around inside of her. On one hand, she was thrilled. If Jesse went into the Air Force, she’d be free. As Mom said,theywould decide Jesse’s life. He wouldn’t be able to come home whenever he felt like it, like he would if he attended college and had holidays and school breaks. Once he signed, he had to fulfill his commitment, which was a minimum of four years for Active Duty.

It never crossed her mind that Jesse would join the military. Like Lynne, she used to get upset when he brought it up. That was when she actually cared about what he did with his life. Now, she wanted him gone. Out of her life, out of the state, out of the country, if possible. She bit her lip. She despised him, but she didn’t want him dead. Lynne was acting like Jesse would be sent to the front lines. Surely, Mom was overreacting?

Is this what he wanted to talk about when he drove her out to see the bluebonnets? She assumed he wanted to talk about which college he should attend. He hadn’t talked about the military in years. If Jesse had given her a choice of him going to college or the military, what would she have said? She tossed her hair, not willing to entertain such thoughts. Jesse’s future wasn’t her business. It was his, and he made the decision to enlist, which she was happy about—ecstatic, in fact.

Her life had become an endless tunnel with no light, no detours, no one to hold her hand. Jesse would jump her in the dark and corner and coerce her to get what he wanted before he disappeared, leaving her to piece herself back together and carry on, hand outstretched, as she tried to find her way in the pitch-black abyss. Sometimes, when she was too broken to walk, she crawled. She kept going, believing there had to be something up ahead. Jesse’s announcement caused a pinprick of light to cut through the dark, giving her a vision of a near future where there would be no tunnel, no filth, no more structuring her life around ways to avoid him. There was an end to her misery and despite Lynne’s fear, all Violet felt was overwhelming relief.

She tried to distract herself with homework, but her attention strayed. She tugged aside the headphones periodically to check if the coast was clear. The arguing went on for hours. Most of the time, it was Lynne who was shouting, but there was also the low murmur of Dad’s voice in what sounded like a conciliatory tone.

She’d decided to turn in for the night and had just brushed her teeth and locked the bathroom door behind her when her bedroom door opened. When Mom poked her head in, Violet tugged off her headphones and held them in one hand as she took in Lynne’s red, puffy eyes. Her anxiety spiked as she waited for the verdict. Had Mom talked Jesse out of joining the Air Force?

“Mom?”

When Lynne’s face crumpled, she rushed forward, partly because it looked like Lynne was going to collapse and partly because she didn’t want Lynne to see her jubilation. Comforting Lynne while she inwardly did cartwheels made her feel like a bad person, but she couldn’t help it. No one knew who Jesse truly was. This was best for all of them, Lynne just didn’t know it. As Lynne wept, that tiny bead of light in her tunnel began to expand and brighten, so she could practically feel its warmth.

Lynne pulled back and braced her hands on her shoulders. “Please talk to him. He hasn’t sworn in. There’s still a chance for him to get out of his commitment.”

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