Page 62 of Corrupt Obsession

Violet knew the story of King David’s infamous affair—how he spotted a beautiful woman bathing from the rooftop of his palace and summoned her to him. When Bathsheba became pregnant, King David had her husband killed in battle to claim her for himself.

“One sin,” Pastor Sonny said thoughtfully as he strolled across the stage. “Adultery doesn’t seem like such a big deal, but when a child is conceived, King David tries to pass the child off as the husband’s and when that didn’t work, he murdered his loyal soldier.” Pastor Sonny shook his head. “People don’tunderstand that one sin will always lead to another. Once you start on that path, you can’t stop. Before you know it, you’re trapped in a web of your own making. King David thought he got away with it, but God sees all, and the punishment was severe.”

Pastor Sonny listed the many consequences of King David’s sin, beginning with the death of the child that had been conceived during the affair. But it was the tragic story of the incestuous relationship between David’s children, Amnon and his half-sister, Tamar, that made Violet’s blood run cold. Amnon was so obsessed with his sister that he faked being ill to have his sister feed him and then raped her.

“It says here in verse fifteen that after Amnon had Tamar, he hated her more than he once loved her.” Pastor Sonny paused so the congregation could take that in. “Can you imagine wanting someone so much that you risked everything to possess her, only to discover your all-consuming love was just fleeting lust? Amnon wanted her purely because he couldn’t have her, and he paid for that sin with his life when his brother, Absalom, struck him down to avenge her.”

Pastor Sonny held up a finger.

“King David passed his sins onto his sons, who mirrored and amplified them. We think one misstep won’t hurt anyone and that if we’re found out, we can handle the fallout, but we forget that it’s not just us that’s affected. It’s our family, those we love most, who suffer the most for our choices. In King David’s case, that generational curse was passed on. And it doesn’t stop there. It trickles out to our friends and community. Everything you do matters. I think, if we keep that in mind, we could save ourselves and those we care about a lot of grief.”

Convicted to her core, Violet closed her eyes. Discovering that she and Jesse engaged in a sexual relationship would devastate their parents on multiple levels. She and Jesse weren’t blood siblings, but they had been raised as such and that’s howtheir parents wanted them to view each other. Sex complicated things, which is why blended families discouraged it from happening in the first place. To make matters worse, their parents didn’t believe in premarital sex.

If Dad grounded her for suspecting she had influenced the fight between Jesse and Tucker, what would he do if he found out she initiated a sexual relationship between her and Jesse? Jesse paid her midnight visits, but he’d never gone beyond that. She kissed him and then unwittingly taunted him by giving him the impression she was experienced, which made him lose control. She hadn’t stopped Tucker or Jesse from putting their hands in her pants. She hadn’t fought Jesse off when he put her on his bed. A part of her wanted to know and experience, and she had, without considering the aftermath or future complications. What if her carnal recklessness destroyed their family, as it had King David’s? When she was younger, she’d been terrified Lynne and her dad would break up. What if she caused her worst fear to come true?

“In Luke 8:17, it says that all secrets will be brought to light and made known to all. If you think you’re going to get away with your sin, believe me, you won’t. It may take years, even decades, but your misdeeds will be exposed, and you will pay in one form or another. It’s inevitable,” Pastor Sonny said with such conviction that Violet wanted to drop to her knees and repent.

She didn’t realize her hands were balled into fists until Jesse placed his on top of hers. She pulled away and would have scooted closer to Lynne, but she didn’t want to bring unwanted attention to them. Jesse couldn’t touch her like that anymore. They could never repeat what they’d done this week. For as long as she could remember, she longed for a family. God had answered her prayers and given her a mother and brother who gave her the love and affection she longed for. She couldn’t lose them.

Right then and there, she began to pray.Lord, punish me in whatever way You see fit, but please keep my family intact. My parents don’t deserve to be hurt because of my choices. I swear I’ll right my wrongs. I’ll fix my relationship with Jesse. We’ll never do anything immoral ever again. Please don’t expose my weaknesses and faults. I’ll do better. I’ll do anything to make this right. Please have mercy on me.

As if Jesse sensed her distress, he brushed the back of his hand against her thigh. This time, she moved away. Just as she predicted, Lynne glanced at her. Violet rested her head on her shoulder. Lynne didn’t admonish her, but cupped her cheek, comforting her like she was a child. At that moment, she felt like one. Overwhelmed, ashamed, and wishing someone would clean up her mess.

“What some people try to do is turn their sin into something good, but nothing that begins in sin will be blessed by God. It will always fail,” Pastor Sonny boomed.

She hadn’t considered the long-term ramifications of sleeping with her stepbrother. She’d been caught up in sexual discovery, in fulfilling dark desires, and pleasure. How could she be so stupid?

Was it her imagination, or had Pastor Sonny looked directly at her several times? Did God give him the ability to single out which church members this message was for? She’d been lambasted so severely, she could barely sit upright. Each point cut deep like a whip. Between finding out that Tucker was in the hospital and this message, it couldn’t be clearer that God was giving her one last warning before she ruined her life.

Amnon’s reaction after finally having his half-sister played over and over in her mind.He hated her more than he once loved her.It would kill her if one day Jesse despised her or looked through her as he did the other girls he’d dated. Before, she’d been his sister, which made her special, but by sleepingwith him, she became like all the others. Easy, forgettable. There’d been no need to date and woo her—he went straight to sex. And she let him. What if, like Amnon, Jesse desired her because it was taboo and titillating and once he got his fill…?

Ice spread through her belly. It was better to end it now before anyone got hurt. Already, her feelings were engaged, while it could be just about sex for him. He was jacking off in her room even when he had girlfriends. They hadn’t been enough for him. He was oversexed. Maybe any girl would do, and she was just… available?

“Let’s pray,” Pastor Sonny said.

Heart heavy, she closed her eyes. The tears that dropped to her lap went unnoticed as the pastor prayed over the congregation, hoping they could learn from King David’s mistakes and do better in their own lives.

“Violet.”

She swiveled on her chair to see Dad standing in her bedroom. They hadn’t exchanged a word all day. During dinner, Lynne tried to lighten the mood by entertaining them with tales of her students. Violet hadn’t been able to enjoy the food, company, or stories and had excused herself to take refuge in her room. Guilt lay on her shoulders like a heavy, suffocating winter coat. She hadn’t been able to look Dad or Jesse in the eye. She wished she could reverse time and walk away from Tucker when he tried to pressure her to get in his car. So many red flags and missed opportunities to do the right thing. She could have saved them all a lot of grief is she’d stopped it from the beginning.

She spent her time cleaning the heck out of her room and purged all signs of debauchery. She washed her clothesand bedsheets, vacuumed, organized, and erased incriminating text messages. She also messaged Tucker, apologizing for what happened with Jesse, and asked if there was anything she could do. Her fervent, long-winded message received a one-word reply:No. Apparently, she didn’t need to break up with him. It seemed the sentiment was mutual.

Dad advanced into her room and sat on the edge of her bed. “I was harsh with you today.”

She lowered her gaze. “I deserved it.”

“That phone call was a nasty shock. I’m glad Tucker’s going to be all right and that Jesse got off with a tap on the wrist. It could have been a lot worse.”

She nodded.

“I know Jesse didn’t tell us everything and honestly, I don’t think I could handle the truth. But I know one thing. Nothing could have caused such an extreme reaction from him except you. He’d do anything for you, even if it cost him everything. Do you understand that, Vi? Jesse came this close to having something on his record today that would never go away. Your actions have consequences now. Consequences that can mar your future.”

“I know,” she said shakily as her eyes filled with tears.

Dad let out a gusty sigh. “Just… be more mindful. Think before you leap. That’s all I’m asking. Can you do that for me?”

She nodded and tried to give him a smile but failed.

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