He struggles to find a rhythm, moving slowly, in and out of me, each motion deliberate as if he’s afraid I’ll break. But with each careful movement, the buzz of eagerness begins to fade, and my thoughts grow hazy, the need for more intensifying. It’s getting harder to keep my eyes on Walker as he focuses so intently on the action, his every breath mingling with the tension building between us.
I force my eyes shut, my mind slipping back to the memory of the interaction in the library. Reluctantly, that image becomes the only thing fueling the slickness between my legs. My gasps and moans escape freely, each breath shaky as Noah’s hungry eyes and painful touch flood me with heat. I rock my hips into Walker’s fingers, the friction sending warmth pooling in my lower stomach. His fingers falter for a moment, then he picks up the pace, urgency creeping into his movements as I drown in the sensations, unable to focus on anything but the raw intensity between us.
"Fuck, you're getting really wet," Walker whispers, his voice thick with desire.
Sadly, not because of you.
As much as I don’t want to admit it, every time Walker makes a noise, it pulls me further from the memory of Noah, making it harder to stay lost in the feeling of his fingers, which seem like a sad attempt at edging me. I bite my lip, fighting the urge to scream in frustration.
"Go harder if you want," I whisper, my hands trailing up the sides of my body where Noah’s touch still lingers. "As hard as you want."
As hard as I think Noah would have gone.
My mind drifts back to the feeling of his cock rubbing against me, the memory of it making the pressure inside me build. A climax is creeping closer, and I can feel it tightening in my core.
"Mmm," I groan, the pleasure coursing through me. "Just like that."
The way he grabbed my hips. The way he forced me to give in to his demands. The thought of his tongue slowly trailing up and down my clit…
"Fuck," I moan, unable to stop myself. "Just like that, Noah-"
The words slip out before I can stop them, and like a light switch flicking on, my eyes snap open, meeting Walker’s dazed expression.
"Noah?" He pauses, his voice sharp with confusion. Slowly, he slides his fingers out of me, creating a cold space between us, as all the sexual tension seems to evaporate into the air. "Who the hell is Noah?"
I bite my lip, scrambling for an excuse, but nothing feels right.
"An ex?" I mutter, rubbing the back of my neck. "A recent ex-"
"Wait, were you thinking about him while I was fingering you?" Walker’s voice is edged with annoyance.
Fuck.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
"No," I stutter, panic creeping in. "I just haven’t been touched in so long, and the last person to touch me was him-"
It’s not entirely a lie.
"I’m sorry," I add quickly, trying to defuse the situation. "Feelings just… arose, and I must have spoken out of habit-"
"Is that why you were struggling to get aroused?" Walker asks, his voice tight with hurt. "Because I’m not him?"
His words land like a punch. Walker looks more crushed than angry, like I’ve kicked him, the hurt radiating off of him.
"Walker, I wasn’t struggling-"
"So then, why close your eyes to avoid looking at me?" His voice snaps, the pain sharper now. "That’s what you were doing, right? Imagining it was him touching you?"
I swallow hard, the heat rising in my chest.
"Listen, Walker, the breakup is recent, and he knew my body so well-"
Even in his prime, Cole’s touch never haunted me like this.
Noah has taken residence in my mind in ways I wish he hadn’t.
"Well, maybe you can text him and have him finish you off," Walker’s voice hides the hurt beneath the words. "I have homework to do."