Page 50 of The Billionaire & the Nanny: Part 4

I look up and close my eyes with a small, satisfied smile. I knew she wouldn’t lie. I never should’ve doubted her to begin with. Ray’s the opportunist, the liar who’ll stop at nothing until he gets what he wants. He’ll step on as many toes as he needs to. Ray left Evie, didn’t participate in the pregnancy, and it’s all right here on her phone. Putting the phone back in my bag, I sigh knowing I have what I need, if it ever comes down to a courtroom.

Three days. I spend three days holed up in this suite, ordering food and ignoring calls. Alana texts me the first morning, a question about Liam and what she should do about a rash he’s developing. Her tone is stern, includes nothing about us, and my heart aches knowing she probably hates me for leaving. I left her plenty of money in the account, and she should have no problem getting Liam to a doctor for the rash, but I just can’t be there for her today.

I have to figure out a plan first.

* * *

The plan arrivestwo days later in the form of an idea that wakes me up so fast, I nearly hit my head on the night stand. No fucking way Ray is going to take Liam away from me. Even if he does prove paternity, the judge will know who was there throughout the pregnancy—me. Throughout the birth—me. Throughout his upbringing thus far—me. Plus, there’s all the text messages and emails on Evie’s phone.

Liam is my son, by heart and virtue, and awarding custody to Raymond would be the worst thing any judge could ever do. Still, I can’t ignore the panic in my heart knowing I could lose him at any moment, and because of this, I get the grand master plan to go home and take my son on a vacation—just me and him alone, away from the city. Where will we go? I have no idea, but wherever it is, Ray will have to find me.

* * *

I can hearhim giggling as soon as I unlock the front door. Liam, having a grand old time in the bathtub, splashing and screeching like a dolphin. That kid sure loves the water so much, he’ll probably become a swimmer in the future. I head up the stairs toward the happy sounds, knowing today will probably be the day Alana leaves for good. I can’t imagine she would take much more of this after all I’ve done to her.

All part of my plan to help her move on and find a life without me.

Pausing at the bathroom door, I knock softly to announce my presence. Alana’s kneeled at the bathtub, that perfect shape from behind a sight for sore eyes. “Hey,” I say.

She doesn’t reply, but Liam’s face lights up like a sunbeam and he proceeds to splash the fuck out of Alana. I bite back a laugh, but what I really wish I could do is cry my eyeballs out. I left these two alone, I put Alana through hell, and now I’m about to tell her it’s time to go.

“When you’re done there, could you pack a bag for Liam, please? I’m taking him for a few days.”

At this, she has words for me. “Where are you taking him? He’s just getting over a cold.”

“Don’t worry, he’ll be fine. Make sure to pack his jacket.”

“And what am I supposed to do while you’re gone?” Vicious eyes glare at me over her shoulder. I wish I could unsee them, but now they’re there, burned into my consciousness forever.

“You can go home a while. I don’t know how long I’ll be.”

“You’re going to hide him,” she says.

“No. I’m going to spend time with him. I have a feeling this will all go south, hon, and I want to spend as much time with Liam as I can. I know you think I’m a coward, but I’m trying, Alana. I tried to be a good father, got fucked. Tried to be a good husband, got screwed. Tried to be a good friend, shafted. Tried to honor my mother’s memory…”

Ugh, I can’t fucking finish that one.

All this happened because I couldn’t let what happened to my mother happen to anyone else ever again. Welcome to my life.

Alana finishes the bath, wraps Liam in a fluffy towel, then moves past me. Circles ring her eyes. I’m sure she’s been up every night because of Liam but also because of all the uncertainty I’ve caused. After she sets Liam on his bedroom floor with a bottle, she comes out of the room and stands in the hall.

“Listen, we’re not so different, you and me,” she says. “I lived around rich families all my life then the minute I got out of that world, I got sucked back into it. Nothing else to do but hold your head up, grin and bear it. You, you stayed away from relationships and falling in love, only to find yourself a wonderful best friend, then you got snagged into being a father.”

“What’s your point?” I ask, itching to get away from this lecture.

She crosses her arms, and for a split second, she looks like my mother whenever she was mad and ready to give me a talking-to. “My point is that you don’t get to choose the people you love in this life. The universe chooses them for you.”

“I don’t believe in the universe making decisions for me,” I say.

“What else would explain how we got here when neither of us wanted it?”

“I call it misfortune.” Spinning and heading toward my room to pack a bigger bag, I try to get away from Alana and her fortune cookie wisdom.

“Well, I call it fate,” she says, following me. “And loving you was never my misfortune, Kase. Believing I might earn your love in return was.” Her words sting but I can’t look at her, or I’ll want her again. She has power over me, the power to make me stay, and I can’t let anyone control me that way again—ever.

“You earned it alright. But this is how my love is, Alana. Incomplete and aggravating. You don’t need this kind of love. Nobody does.”

“I guess you don’t love me enough to change then.” I hear her voice catch at the end, and when I glance her way, I see her crying. I fucking hate when she cries, especially since I know she doesn’t do it to manipulate me. In fact, I’ve never seen anyone hold her tears in better than Alana, so seeing them run so freely now makes me feel like the biggest douchebag alive.

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