Page 16 of The Billionaire and the Nanny

Penelope

Central Park is alive.With children, nannies, mothers, joggers, pigeons, pigeons, and more pigeons still. It’s another blustery September day and Lilly Belle and I love being outside. Her azure eyes are wide, alert, taking it all in. I swear this child is an old soul. Lilly Belle is my spirit animal.

Immediately after talking to Ethan the other morning, she took to patting my face, cooing, as if saying, “Listen, Penelope, it’s all going to be okay. You made a mistaken. Fuck it. Get over it. You can do this.” She agreed her uncle is a dickhead and we should both moveon.

We’re thick as thieves, Lilly Belle and me. Sometimes when I look at her, my heart wells up with so much love that I feel scared. I shouldn’t get too attached.

Maybe because she doesn’t have a real mother and father, I’m growing closer than I should. This is just a job, after all. I could be fired any day, especially with a boss like Ethan.

When we reach the playground, I stop the stroller in front of a bench and take a seat on the edge. Four other mothers or nannies sit crowded on it, chatting. I smile at them, hoping one of them might say something encouraging. I could use some non-babbling adult conversation. But they all smile at me with those forged, upper East Side smiles, like they know I’m not Lilly Belle’s mother.

“Are you Ethan’s new nanny?” One of them with big, bright teeth asksme.

I’m taken aback. It’s not like I’m wearing a name tag or T-shirt. Then, I realize I’m being stupid. It’s Lilly Belle they recognize. She’s probably come to the park many times before me, as other nannies vied for the job. “Townsend?” I ask, just to make sure. Stupid, since I guess everyone knows him around here. Especially these hot yoga mommies who make it their business to know everyone else’s.

“Yes, Townsend,” toothy woman laughs. “You’ve survived a whole week? Amazing.”

How she knows exactly how many days I’ve been in the Townsend house, I don’t know, but it shouldn’t surprise me. These women learn everything about everyone. “Yes, I’m Penelope. Nice to meet you.” I nod quickly then bend to fuss over Lilly Belle’s toys, making sure they’re all secured to the stroller and nothing’s going to fallout.

An eerie quietude falls over the bench. I don’t want to look at them, but I just know they’re exchanging looks. I’m fresh meat, even though I’ve been to this park a million times. Though never with Lilly Belle.

Ethan’s surprise child is surely big news around these parts.

It’s faint, definitely not meant for me to hear it, but I do—a whisper from the end of the bench. “She must be good at what she does.” Cackles titter across the row of women. It’s clear that she means I must be having sex with Ethan Townsend, and for a moment, I’m appalled.

Then, I remember that I am having sex with Ethan Townsend.

Even if it was only one night. One incredible, mind-blowing night that I still think about constantly.

My cheeks redden. I’m mortified, because they’re right. These catty bitches are right. I’m probably still employed because I was good at what I did in the bedroom that night. Suddenly, I’m pissed at myself again, as a myriad of questions flit through my mind. Did he “audition” the other nannies? Did I have sex with a man who’d just “interviewed” several others in the same week? Were any of these women on the park bench part of his auditions? Have any of them seen him naked the way I have, laid eyes upon his chiseled form and massive cock as I have? Suddenly, I feel so small. So stupid. A notch on his wall. Of course there’s nothing special aboutme.

And ever since it happened, I’ve kept my door unlocked intentionally, in the hopes that he would come see me, but he hasn’t. In fact, he’s barely been home. It’s like he’s purposely avoiding me, and again.

I should be grateful not to see his heartless face. I should be glad he’s not there to tell me how to do my job. I wonder if he micromanages his people at work the way he micromanages me. I should be happy I only have Wilson to watch over me for a few hours each day. He says he doesn’t come every day anymore, but he has, simply because he likes watching me and Lilly Belle interact.

Wilson makes me smile.

Ethan Townsend doesnot.

Ethan Townsend can kiss my ass for making me wish he’d slip into my room again, take my into his arms, and lay a soul-wrenching kiss onto me. A heart-stopping, breathless kiss that weakens my legs like I’m some baby giraffe standing for the firsttime.

The evil bitch moms are still tittering, and that’s my cue to go. I stand, nod at them, because unlike them, I am polite, refined, and un-full of shit. I push the stroller along the route. Lilly Belle bangs her little hands on the stroller tray over and over, going, “Ba, ba, ba, ba…” loving the sounds of children playing on the junglegym.

“Yes, Lilly Belle, those mommies were bad, bad, bad girls. You and I are not. You and I rise above. We’re survivors. Especially you, sweet pea. You’re the bee’s knees.” I laugh to myself. The bee’s knees, like my mom alwayssays.

I love my job. Despite it all, I reallydo.

The rest of our park time goes well. I pick up an orange fall leaf and hand it to Lilly Belle, who stares at it like it’s a sparkly diamond in a dark, dark world. But then, figuring pretty things must also taste delicious, she crams it into her mouth, and I pluck the crispy pieces off her tongue. “Silly, you can’t eat that,” I say. Silly nanny, for giving it toher.

“Can’t you just get the kid a burger?” It’s a man’s voice I recognize. When I look up at the angled afternoon sun, I see Robert Ellis, a friend of my family. In running gear, he slows down, smiles, leans in for a short hug. “What’s up, Penelope? Still doing the nanny thing, Isee?”

I smile. It’s nice to see a familiar, friendly face. Robert was just a skinny kid in high school the other day, but now he’s about nineteen and looking like an adult--almost.

But compared to Ethan, he looks like a goofy young boy still.

“Hey, you! Nah, I married a billionaire and gave birth to a seven-month-old since you last saw me,” Ijoke.

“Aww, don’t break my heart, Wallach. You know I always had a crush onyou.”

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