Page 57 of Sinner

“Good to hear.”

“May I ask a terrible question about your friend?”

Sam lifted his eyebrows. “You’re curious as is everyone else about whether he was the monster the media portrayed him to be. Correct?”

The news had finally broken about his involvement with a seriously underage girl. Heinous acts had been alluded to, but I knew how the press liked to glorify the truth just a bit. “I was wondering of your involvement in the company might hurt this partnership and everything you’ve worked so hard to build.”

“I won’t lie; I had more than one sleepless night while thinking about whether I should continue moving forward. I have no doubt if Merrick’s name remained on any product the combined company would be hurt, potentially catastrophically. But I’m dropping all reference to his products and simply using my own. That was at the advice of my corporate attorney and while he and I have fought over the years, I’m going to take his advice this time. Joel was brilliant, but over the last few years, he changed. Sadly, I didn’t know how much.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“I am too, but I’ve learned during my forty-eight years on this planet that everyone has a secret. Mine? That I keep Twizzlers in my bottom drawer.”

His admittance was so out of the blue I laughed. “I don’t know what mine is. Maybe that I could eat chocolate for breakfast.” The guilt continued to eat at me, swirling like a taste of the plague.

My darkest secret is that I hunger for masked men to break into my home and fuck me.

That would go over well.

“I think we all could. Ask my wife. She is required to hide the chocolate chip cookies from me. Thank you for taking your time, Jess. Please do think about my offer. I would love to have you in the new position.” He handed me an envelope and all I could do was smile since I felt so awkward.

I nodded and headed for the door.

“Just one thing, Jess. Keep in mind that the Blackwell Group are snakes. Truly venomous snakes who will do anything in their power to destroy their competition. Including foul play of every kind. I just thought you should know.”

Something told me the promotion was a counter measure and in truth, I wasn’t certain how I felt about that at all.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” And I would, although I wondered what fate had in store for me at this point.

What terrible fate did I deserve?

CHAPTER 17

“When you gaze into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.”

—Friedrich Nietzsche

Jessica

There was something so incredible about the darkness, the ability to fade into the shadows while still being able to see everything about you.

At least I could.

I’d learned to love the dark from my father. He’d taught me about the stars and constellations, allowing me to dream big as a kid. I’d gravitated toward computers at an early age, my teachers shocked I’d learned to write code when I was eleven years old.

Some had called me autistic because of my gift, but it was simply that I enjoyed numbers because they never lied. I had no desire to be a boring accountant though. After I’d been given my firstreal game, not the kids’ stuff played on a handheld when I was six, but games with substance, I’d been hooked.

For some reason, I felt the need to remind myself of that as I drove into the driveway. Maybe it was because of Stephanie’s warning. I was so focused on revenge I’d gotten lost in the pleasure instead of focusing on the intent.

That needed to stop.

Or maybe I needed to stop fixating on destroying a man’s life. In turn, I could potentially create havoc with my own. Shanna would never want that for me. She’d seemed genuinely happy until she wasn’t. Certainly, Xander couldn’t be blamed for the horrible fate bestowed to her. It had been no one’s fault. Unless I wanted to blame God.

After stopping the car, I closed my eyes briefly, shoring up my resolve for about the fifth time. At least I could celebrate having another job offer, a damn good one. What worried me more than anything was whether my thoughts and actions were muddled because of my hatred. If so, I might easily make the wrong decision.

If only Xander wasn’t so handsome. I laughed at myself while thinking about his incredible physique. Neither he nor his brothers fit the description of typical gamers. They looked more like models straight off a magazine shoot or maybe racecar drivers on the French circuit.

Anything but men whose claim to fame was built on hours upon hours developing codes. More power to them. I envied their addiction and attention to detail as well as their professional savvy.

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