Page 11 of Cayden

“Then consider your work done. I am damn well surprised. In fact, I am quite over the surprise and have now gone into shock.” He slid off the bed and went to get a robe from the closet. Dragging it on, he turned to look at her. “Why in the hell do you need me? You obviously have everything covered.”

“I know you are angry…”

“I am way past that.”

“But in the long run you’re going to see that I was right.” Her face took on a pleading expression. “It happened on the first try…”

“So, that’s why you came back home early.” The look on her face told him he was right. “You lied to me.”

“I didn’t…”

“You deliberately started an argument so that you could leave, so I would let you leave.”

“Let me leave?” Her eyes flashed. “I am not a child.”

“You went behind my back and did this because you knew I would never agree to it.” He was so angry; he could hardly stand it. “We discussed how dangerous…” He dragged his fingers through his hair. “The risks involved. How you could lose your life…”

“Dr. Melbourne assured me that I will be carefully monitored.” She spoke rapidly, feeling the fear spiking her heart. They had discussed the enormous risks and how they ran the risk of losing some if not all of the babies. She had read where several mothers had died in the quest to chase after the IVF dream.

“I will be careful. I will do everything the doctor orders.’ Her voice broke slightly. “Just…, please, give it a chance.”

“You gave me no choice,” he said harshly. “You took it away from me.”

“Because you would not listen to reason!” She cried. “Do you know how I felt each time I miscarried? Like a failure. Less than a woman. I have seen the way your parents look at me, especially your mother.

She was able to produce three boys! Three! And I have not been able to carry a child to full term. You are the heir to the company and that means it’s on you to produce a son.” She rubbed her hand over her mouth. “I had to do something. And if you cannot understand that – then…” She broke off abruptly.

“What I cannot understand is why you went behind my back. Why the secrecy? Why couldn’t you have waited? You just turned thirty…”

“And my biological clock is ticking so much, it’s driving me crazy.”

He stared at her for a full minute, before turning on his heels.

“Where are you going?”

“Away from you,” he told her coldly, “if I stay, I am very likely to do or say something that I will no doubt regret.”

She sat there as he slammed out of the room.

Burying her face in her hands, she took in several deep breaths. She had hoped that his coming home and the lovemaking that had followed would be enough to soften his opinion., He had surprised her.

She had looked up and saw him standing there and her heart had started beating like a trapped bird fluttering to escape. The thick dark hair carelessly tousled no doubt by the breeze, the black silk shirt that made a stunning contrast to his tanned skin.

Broad shoulders she loved to cradled her head on and a chest wide enough to burrow into. The scent of him, the feel of his thickness inside her had fooled her into thinking he would be on board.

That he would understand why she had to do what she did. Moving her hands from her face, she dragged her fingers through her hair. How could he not understand that she had begun to question herself.

That she felt inadequate and riddled with guilt. That she kept asking herself that if he had married someone else, they would have had a son by now. She had to do something.

She knew the risks of course. She had not just jumped into something she did not understand. She had studied the effects and consequences at length, and she was willing to take the chance. It was not only for her, but it was also for both of them. She was tired of feeling like an outcast and less than a woman.

Swiping the tears from her cheeks, she slid down and curled into a ball. She should go and find him - force him to talk about it. But she knew her husband and knew when to leave well enough alone for now.

*****

He was gone the next morning when she woke up. A terse note had been left on the bedside table. ‘Gone to play tennis with a friend. Will probably be away for dinner as well. I am not ready to talk about this yet.’

She read the note twice before folding it and putting it in the drawer. She was about to get up when there was a discreet knock on the door.