Page 47 of These Jagged Edges

"Maddox, get in."

"No.”

We've been easing back into things these past few weeks, allowing things to settle back into place between us. We haven't had sex and despite how badly I crave him I don’t want that dynamic. You know the whole let's fuck like bunnies and hope that magically fixes the problem dynamic. I'm a grown-ass woman; I’m not sweeping anything under the rug. Shit got heavy for a bit and we both need time to work through that without mixing sex into the mix.

It's Joe's birthday today, and like every year, we headed to the lake to celebrate. Nothing compared to Thunder Lake—crystal clear, ice-cold water nestled deep in the piney woods. It was the perfect little oasis. Waylon got the grill going, we all swam, and Vic took the boys fishing. It was our tradition, the same routine, but it never got old.

Henry and Mags usually came, but Henry couldn’t get out of work and Mags was still in Europe. Maddox and Mercy tagged along, and the minute Maddox took his shirt off I cursed myself for deciding to wait before climbing that man like a tree. The man is a walking Adonis, well, maybe an emo Adonis but damn. His olive skin shimmered in the water, and a rebellious curl often tumbled onto his face throughout the day. Every time he caught me looking, he'd give me a knowing look.

"Girl, put that book down and get in the water! It's too fucking hot out!" Vic calls out disrupting my thoughts.

I close my book and take my cover-up off. Bending down, I pile my hair on top of my head in a messy bun before getting in the water. There’s nothing special about my swimsuit, it's a simple black one-piece that’s cut higher on the sides showing off my thighs, and the back is completely cut out. You can’tsee my scars unless I’m spread eagle, and I don’t plan on kart wheels or gymnastics anytime today or ever.

As I right myself, I bump right into Maddox. "Jesus! How you can be so big and quiet at the same damn time?”

"Woman, you've got to make sure you warn a man next time."

Old insecurities show their ugly face. "What? Why?"

Maddox's eyes darken. "Because you in this brings me to my fucking knees, and this is a family event, but later, you're going to pull this aside," Maddox slowly traces the bottom of the swimsuit where it sits on my panty line, his large body blocking me from everyone's sight, making me squirm, "so I can finally bury my tongue back in this sweet, sweet pussy."

I lean in closer, my voice low and daring. "You promise?"

"Oh, baby, you’re going to ride my face until I fuckingdrownin you." His voice is rough and deliberate, each word sliding from his lips as he bites down, his gaze locking onto mine with an intensity that sends heat rushing through me.

Sweet Jesus. I may have come a little right then and there.

"Mama!"

Charlie breaks the trance and Maddox excuses himself to Mercy's truck muttering about me being a little vixen.

As I’m helping Joe pack up, I overhear Maddox tell Mercy that he might feel comfortable trying to drive again, and I know I can help. The boys insist on going back with Vic to help clean the fish they caught. So, I figure there is no time like the present. After a quick kiss goodbye, I turn to Maddox. The only thing left for me to do is make him sit there and trust me to take care of him like he has done so many times before for me.

As Maddox's face becomes increasingly panicked, I know it's my job to offer a bit of strength and nudge him. As I run my hand lovingly up his neck, I faintly trace the scar on his lips, reducing him from a hard stoic man to a puddle.

"Look at me, baby."

Maddox turns those green eyes on me.

"Do you trust me?"

"This is different?—"

"Do. You. Trust. Me?" I ask firmly.

He stares at me intently. "With everything."

"All you're doing is sitting right there." I point to the driver's seat. "We're not driving anywhere, I promise, all you have to do is sit your big sexy ass in that seat. That’s it.”

With a shaky nod, Maddox sits in the driver's seat ever so slowly before shutting the door. I had to push the seat as far back as possible for his long legs and it still isn’t enough room, but it gives him enough room to sit. After the door is finally closed, I round the car and take the passenger seat. Maddox has broken out in a cold sweat and his fists are balled up on his knees. He's staring straight ahead but I know he's a million miles away.

"Tell me five things you see Big Guy."

Maddox slowly blinks. "The lake, the trees, a boat," he pauses and shifts his head left and then right, "the dock, and the boy's fishing poles."

"Good." I slowly clasp his hand in mine and bring it up to the steering wheel, but before he can panic, I ask him to tell me four things he can feel.

"Your hand on mine, the steering wheel..." His knuckles turn white as he grips the steering wheel tighter.

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