Page 96 of All of Me

The rhythmic clank of metal pipes echoes through the shop as I tighten another valve, my hands moving mechanically while my mind is somewhere far away. Barrett’s face keeps flashing in my head, his bright, hopeful eyes as he stood at the door last weekend, asking if I’d be at his first T-ball game. The memory punches me in the gut every time it surfaces.

I promised him I’d try to make it, but here I am instead, miles away, wrench in hand. The Columbus Junction project is demanding enough, but now we’ve got the investors for the West Haven Ranch breathing down our necks. They want the work done within the next few months, and it’s my job to make sure that happens.

The weight of it all presses on my chest like a boulder, but none of it matters right now. Not when I know Barrett is looking for me in the stands, and I’m not there. His first T-ball game, and I’m missing it. What if he thinks I didn’t care enough to show up? The thought alone is enough to make my stomach churn. I twist the wrench harder than necessary, my jaw clenched tight.

“Hey, you good?” Will’s voice cuts through my thoughts, snapping me back to the present. He’s leaning against the workbench, his brow furrowed as he watches me.

“Fine,” I mutter, though the word feels hollow. I tighten the valve one last time and set the wrench down, avoiding his gaze.

“Yeah, sure you are,” he says, crossing his arms. “You’ve been on edge all morning. What’s going on?”

I hesitate, dragging a hand over my face. Will knows me well enough to see through the lie, so there’s no point pretending. “It’s Barrett,” I admit, my voice low. “His first T-ball game is today. I told him I’d try to be there, but…”

Will nods, his face softening. “That’s rough, man. First games are a big deal.”

“Yeah, well, I’m not there, am I?” I snap, more harshly than I mean to. I sigh, dragging a hand through my hair. “Sorry. It’s just—this job, it’s important, but it feels like I’m missing everything that matters.”

“You’re doing what you have to,” Will replies. “Barrett knows you love him. He’ll understand.”

“Does he?” I shoot back, my voice sharp with frustration. “Because all he sees is me not showing up. What kind of dad does that make me?”

Will sighs, leaning back against the bench. “Look, I get it, but you’ve got a lot riding on this job. West Haven’s investors aren’t exactly known for their patience, and if we don’t hit these deadlines…”

“I know,” I cut him off, my tone clipped. “Believe me, I know. But try telling Barrett that the reason I missed his first game is because a bunch of suits want their steam lines done faster.”

Will doesn’t say anything, just claps a hand on my shoulder in silent support. It helps, but only a little. The truth is, I feel like I’m being pulled in a hundred different directions, and no matter where I turn, I’m letting someone down.

By the time the workday ends, I pull out my phone, already dreading what I might see. Sure enough, there’s a text from Sabrina telling me Barrett got a hit.

The air rushes out of my lungs as I read it. My thumbs hover over the screen before I type out a reply: Tell him I’m proud of him. I’ll call him tonight.

I shove the phone back in my pocket, the guilt clawing at my chest. Barrett got a hit. He looked for me. I wasn’t there.

The drive home feels endless, each mile a reminder of the choices I’ve made and the sacrifices that come with them. When I pull into the driveway, Callie’s car is there, and the lights are on in the house. I know I should feel relief, gratitude even, but all I feel is torn.

What if I’d stayed in Cedar Bluff instead of moving to Hawkridge? What if I’d found a place closer to Barrett, where I could be there for games and school events and the little moments that matter? The thought twists in my gut, and for a split second, I wonder if I made the wrong choice.

Then I step inside, and the chaos of home greets me—Sara’s drawings on the fridge, Ruby cooing in her swing, and Callie’s voice humming softly from the kitchen. It grounds me in a way nothing else can, reminding me why I chose this life, why I moved here in the first place. Being with Callie makes me happy in a way I never thought possible. She’s my home, my family, and I wouldn’t change anything about the way we came to be.

Still, the ache of missing Barrett’s game lingers. I feel like I’m straddling two lives and falling short in both. I want to be there for him the way I’m here for Callie and the girls, but I don’t know how to make it work. Not yet.

I pull my phone from my pocket and step into the quiet of the den, my heart tightening as I scroll to Sabrina’s number. The thought of hearing Barrett’s voice is the only thing keeping me steady right now. I hit call, pacing the room as it rings.

“Hello?” Sabrina answers, her tone light but tired.

“Hey,” I say, trying to keep my voice even. “Can I talk to Barrett?”

“Of course. Hang on.” There’s a muffled rustling, and then Barrett’s voice fills the line.

“Dad?” he says, excitement lacing his words.

“Hey, bud!” My chest loosens, the sound of his voice like a balm. “How’d the game go?”

“I hit the ball!” he exclaims, and I can hear the pride in his voice. “And I ran to first base, and then second! Everybody cheered. It was so cool!”

My throat tightens as I picture him standing on the field, his little face lighting up with excitement. “That’s amazing, Barrett! I’m so proud of you, buddy. I knew you’d crush it out there.”

“Did you see it?” he asks, his voice softer now, hopeful.

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